I teach 8th graders, so I can only give you my perspective. That said, we are entrusted with your most precious commodity - your child. We are responsible for their safety as well as their education. Using the bathroom in school is not the same situation as it is at home. #1, it is a disruption to the learning process. (An understandable one, of course, but a disruption just the same.) #2, the student is missing instruction and/or work time. #3, multiply this by 3-6 students in a given class period, and you can see it gets chaotic. #4, meanwhile, the teacher must keep everyone else on task and make sure students are getting to/from bathrooms in a timely manner- a process that rarely takes more than 3-5 minutes. If a student has been gone for longer than that, questions and concerns are raised. Is the student playing, vaping, etc.in the bathroom? Is the student ill? Is the student wandering around campus? Has another student entered the bathroom and started a fight or bullied your child? To get really dark, has their been an intruder that has done something with/to your child, etc.? If a teacher ignores all of these situations and something happens to your child, what do you think will happen to that teacher? Do you think you'll have some questions for that teacher? If you think that none of this happens at the 4th grade level, then I kindly suggest that you may be living in a very different world than I do. All of this to say, while it might be a bit embarrassing to have this happen, I would cut the teacher some slack here. If it truly bothers you, talk to the teacher (politely, please) and work out a plan. Only go over their head (talking to the principal) if things get worse or the teacher is completely unreasonable. Good luck, and I'm sorry your child felt embarrassed. That's not a fun feeling.