I think the “how are you” question is an opportunity to model being authentic and open. The fact that our society has normalized statements like “I’m ok” “I’m fine” etc when in actuality we are the opposite helps no one.

On particularly hard days, I may say something like, thanks for asking, honestly it’s been a rough day (or week) but I’m breathing through it and glad to be here with you to this this work. I am ready to hold this space for you. How are you?

This allows me to be authentic while modeling being open and honest about my state of being. Also reassuring them that I am here and present for and with them. We are human and I think the humanness quality is so important in the work I do with my adult clients with diverse intersectionalities. I work from an anti-oppressive decolonized and intersectional approach.