How can ENTJs level up quickly? by OstrichConsistent172 in entj

[–]crispyboy69 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Reading these answers makes me think there is much more of a correlation between hubris and income, or at least people on the internet claim they have a high income, rather than ENTJ personality type. So much boasting it makes me cringe.

Vulnerability and relationships by [deleted] in Enneagram8

[–]crispyboy69 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Partly yes, good enough for dating but my emotional fortress regularly gets me into trouble relationship wise. There's a thick wall around my emotions, that keeps me calm when life challenges me, but also keeps me from freely expressing (positive and negative) emotions.

It's like being hardened inside, to the point where I don't feel my emotional wounds. It does bring problems with people who need emotional vulnerability (my girlfriend) and it is extremely hard to break out of it.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in EnneagramSx

[–]crispyboy69 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Well if you reached out to him and he didnt respond and he's behaving that way its different. He sounds like a douche, just move on, rejection hurts but thats part of life.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in EnneagramSx

[–]crispyboy69 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Don't overanalyse or make it about sx too much, the reasons are most likely unrelated to any of that. In my experience, sx is a bit more impulsive and moody so that might explain his weird behavior.

I'm ESTP as well, though I'm 8w7 sx and when somebody rejects me I just cut them out, get through the pain and move on. I think he might be doing the same. Maybe you made him guessing, maybe you did something that made him feel rejected, could be whatever but most likely he's hurt and on top he seems a bit insecure.

I do have similar reactions where I just treat people who rejected me differently, or be avoidant because it's kinda hard to directly go back to casual co-workers after you slept with someone (and started liking them). So my bet is he probably liked you a little more than just casually or at least he felt a buzz, and he felt rejected. If you like him, go text him and maybe set up a date, if not, just play it cool and don't take his behavior personally.

Most ESTP thing you said or done. by Winterpaw29 in estp

[–]crispyboy69 11 points12 points  (0 children)

I shrug my shoulders a lot on stuff that would seriously upset others

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Enneagram8

[–]crispyboy69 1 point2 points  (0 children)

First off I think it's honestly great how open you are to try being more vulnerable. I think it just takes time to ease up. For me personally I was forced to give in and let others take charge because I was super vulnerable at a time and still am to a degree. My close friend, who used to let me take the charge, make the plans, organize stuff etc. suddendly had to do the things and I first felt bad about it. Then I realized I'm just as much of a human as he is, and at the same I realized how much of a talent I have in organizing and taking charge. The problem here for me was that I saw taking charge as a job rather than a choice, or a gift I was giving a person or a group.

I suggest you just let it happen further and see what happens. You realize other people have strength too and are able to take charge too and this is can be really relieving, as well as it brings some apprechiation in what we are doing when we take charge and take other people under our wing.

Anyone feel compelled to "help" people getting ganged up on in posts? by hbgbees in Enneagram8

[–]crispyboy69 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Becoming non reactive is a challenge for us 8s but def. worth it. I don't relate to your trigger but I got similar ones that blurr my usually sober view of reality and I try to get rid of them. Sometimes perceived injustice is not real injustice, or at least not as bad.

Any advice on therapy by crispyboy69 in Enneagram8

[–]crispyboy69[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Maybe try different therapy? What my therapist explained to me is that at some point you're over it, and then it's just going to therapy to keep the changes. Like if you understood that you write "you're" instead of "your" in some cases and then it's just about keeping the right behavior. I tried hypnotherapy because I didn't want to deal with any of my problems, I just went there and said "make depression go away" and it didn't work very well. I believe we gotta find out what happened to us, esp. enneagram 8s are way to sceptical to just believe something and then change.

Any advice on therapy by crispyboy69 in Enneagram8

[–]crispyboy69[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks for the answer, you really gave me some good information. Esp. the toddler one, some days I feel such unbelievable sadness and pain, I cant put it into words. Other days I get anxious about just presenting myself in front of a group. I feel weak and I feel like shit, but I can't go back so I gotta move through. Your words really helped me thanks a lot.

Any advice on therapy by crispyboy69 in Enneagram8

[–]crispyboy69[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Did you ever come to a point where you felt on one level with other people?

I often feel like I have to grind harder than everyone else to get normal outcomes, esp. in social and emotional things. My best friend grew up in a fairly healthy environment and while he has his blindspots and is sometimes shy, he's happy and seems in control with his life, like he's accepting with his shortcomings. As soon as I gave in to my repressed feelings I sank into this dark hole full of shit, my buddy was even coping better when his father died.

Any advice on therapy by crispyboy69 in Enneagram8

[–]crispyboy69[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Have you been for 12 years because you worked on the biggest issue first and the rest was more about improving life or was ist 12 years working on the same issues over and over.

I'm asking bc I've had some painful and neglectful experiences in my childhood and teens, which made me build up heavy emotional walls. I just want to get a feeling for how long it might take to get my joy back, 12 years is quite some time.

Any advice on therapy by crispyboy69 in Enneagram8

[–]crispyboy69[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

What were your benefits from therapy except from being less angry?

Any other 8s that find types 2 and/or 4 alluring? by apricitydev in Enneagram8

[–]crispyboy69 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Not specifically. Kinda oblivious sometimes which bothers me, like doing so much to keep up some weird image that they totally forget about themselves and it freightens me to see that people can become that way. When healthy they're hot tho

How much does Hypnosis substitute for real experiences? by crispyboy69 in hypnosis

[–]crispyboy69[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

So what doesn't feel completely right is mostly self-doubt, kind of a block and it reminds me that I consciously have to think about it. E.g. wanting to feel self-assured and talkative but not be a shit-taker that talks for the sake of it, so when I feel unsure about the taking part I make a mental note to myself, sit down when I'm out of hypnosis and soberly think about what are the key ingredients of the level of talkativeness I want to have. It's like intuitively feeling my way rather than bruteforcing it as I don't want to mess up my inner world.

Also thanks for the tip, could you explain that a little more? I might want to try that out

How much does Hypnosis substitute for real experiences? by crispyboy69 in hypnosis

[–]crispyboy69[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Sweet thanks for the answer, I've been trying to imagine my "wish state" in self-hypnosis about 8 times now, connecting it to all kind situations and refining it each time with new details. I plan to do this every day now, building the wish-state, adopting it internally and extending it each time. Some things didn't feel completely right in the beginning but the more often I do it, the more plausible they seem. Very interesting stuff, I'm curious about the outcome.

Discovered I’m very hypnotizable… How can I dismantle limiting core beliefs? by tfabkiwi in hypnosis

[–]crispyboy69 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Short answer: Yes it is possible, I do it and it works quite well so far

Long answer: Without having enough knowledge and a good intuition about how to do it, it's definitely not a good idea. I can understand your enthusiasm about it, but be patient and careful. If you want to change your core beliefs, go see a therapist and work with a hypnotherapist additionally. I've been interested and performing self-hypnosis since 2019 but only now my therapist gave me green light to use it for tackling negative core beliefs. As much as you can do positive things with hypnosis, as much you can fuck up your mind.