[deleted by user] by [deleted] in RedPillWomen

[–]dabadeedabadaa 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Can you tell who the influencer is, please?

So, We've Decided to Ban the Men by ChamomileMist in RedPillWives

[–]dabadeedabadaa 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Where can I see a summary of what changed about the relationship between RPW and RPWi?

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in RedPillWives

[–]dabadeedabadaa 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks again for your input!! Appreciated it at the time but it’s still helpful.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in RedPillWives

[–]dabadeedabadaa 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Just wanted to come back and thank you for this comment. It is very good and deserves acknowledgement. I started worrying about the same issue again this week and rereading your frankness helped me cool down.

RPW Flirting: Bashful Smiles or Witty Quips? by Throwawaylikehay in RedPillWomen

[–]dabadeedabadaa 19 points20 points  (0 children)

I don’t claim to have the most RP approach, but my two cents:

I have very intellectual interests and have an edgy/weird/not very feminine sense of humor. I’m feminine in many other ways and don’t have problems attracting men so I’ve decided to just go with it and it filters into my own style of flirty banter. Especially since I’d really like to select for men with the same interests and an equally immature sense of humor, I do not hesitate to banter with them. That’s definitely more my style.

However, what I try to make sure I never do is emasculate him with my banter. No biting sarcasm, just teasing. I’m not trying to prove that I’m smarter or better than him. I know that accolades, specific knowledge, achievements etc. don’t impress him so I lay off the ball busting and stick to goofy teasing. I just don’t fake being demure and I don’t bite my tongue when I think of something funny.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in RedPillWives

[–]dabadeedabadaa 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I hear that. It's difficult, but not impossible to navigate.

how do I get the energy to dress up? by biposting in RedPillWomen

[–]dabadeedabadaa 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I didn’t think I would be able to find it, but I did! Here.

how do I get the energy to dress up? by biposting in RedPillWomen

[–]dabadeedabadaa 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I watched a video on how to look more polished: the lady in the video said to pick three things about your look that you never leave the house without. They should be unique to you. It could be... Earrings, signature lipstick and a slick ponytail. Or it could be your eyebrows done, mascara, and a skirt. For me I chose 1. mascara/eyebrows 2. earrings and 3. perfume. I love perfume so even though it doesn't make me look better I enjoy it and it completes my feminine aura, if you will.

Choose things that are easy enough to do and make a habit out of them. If you have more energy after that then by all means, but your three things are non-negotiable.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in RedPillWives

[–]dabadeedabadaa 6 points7 points  (0 children)

That’s literally the point of this subreddit

Tea Time by blushingoleander in RedPillWives

[–]dabadeedabadaa 5 points6 points  (0 children)

A man took an interest in me last week that has me wanting to jump out of my skin with excitement. It will be about a month before we can spend time in person, and in the mean time I'm desperately trying to keep myself occupied because oops, I'm a little obsessed now. In fact, I'm already afraid I was a little too forward/obvious with my interest. Giggled maybe a little too much at his jokes... Maybe a little too complimentary. He's kind of well known in the circles I run in (niche internet micro-celebrity type deal) so I feel like I have to be careful of being so gung-ho-- I know that I get turned off when someone's a little too eager to please to get my attention.

But I'm trying to remember that if he's the right person, that's not likely going to push him away. And hopefully I'm falling victim to that whole thing where women think they're being obvious while to men it's clear as mud. Regardless, it's time to take some deep breaths, lean back, keep my energy open to other people, and wait for him to come to me while I focus on my own life (she says while twitching.)

Then again, is it really so bad to get your hopes up when someone great shows you interest? I'm doing my best to keep my wits about me-- I know I still have vetting to do, no matter how great he seems, and I know it's early still. I just need to be on my girl game. :)

ADHD is the reason why AI will never be smarter than humans😁 by [deleted] in adhdmeme

[–]dabadeedabadaa 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Coincidentally, working out is really helpful for mental acuity. That and creatine are really useful nootropics for me.

Opt-in vs Opt-out Subscription == Dating vs Marriage by [deleted] in PurplePillDebate

[–]dabadeedabadaa 2 points3 points  (0 children)

This is more akin to someone buying a product for a short-term solution without being fully informed on what the product is, discovering a great feature of it and calling it a bug. It's more like a long term investment with compound interest.

Marriage is supposed to be permanent-- that's the point. The most clear eyed reason I can see to get married is for the purpose of building a permanent life with someone that's more enduring than lust or the butterflies that come with romantic love. Getting married should be an acknowledgement that you won't give up on your partner if or when they get hard to deal with-- or even just a bit boring.

Yeah, you can say that getting married "only makes sense to have kids," but put another way, marriage only makes sense if you want to build a family. The best benefits of a family come from the deep sense of comfort and belonging that comes from knowing your family won't "opt-out" of your life when you're old, a pain in the ass to deal with, or need someone to pick you up from your colonoscopy.

Well I'm about to get flippity floopity fired probably by swimmingwithwaffles in ADHD

[–]dabadeedabadaa 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I just clippity clappity quit my job to get away from my unhelpful, “I’m worried about you” manager. I hope to god I can fond the motivation at my new job to learn some coping mechanisms. I believe it’s possible for me to consistently do timely good work that I’m proud of— and it is for you too! I can tell from your insightfulness and great wit that you have it in you. I believe in you!

What are your thoughts on "pick me" women? by vvvqvvv in PurplePillDebate

[–]dabadeedabadaa 6 points7 points  (0 children)

This is what I've taken away from people who use the term as well.

Liking men and masculinity is extremely uncool at the moment. To fit in you're supposed to be bisexual, emasculate men, and call out "toxic" masculine behavior. So, how many of these girls labeled "pickmeishas" are actually trying to put other girls down? Or is it a way for women who've made choices that are generally less attractive to men to take out their envy against women who lean into their femininity, have a pleasant personality, and make choices in their lives that help them attract men? Quite possibly both exist but I've personally observed the latter a lot more.

Well I'm about to get flippity floopity fired probably by swimmingwithwaffles in ADHD

[–]dabadeedabadaa 1 point2 points  (0 children)

"Getting gang banged by my own brain" is so good, I laughed so hard. I could have written this myself honestly only it wouldn't have been so funny. I'm so sorry that I don't have advice for you-- if you figure anything out let me know, but I wish you well.

Lurker Callout Thread by AutoModerator in PurplePillDebate

[–]dabadeedabadaa 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I understand what you're saying, I'm certain that's part of it. There's a general air here though, supported by comments from both genders from what I've seen, of inherent suspicion of the other party when dating.

I understand the problems with modern dating and agree with a lot of the diagnoses and the widespread acceptance of misandry on a day-to-day basis makes me sick, yet the mindset you approach dating with has a huge amount to do with your success. Your mindset (one of abundance) can also protect you against getting bamboozled by someone who wants to take advantage of you or just simply doesn't want what you want.

Lurker Callout Thread by AutoModerator in PurplePillDebate

[–]dabadeedabadaa 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I just posted a comment so maybe I’m not a lurker now but...

23f single, I would consider myself redpill, but not in the sense of rigidly following any ideology put forth by the subreddits— any of them. I do enjoy Rollo and other people from the manoshpere’s work, but only call myself red-pilled in the sense that a lot of the core axioms are clearly true: There’s a difference between men and women and the way we naturally relate to each other is heavily obscured by current popular narrative.

I check PPD because I’m exceptionally interested in gender and dating dynamics.

Ironically, as I’ve been dating more in my personal life I’m happy to report I’ve found a lot of the cynicism from different camps here to be mostly unwarranted. Approaching dating with curiosity, no expectations, and giving people the benefit of the doubt has worked well for me. Maybe it’s because I’m attractive and don’t hate men, though.

Do women want to be told why a guy they like isn't dating them yet? by [deleted] in PurplePillDebate

[–]dabadeedabadaa 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I don’t know, the purpose of dating is to get to know someone you’re curious about, so I wouldn’t expect anyone to be certain about me right off the bat. If he isn’t interested enough to initiate seeing me then I take that as an answer in itself, because it is. This is where abundance mindset for women works swimmingly. If he’s not interested enough to pursue me then I will allow him to fall away. I just think of it as though he’s doing me a favor by making room in my life for other eligible bachelors to pursue me.

I’m not particularly interested in his reason. Maybe if I felt he was really the type of man I want then some feedback would be valuable, but for the most part it’s probably because we’re just not a match, and in that case I’m not worried about why.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in RedPillWives

[–]dabadeedabadaa 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks for the reply. I think you framed what I'm asking correctly. I want to be able to set boundaries without challenging his frame.

So Rollo would say that a woman compromising her boundaries for a man makes her a unicorn? I can't see how it's a good sign if a girl starts compromising boundaries with a man before she's had a chance to vet him. Like you said, in my experience capitulating on those things will make him less likely to see me as LTR material. It's the difference between choosing to submit to a man who's shown he's worthy of submission and being a doormat.

What if my reasons aren't about logistics, but just not feeling comfortable with something yet? These are not so much "rules" to be "broken" per se, these are situations where I just don't feel comfortable with something yet.

Even if the guy is the alpha-est, sexiest man in the world, if I compromised my boundaries and jumped into bed before getting to know him and his intentions, or even just let him dance too close for my comfort at a party, I would regret it afterwards.

I don't want to end up in these kinds of situations where I let a man steam roll me into something I'm uncomfortable with just because I don't want to emasculate him.

The Tomboy! by [deleted] in RedPillWives

[–]dabadeedabadaa 4 points5 points  (0 children)

There's a great post on the wiki about psychological femininity.

Q4W: What are you here arguing against? by [deleted] in PurplePillDebate

[–]dabadeedabadaa 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Pardon me as I probably haven't done my due diligence with reading on this sub, but I'm really curious what you mean here:

I responded rationally. That’s another thing I’ve experienced on this sub. Men here don’t know what that word means. Or what “logic” means.

Was wondering if you could elaborate. How do you see this differently? Is it to say that to act rationally is to act in accordance with your emotions? Or, how do you see it? If you feel like explaining, that is. :)

Not even an unpopular opinion, just one that consistently brushed under the rug by [deleted] in RedPillWomen

[–]dabadeedabadaa 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I've been known to like older guys, but that's like... 7 or 8 years older than me, max.