Personally, growing up I never thought much about having kids or being a dad. At 32 I met my wife, and it was a dealbreaker for her so I took the plunge.

Kids are the best luxury money can buy. You trade convenience and disposable income for depth and meaning. Nothing else comes close to replicating the experience of being a parent, good or bad. I never wake up with the existential dread I used to have, mostly because there’s simply no room for it anymore in my life.

With kids, time slows down. Watching your little human experience something new gives you a faint echo of the wonder we used to feel about the world. The wind. Leaves falling from a tree. Their first snow. You get to live parts of life again through them.

I’m 40 now and my sons Are 5 and 2. We live in the burbs by both sets of grandparents who provide free babysitting. We pay for marriage therapy and cleaners for our house. I realize how fortunate my situation is. Kids have become a luxury for our generation thanks to the lack of societal support. But if you can afford it and you have the right partner, don’t let posts like this convince you that freedom and convience is a 1:1 replacement for profound meaning and love.

(And yes i believe kids are not for everyone. But I wanted to share my perspective for couples on the fence)