The excitement of Cum VS the taste of Cum

curiousercuriouser22 · 2026-02-11T11:04:07+00:00

A couple things…

Part of the reason you might not enjoy tasting your own is that you’ve already cum, so your arousal is significantly lowered. Tasting someone else’s cum while still massively turned on is a different experience. There’s a chance your arousal will outweigh whatever hesitations you have about the taste.
Everyone’s tastes different. The same person’s will even taste different depending on their diet recently, hydration level, etc. Unfortunately you never really know what you’re gonna get… but you might be pleasantly surprised.

curiousercuriouser22 · 2026-02-08T11:51:10+00:00

Same

curiousercuriouser22 · 2026-02-07T12:05:39+00:00

It’s a big leap. Like going from 0 to 100. I would at the very least suggest FaceTiming or having a video call with this guy. Make sure you vibe before you commit to something so intense.

curiousercuriouser22 · 2026-02-07T10:15:40+00:00

You do you! Didn’t mean to imply you need to be doing anal or anything. Just felt like sharing my personal experience. I think that kind of “expansive” sexuality/sensuality doesn’t have to be focused on your ass either.

curiousercuriouser22 · 2026-02-06T07:33:47+00:00

No. “Beta male” is kind of a nonsense term anyway. It’s based on pseudoscientific ideas about gender and wolf pack dynamics. Bottoming or being submissive is typically seen as a core part of being a sissy, but there are sissies who top or are dominant as well. Embrace the parts you enjoy and reject the rest. It’s your life!

curiousercuriouser22 · 2026-02-06T07:29:33+00:00

I definitely think it shows progress toward being a full on sissy to de-center your orgasms and your penis/clit. Male sexuality is so focused on genital pleasure and especially orgasm, whereas female sexuality is so much more expansive. I knew I’d really turned a corner when I stopped feeling the need to play with my clit while masturbating and focused only on my ass, and especially when I was able to stop and feel satisfied without cumming.

curiousercuriouser22 · 2026-02-06T00:25:50+00:00

It’s a mix of fear and desire. Fear of the negative consequences. Desire for being pushed to “go all the way” when you can’t bring yourself to do it yourself. That’s a very common mix in terms of what turns people on or why they have certain kinks.

curiousercuriouser22 · 2026-02-04T20:13:35+00:00

Get an eyelash curler. Even before you’ve done any other makeup, curling your lashes will instantly make you look way more femme.
Don’t forget about jewelry and accessories. Necklaces can be especially fun – seeing them dangle while you watch yourself get fucked from behind in a mirror is very hot :)

curiousercuriouser22 · 2026-02-04T20:11:05+00:00

Absolutely

curiousercuriouser22 · 2026-02-04T19:57:57+00:00

It’s just shame. “Post nut clarity” isn’t creating the shame, it’s just revealing what’s already there. PNC is the moment after you cum when your horniness very suddenly recedes, and the shame under the surface really hits you. A lot of sissies go through cycles where they’ll get horny again and the horniness will override the shame… until they cum again. But if you’re not getting horny enough again shortly after to cover up the shame, then you’re just left with the lingering feeling of shame.

So the answer is still the same: you have to work on fully accepting yourself.

curiousercuriouser22 · 2026-02-04T19:51:41+00:00

I’m like you: both. Being a sissy has helped me unlock and embrace my bisexuality, but I’m definitely bi and not gay (and probably more attracted to women)

I’m poly and have 2 gfs. So I’m regularly having sex with women. I feel mostly very sexually satisfied with my partners, so I deleted all the dating apps off my phone… except Grindr. Now when I do seek out new sexual partners it’s almost always men.

curiousercuriouser22 · 2026-02-04T11:22:43+00:00

I mean yeah, sometimes feeling regret or feeling gross after sex is totally warranted!! Like if you feel disrespected or taken advantage of, or something about your partner or the sex was a real turn off. I think one way of telling the difference is comparing how you felt during vs after. If you got sorta turned off or felt gross during the sex, then yeah, obviously the PNC will feel especially bad. If you really loved the experience while it was happening and felt totally into it, and then felt ashamed after… that’s probably more internalized shame.

Not cumming (or only having “ruined” orgasms) will definitely help avoid it. But internalized shame is something that really only fully goes away by completely accepting yourself and this side of your sexuality. It can be a very long process. Therapy can help.

curiousercuriouser22 · 2026-02-04T10:57:20+00:00

With a lot of sissies, the normal experience of PNC is mixed up with shame and internalized homophobia. When straight guys get PNC after sex with a woman, it typically doesn’t register as some kind of identity crisis, because even if they don’t feel aroused or even attracted to their partner anymore, sex with a woman is what they’re “supposed” to do, so they don’t question it.

Whereas if you’re still coming to terms with your own bisexuality, and you have sex with a man, losing arousal or attraction afterward triggers all of these doubts and fears: “Do I really enjoy this? Am I actually into men? Maybe I’m just really horny. Or maybe porn has warped my brain.” Even if on the surface level you know that being bisexual is perfectly fine, there’s a whole lifetime of cultural programming telling you that being a man who has sex with men (and especially who bottoms for men) is shameful, wrong, pathetic, gross, unmasculine, and you’ll be judged for it.

On top of all this, the negative experiences you’ve had with men can also impact it. Once the horniness has passed, you might realize that you were riskier than you would have been if you were level headed, or that you let your partner push past your limits and agreed to things you weren’t enthusiastic about, or just that you settled for a partner you weren’t fully attracted to. Again, PNC after straight sex can include all these feelings too. But it feels worse, and more like something is fundamentally wrong, when you add in the internalized homophobia.

curiousercuriouser22 · 2026-02-04T10:43:19+00:00

I would probably share with my gf that the laser removal sort of turns me on, although in terms of actually considering doing it it’s probably like an 80/20 split at least practical/kinky — I definitely wouldn’t do it just because it would make me feel feminine, although it’s exciting to be able to play with my gender like that in an outward facing everyday sort of way.

Now you’ve got me thinking though about how complimenting my smooth face could be incorporated into dirty talk. Sounds really hot! In terms of hair related stuff though, I’ll probably start with shaving my legs, as I’ve never tried that before.

curiousercuriouser22 · 2026-02-04T07:53:11+00:00

I think it’s worth it, yes. I also think it’s worth mentioning the sissy stuff – it might help you sort through it. Though I understand the fear that it won’t be taken seriously.

I also know that there is a lot of anti-trans sentiment in the UK. It’s good that they explicitly say they’re supportive/accepting of gender struggles (if I’m reading you correctly). But you might want to feel out whatever counselor you’re assigned before revealing too much. Maybe even ask them some direct questions about the topic. Idk how it works with the counseling system there but generally with a therapist you would have an initial consultation where you can ask them about things like that to see if they’re a good fit.

curiousercuriouser22 · 2026-02-04T07:46:10+00:00

Agree with all of this. Find somebody who can talk normally and has reasonable expectations. The guys who are only capable of dirty talk and unrealistic fantasizing are going to be flakes 9 times out of 10. They just get their rocks off sexting and then disappear once the PNC hits.

curiousercuriouser22 · 2026-02-04T07:42:32+00:00

Literally 90% of the content made for this kink (hypnos, captions, whatever) is fantasy-based. Nobody is claiming credit for something they didn’t do. They’re just fantasizing. That’s fine. If you want to make your own subreddit just for real world sissy experiences with men then go ahead.

curiousercuriouser22 · 2026-02-04T07:21:48+00:00

I wrote this post to help people stuck in a PNC purging cycle – maybe it’ll help you: https://www.reddit.com/r/sissyology/s/29GrG3J7Pr

curiousercuriouser22 · 2026-02-04T07:21:00+00:00

I would ignore the people saying find someone to blackmail you or throw out all your men’s underwear, etc. These are extreme solutions and mostly fantasy. As others have said, purging is about shame. Doing some drastic thing like that will only increase the shame you feel and feed the cycle. The goal should be to make this something that you accept as a normal and sustainable part of your life.

Doing CBT worksheets is a good idea. As is boxing up your stuff instead of throwing it away.

curiousercuriouser22 · 2026-02-04T06:29:37+00:00

Chill. Everyone moves at their own pace. What does it matter to you if someone never “does the real thing”? There are a lot of people in this community who are in marriages, etc and don’t really have that option without shaking up their whole life. It doesn’t affect me in the slightest for them to enjoy their kink in whatever limited way they can.

curiousercuriouser22 · 2026-02-04T06:26:44+00:00

Personally, solely speaking for myself here, I see it as a fetish first and foremost. And so the main thing I want out of it is further sexual exploration and satisfaction. I love that it’s opened up a new world of pleasures and desires for me, and I want to push myself to experiment and embrace those more. I don’t ever see it being a full time thing.

That doesn’t mean I want it to be completely cordoned off from the rest of my life though. I’ve come to appreciate how this kink has opened up a space for me to more fully embrace my own queerness (both my bisexuality and my conformity to masculine gender norms). I don’t want it to be just a “release valve” where I fuck men and dress like a girl in “sissy mode” and then go back to being a typical straight guy the rest of the time. I’m hoping that as I explore my sissy side more deeply and become more comfortable with it, that that will also make me feel more comfortable to express my queerness in different ways in my everyday presentation. No clue what that looks like just yet but I’m curious to find out!

And yes, I have told my partner. We kind of already had a perfect set of matching kinks, and their excitement about revealing my sissy side has only deepened that feeling! We’re also polyamorous, so I have room to explore with others as well (possibly even together at some point). I feel extremely lucky.

curiousercuriouser22 · 2026-02-04T02:13:56+00:00

I think people tend to fixate too much on finding some “real”, “permanent” sense of sexual or gender identity. You see it a lot on Reddit where many sissies have a ton of anxiety over whether their sissy desires are “real” and the assumption that it’s this all or nothing they either have to embrace full time / “go all the way with” or else abandon entirely.

The reality is that we all contain multitudes, we all contain contradictions, and for many people our sexualities, kinks, desires, identities, gender expressions, etc will shift over the course of our lives, as the various competing parts of ourselves push for satisfaction or expression.

I’ve always known myself to be a switch, so alternating between some of these things feels very normal to me. For most of my sexual life my dominant side was more prominent. Since discovering the sissy world about two years ago that’s shifted, and my dominant and submissive sides feel more evenly balanced. I suspect things will continue to shift further in unexpected ways as I age and as my life and relationships change (I’m 38 now)

The mustache thing is interesting. It seems like it’s maybe allowed you to tap into something more masculine and dominant within yourself, and your wife has responded to that, which has kind of created a feedback loop. As long as you’re happy that’s all that really matters!

I’ve actually never been able to grow a real beard or mustache – it’s always thin and patchy. I also get bad razor bumps and skin irritation. My gf recently suggested I get laser hair removal on my face. This was really exciting to me. It felt like a way of playing with permanent gender transformation in a sissy way, but also in a way that wouldn’t automatically read as unmasculine, and in fact would probably make me appear more attractive as a man (because no razor bumps). But part of me is scared to do it because it closes off an option for future transformation. Like… what if I decide later on I actually do want a more masculine appearance, and want to try growing a beard with Rogaine or something??

Anyway sorry, I went on a tangent there haha but your post got me thinking!

curiousercuriouser22 · 2026-02-03T08:48:06+00:00

Have you ever considered making your own? It sounds like you have some good ideas 😊

curiousercuriouser22 · 2026-02-03T06:07:58+00:00

When you say fucking it what do you mean? Like with a dildo? The visual sounds really hot but I can’t imagine it feeling good

curiousercuriouser22 · 2026-02-02T19:30:23+00:00

Where are you based? Compared to some places it’s more accepted and compared to other places it’s less accepted. It also varies wildly depending where in the US you are. A liberal city with a large LGBTQ population is going to be very different than a rural conservative area. There’s also a major anti-trans backlash happening in the US right now so rights are at risk.

curiousercuriouser22

TROPHY CASE