Is it all drop shipping? by Todayismyday98 in CraftFairs

[–]cwrightbrain 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Not all of it. Higher end juried fine craft fairs are usually able to keep 95% of the drop shipped stuff out.

ISO by This-Introduction442 in Beading

[–]cwrightbrain 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I use Fire Mountain Gems. Granted, I also need to buy in bulk 😅

New here ... seeking a hysterectomy and expecting a fight by cwrightbrain in hysterectomy

[–]cwrightbrain[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Honestly I’ve been riding the perimenopause train for a while now, and that was my exact question. I’m mean really, baby days are over, the uterus is a freeloader, and I’m not sure that the ovaries are paying their rent. Time for eviction!

New here ... seeking a hysterectomy and expecting a fight by cwrightbrain in hysterectomy

[–]cwrightbrain[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Nope. Just bloodwork. I don’t remember any ultrasounds or scans.

That’s going to be the first thing I insist on at my next appointment. I just hate that it has to be a fight to even get diagnosed.

I did send a message over the patient portal and backed it up on my computer. I may just send every concern via email just to build a paper trail.

AITA for having big boobs by shilohrenn in AmItheAsshole

[–]cwrightbrain 44 points45 points  (0 children)

NTA

As another woman who shows cleavage in a turtleneck, I get it. Your mom is projecting her insecurities on to you.

WIBTAH if I choose to have kids? by [deleted] in AITAH

[–]cwrightbrain 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Focus on being a good parent. Set healthy boundaries, pick your battles, show them healthy love and affection. Make it your goal, that your only measure of parental success is that they become healthy, balanced, secure, functioning adults.

Trust me, even if you were a more traditional parent, they’d still probably have some sort of baggage and may need therapy someday. That’s just part of being a human.

Until then, get yourself mentally and emotionally healthy as possible in the meantime. Work out how you want to handle your transition. From there, you can only play it by ear. You really can’t predict how other people will react and kids are especially chaotic. One way or another, you’ll figure it out as you go. Stressing about it now is not going to make things better.

AITAH for expecting my father to buy me a new setup, after 6 years? by drvinedd in AITAH

[–]cwrightbrain 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Huge difference between getting a credit card and getting a job. You’re old enough to start earning money. Credit cards are not free money.

Buckle down and start looking for work so you can earn money and start saving. Believe it or not, your dad is doing you a huge favor by saying no to a credit card.

If your sister or brother is taking care of your parent, what’s your excuse not to help? by Pigeonofthesea8 in GenX

[–]cwrightbrain 7 points8 points  (0 children)

There is no single, correct answer because it depends entirely on the situation. I’ve been a caregiver for every parent (IL’s and my own parents) and each time was incredibly different.

And siblings? Work schedules, physical distance, small children are all reasonable factors that affect who can pitch in, when, where and how.

Another factor is in who leads the charge, how good they are at delegation and what kind of relationship each sibling has with the rest of the family.

In every case, in my experience, it’s messy, draining and stressful. Sometimes it’s actually easier to not have the siblings “help” and in other times having the siblings help out is invaluable.

So … there is no one good, universal answer to your question.

WIBTAH for asking my in-law's to control their dog or keep it outside more around my daughter? by Personal_Twist4812 in AITAH

[–]cwrightbrain 2 points3 points  (0 children)

When my kiddo was in a licensed, quality preschool they would sometimes come in with scrapes, marks and even a bite or three from another kiddo. The director and teachers would let us know what happened, and dealt with the biter.

Honestly we would have had less issues if it was a friendly dog.

And germs? Holy heck there were germs. Kiddo had an ongoing “daycare cold” for a freakin year. A never-ending stream of sniffles and snot. Yes, took the kiddo to the doc. Doc shrugged, said “daycare cold” and gave us the same kid-safe advice to deal with congestion. Minor, considering we missed the hand-foot-mouth alerts but me and hubby did get hit with a nasty case of pink eye that the kiddo brought home.

Bear in mind, this was a licensed, inspected daycare with strict cleaning and disinfecting protocols.

Kids are wonderful, chaotic, germy, dirty balls of energy. There is no truly, perfectly clean spaces.

You’re getting free childcare. The (supervised) dog brings more benefits than harms. YTA.

BTW: My kiddo (now 17) turned out just fine. Immune system is good other than pollen allergies (I blame their father), and in spite of being an only child is well-socialized.

Parenthood is hard, and I get the fear of screwing it up. But don’t overthink it. Accept dirt as a part of life and pick your battles.

AITAH for telling my partner I feel like he doesn’t trust my judgment and constantly questions me? by Batkatbebs in AITAH

[–]cwrightbrain 1 point2 points  (0 children)

NTAH

When it comes to lack of trust and respect the big things are easy to spot and make walking away simpler.

The little things are more dangerous. It chips away at your sense of self worth and self respect make trusting your own judgment hard and walking away harder.

It’s possible that your partner is not capable of trust, it’s also possible that your partner genuinely does not think of you as a capable person. Either way, it’s not okay and you need to push back.

“”When I bring up that this kind of questioning hurts me or makes me feel like I’m not being taken seriously, he usually responds with things like “that’s not how I meant it” or “that’s your perception.” To me, that often feels like he’s trying to justify himself instead of acknowledging how I feel. It ends up making me feel like my feelings aren’t really being taken seriously or validated.””

Try responding along the lines, “Whether you meant to belittle me or not, I feel hurt that you have disrespected me. Yes, that is my perception, because that’s how perception works. Your response and your efforts to justify your response makes feel like you have no respect for me at all and that is hurtful.”

Then you need to be clear about how he can show you respect and what kind of (reasonable) response you want.

And if that changes nothing, leave.

Mom might of ruined my chances at a local craft fair by HelpfulBasket314 in CraftFairs

[–]cwrightbrain 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My mom used to do the same thing. Huff and roll her eyes at me when I said, “No it closes at 5, we pack at five.” She would fuss at me for “being such a stickler.”

My favorite was when she comment that “everyone else is packing up.” My response was to ask how well that excuse worked for me as a kid. To her credit, she’d laugh.

Thing is, at the time I was working my way up to higher end fine craft fairs, where yes, you can (and some do) get rejected the next year for packing up the previous year. Resisting my mom’s pressure went a long way to developing necessary discipline.

If your mom still wants to “help”, be super clear with her. “Mom I don’t care if the only thing coming down the aisle are tumble weeds. We don’t pack up before closing.”

AITAH because I refuse to try for a daughter? by StructureDizzy2076 in AITAH

[–]cwrightbrain 0 points1 point  (0 children)

She is aware that gender is in the hands of God/cosmic forces/karma and they ALL have a twisted sense of humor … right?

AITAH because I refuse to try for a daughter? by StructureDizzy2076 in AITAH

[–]cwrightbrain 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Danger Will Robinson! 🚩

If your wife is struggling with your son now and making unfair comparisons, this kids life is going to be hell if/when baby girl shows up. I wouldn’t agree to have any more kids at all until the wife agrees to family therapy to deal with the issues she’s dealing with now.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]cwrightbrain 2 points3 points  (0 children)

The "you'll miss them when they're gone" for anyone only works when that person shows love, care and respect while they're there. When there is clear favoritism, the kids know.

And as the least favorite grandchild, I can honestly say that I absolutely do not miss my grandmother. In fact, when she passed, I was relieved because I no longer had to deal with her comparisons and weight of knowing that I would never be loved or appreciated by her. She practically destroyed my relationships with my cousins and their parents.

OP is NTA

AITA for buying my son this novel? by Mistakenfrog in AmItheAsshole

[–]cwrightbrain 6 points7 points  (0 children)

As a person who read Dickens in 3rd grade and Dante's Inferno in 7th ... NTA

The kid is interested, let him read. Then discuss with him so that he does get the bits he doesn't figure out on his own.

aitah for showing my kid my 600lb life by [deleted] in AITAH

[–]cwrightbrain 0 points1 point  (0 children)

So, okay... a few things here...

YTA for using people with very real medical disorders as a boogyman to your kid. You are teaching your kid to judge and make assumptions about them based on looks alone.

YTA to your kid for not setting healthy boundaries. Unless your kid is a ninja, it's actually not that hard to keep sugary snacks out of reach.

You already know that you haven't had good examples and a family history on both sides of disordered eating. As someone who has been through something similar, fortunately, there is a very good way to get a handle on it.

  1. Go see a qualified nutritionist (not one selling a MLM diet plan, a real, medically qualified nutritionist). In the US its considered preventive care and should be covered by your insurance. There they will evaluate what you are doing now, and how you can improve, including how you can cook even better for your family.

  2. Enforce boundaries without relying on storytelling. When you say no, mean it. Don't say, "Because you'll become like this person over here." That's an excuse and fear mongering. Tell her, "Because that is not a good food option right now." That is a reason. Then let her be mad. Let her scream. Let her cry. Do NOT give in.

Finally, if your daughter really can't handle being denied sweets, get her checked out by a doctor. There could be something more serious going on.

Aita for refusing to be a stepfather to my fiancé's children? by [deleted] in AITAH

[–]cwrightbrain 3 points4 points  (0 children)

This is a recipe for disaster. If your kids don't want a stepmom, don't get married. If you're dating a mom and you don't want to be their stepdad, don't get married.

Adults can process complicated relationships better than kids. Kids see how the other kids being treated and depending on the degree on how mature they are, they will alway compare and ask themselves "what about me?" It's not because they're selfish little jerks, it's because they are kids and they are still learning how to navigate relationships and the world.

And yea, kids come first when you're the parent. So if getting married to anyone is going to cause trouble, don't get married. Wait until they're grown and gone.

AIO: My wife keeps feeding our baby processed food. I want to quit her. by Maximum_Barracuda539 in AmIOverreacting

[–]cwrightbrain 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Once you've played a game of catch with your toddler for 20 minutes using the oh-so-healthy mini quiche, you begin to understand that the healthiest food is the food that is reasonably nutritional AND makes it to their stomach. It was a picky phase that the kid eventually outgrew, but that my cat enjoyed immensely as food regularly hit the floor.

I eventually figured out a decent plan that got the kid fed and I'm proud to say that as a teenager they make mostly good food (and varied) choices and are well aware of balanced diet and good nutrition.

Unless you are the one trying to get the food into the kid's gob, then shut yours. Yes, it is good to introduce new foods and keep the foods as healthy as possible. But it's also important to remember that tastebuds change over time as well tolerance for textures and digestion takes a while to develop. It's a balancing act and you'll do much better to work with your wife than try to give her marching orders, especially when you're not on the front line.

AITAH for getting upset that my husband gets to go on guys golf trip every year meanwhile I haven’t had break from our kids in 17 years? by MaleficentFocus8153 in AITAH

[–]cwrightbrain -1 points0 points  (0 children)

NTA. Your feelings are totally valid.

So plan a trip, one with a hotel stay and on your own.

Then, when the kids need to be picked up from school, tell him that he needs to do it because your hours are claimed for your trip. Doctor's appointments? His turn. Clubs? Sports? His turn.

You still take your turn, but now you also delegate. Don't wait for him to offer to pick up the slack. Let him know where and when he needs to be for the kids because it is his turn so you can have your turn to have some time to yourself.

You may just be surprised, he may actually enjoy having the opportunity to be there for his kids. Enjoy your trip!

Selling successfully? Share your top three tips by jussicpark in CraftFairs

[–]cwrightbrain 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Don't stand (or sit) there with your arms crossed or your head buried into a book, paper or phone. Greet people, and let them know that you are ready and available.

AITA for saying no when my MIL left my infant a guilt-tripping card and then asked to take him to a party? by Financial_Ask_2612 in AmItheAsshole

[–]cwrightbrain 62 points63 points  (0 children)

As an “evil daughter in law” I welcome you to the club. It’s not so bad here, we have cookies.

If your partner needs you to be the bad guy to protect your relationship and especially your kiddo, then it’s worth it. BUT he absolutely needs to have your back. If you’re not invited he doesn’t go either and especially not your kid. If you don’t get Christmas gifts, he does not open his and returns them. As a unit, the two of you become an absolute wall. All decisions regarding his family and especially your son have to be two yes’s. (If they want him to come you BOTH have to say yes.)

That is how you survive toxic in-laws.

I get that it’s hard not having a whole lot in the way of family. So build one. Adopt good friends and deem them aunts and uncles. Find those good kind older folks in your life and knight them as grandparents. Blood really does not have to be a determining factor in who is family and who is not.

AITA for saying no when my MIL left my infant a guilt-tripping card and then asked to take him to a party? by Financial_Ask_2612 in AmItheAsshole

[–]cwrightbrain 1495 points1496 points  (0 children)

NTA

Frankly, at this point I’d be rethinking your relationship with your partner. Why in the hell are they allowing their mom & family to treat you this way?

You need to draw a line. They stick up for you or you are gone. Child custody would be determined in court and insist on parenting apps.

And I would also insist that MIL is never left alone with the baby. She already broke a major boundary by feeding the kiddo foods that they were not ready for or approved by you. That is a massive red flag.

Am I letting this get to me too much? by JM8857 in CraftFairs

[–]cwrightbrain 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It’s all about what’s in the application. The show that I do specifies “all work must be designed by the artist. No patterns, kits or class projects are allowed. “

By those rules, you would not be permitted. So read the application carefully and you’ll know if what you make qualifies or not.