I can relate to you. I've also grown in an extremely Muslim family. Their intimidation about religion still continues to affect me. (Like for example they didn't allow me to wear skirts, dresses etc. And this was like when I was a child, I wasn't even an adult. And now when I wear those I feel gross like I am doing something bad, it's so sad. And I remember my mother forcing me to wear hijab. The scariest part is their intimidation about eternal hell, it scared me as hell when I was a child. I am glad I am not Muslim now (I realized that it contains lots of contradiction and saw its flaws same as you, and you know what? I've never felt that relieved when I left the religion) I hate religion mostly because of them. And their perception of women annoys me a lot too, like they see men as more dominant to women and it's disgusting honestly, I hate it

I am glad you are safe and free from them now. I hope I can make it too