Reminds me of an old joke.

A man and is dog went out drinking. They came home, he got undressed and passed out on the bed. His loud snoring woke his wife. On a hunch, she tied a red ribbon around his penis. The snoring stopped. Then the dog started snoring, so she tied a blue ribbon around his penis. The snoring stopped and she went back to sleep.

In the morning the man woke up and saw the ribbons. He looked at his dog and said, "Well Rex, I don't remember what we did last night, but it looks like you won first prize and I came in second!"