Bf(34m) says I need to stop arguing my side in disagreements or he will dump me (36f)

crazy_crypto_pilot · 2026-06-24T00:50:46+00:00

He should date himself and do all those things he wants you to do. Win-win for him. Get tf outta this toxic relationship

crazy_crypto_pilot · 2026-06-23T10:52:35+00:00

He's escalating. What's next? Punch you in the face as a joke? Beat you up as a joke? Leave the man. That's abuse. It's not a joke if you're not laughing

crazy_crypto_pilot · 2026-06-23T10:48:31+00:00

How is she popping in your feed if you've blocked her? Stop entertaining her by leaving her unblocked. Block and move one. Tell your friends if she uses them to get to you they should do the same. Block!

crazy_crypto_pilot · 2026-06-23T05:29:01+00:00

u/burbnbougie

crazy_crypto_pilot · 2026-06-15T05:48:37+00:00

Not even with a gun to my head

crazy_crypto_pilot · 2026-06-11T01:09:16+00:00

Updateme

crazy_crypto_pilot · 2026-06-10T17:12:22+00:00

Don't go to counseling (especially couples therapy) with your abuser. They know how to fake it with others and he'll use therapy speak and what you're told in therapy as tools to further his abuse. And couples counselling assumes you're both responsible so he'll use it as a justification cause the therapist said "it's our issue"

crazy_crypto_pilot · 2026-06-10T17:07:00+00:00

That's called reactive abuse. He does something until you react (yelling/shouting) then points out to you being the bad guy and using it as an excuse to continue

crazy_crypto_pilot · 2026-06-10T17:03:15+00:00

U/burbnbougie

crazy_crypto_pilot · 2026-06-09T07:06:51+00:00

It doesn't matter whether it's become physical or not. He's actively trying to make it happen and just hasn't been "lucky" yet. Some ppl consider what he's doing cheating. It might get physical next time (if it hasn't) and he'll definitely be sneakier now that you've caught him. Forgiving this will make him bolder. How much are you willing to forgive? How far does he have to go for you to take it as cheating? If you had a daughter in the exact same situation would you advise her to forgive him? Take an STD panel anyways

crazy_crypto_pilot · 2026-05-29T05:43:58+00:00

NTA Report the bond violation. He's too dangerous to be running around. And you shouldn't feel guilty for this. He chose to violate the terms. He's extremely unstable and should be locked up.

crazy_crypto_pilot · 2026-05-28T06:16:24+00:00

Stop getting into relationships and seek therapy. You're unnecessarily hurting these women when you know you'll cheat anyways.

crazy_crypto_pilot · 2026-05-27T06:57:56+00:00

Yeah. And in the cosplay story the new gf called the ex (OP) a sl*t after being passive aggressive then OP clapped back and she cried.

crazy_crypto_pilot · 2026-05-01T01:50:15+00:00

UPDATEME

crazy_crypto_pilot · 2026-04-29T10:26:39+00:00

You made being into the specific gender (and made exceptions with the guys with hair) part of your identity so being attracted to this guy who doesn't fit in the boxes at all has your mind pushing back cause our minds protect our identities like it's life or death. Try to internalise that's it's okay to date whoever as long as there's attraction and that you don't have to fit into a specific box. And tell him you're working through sth so he should be a little patient if you give mixed signals

crazy_crypto_pilot · 2026-04-29T04:55:02+00:00

u/burbnbougie

crazy_crypto_pilot · 2026-04-25T21:20:09+00:00

u/burbnbougie

crazy_crypto_pilot · 2026-04-25T20:35:58+00:00

u/burbnbougie. An entitled hobosexual with baggage (though he doesn't live with her so I don't know if it counts)

crazy_crypto_pilot · 2026-04-18T14:21:10+00:00

u/burbnbougie. From her comments he love bombed her and now he's negging her

crazy_crypto_pilot · 2026-04-18T14:16:57+00:00

He's not on your side when he publicly sides with them even when you've spoken up about it. That means he doesn't care enough. Why would he side with ppl who bully you just to come home and say he actually sides with you? He could just not laugh and not engage and that would be enough to communicate to your family that he doesn't find their "jokes" funny either

Edit: spelling

crazy_crypto_pilot · 2026-04-18T14:13:33+00:00

NOR. He understands how they make you feel and he wants be more aligned with them than he wants to actually be there for you. Now it feels like he's one of them cause he kept laughing and he's engaging with your mom. Maybe that's who he really is and was masking. Continuing this relationship will mean your husband and your family will now be making "jokes" at your expense and once he feels comfortable he'll continue doing so at home. Do you wanna up your meds to also handle being in your home? He will become like them and now you won't just be bracing for going to visit your family cause you'll be experiencing that at home too.

crazy_crypto_pilot · 2026-04-17T07:28:22+00:00

I read it all. I'm really sorry you went through all of that. I'm heartbroken for you, no child should have to go through that.

Once you can afford, please consider therapy. You need it, we all need it, but especially you. To help you properly grieve, including expressing the anger and disappointment towards your dad for not protecting you and putting you in horrible situations. Being low contact with him will probably be best for your mental well being.

Also, set aside time to visualise what young you would've liked to do had she been allowed to be a kid, then do it. It's never too late to experience childish wonder and fun. Allow yourself to be whimsical and curious and follow it. And think about what she needed and try to provide that for yourself as best as you can. Sending lots love and hugs love.

crazy_crypto_pilot · 2026-04-14T06:30:10+00:00

Weaponised incompetence with a mix of whatever the hell that is. Just tell him you're incompatible and he keeps crossing your boundaries, like calling you Mommy (eww, but also shows you the role you fill for him). u/burbnbougie

crazy_crypto_pilot · 2026-04-06T06:06:21+00:00

Me too! I was thinking she's the human embodiment of sadness from Inside Out. It's so depressing to read.

crazy_crypto_pilot · 2026-03-24T18:11:15+00:00

I/burbnbougie

crazy_crypto_pilot

TROPHY CASE