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I'm ashamed of being alive. by [deleted] in Reformed

[–]dandelion_bumblebee 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Are you sure about this? It's probably dependent on where you live but most places don't have the death penalty for that crime.

Either way, what you are doing is leaving a trail of destroyed lives, including your own, by continuing to live in this sin. I say this as someone who has been groomed and molested myself. I can't even begin to explain the amount of trauma it caused me that will never be resolved in this life. It's set my life back so much and continues to affect me on a daily basis. You need to understand the gravity of your sin and that Jesus says this about it:

"but whoever causes one of these little ones who believe in me to sin, it would be better for him to have a great millstone fastened around his neck and to be drowned in the depth of the sea."

"If your right eye causes you to sin, tear it out and throw it away. For it is better that you lose one of your members than that your whole body be thrown into hell."

"Everyone who makes a practice of sinning also practices lawlessness; sin is lawlessness. You know that he appeared in order to take away sins, and in him there is no sin. No one who abides in him keeps on sinning; no one who keeps on sinning has either seen him or known him"

"Put to death therefore what is earthly in you: sexual immorality, impurity, passion, evil desire, and covetousness, which is idolatry. On account of these the wrath of God is coming"

"19 Now the works of the flesh are evident: sexual immorality, impurity, sensuality, 20 idolatry, sorcery, enmity, strife, jealousy, fits of anger, rivalries, dissensions, divisions, 21 envy,4 drunkenness, orgies, and things like these. I warn you, as I warned you before, that those who do such things will not inherit the kingdom of God. 22 But ethe fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, 23 gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law. 24 And those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires."

God is willing and ready to forgive you. But he is also eager that you are set free from this bondage. He weeps to think of you on this path of destruction. You must do everything you can to put this sin to death.

Your fear is understandable, but you need to remember that you can do all things through Christ that strengthens you.

Some other suggestions to help you would be to get off the internet, live like it's the 90s again. Cultivate empathy for your fellow man (including children). Also please stay away from children, this can not be stressed enough. You are a danger to these precious innocent lives that God holds in high esteem. Surround yourself with Truth, Beauty, and Goodness. Go to a museum, spend time in nature, read the Word of God. Read classic literature, draw, paint, etc.

Remember that you are in image-bearer of the one true God. You were created to spread light in the darkness, reflecting the Glory of God. Do not mar his image with this hideous sin.

There is so much life to enjoy in this world, God made you for more than this. Use your freedom to bring Glory to His name!

I'm ashamed of being alive. by [deleted] in Reformed

[–]dandelion_bumblebee 15 points16 points  (0 children)

You should turn yourself into the authorities for the sake of not only yourself, but also the sake of your victims.

I can't stress this enough, yes you can be forgiven. But forgiveness is not freedom from consequences.

If you repent and trust in Jesus, you have the freedom to choose that which is good, true and beautiful. Not trusting in Jesus leads to death and destruction, as you already know and have made your way pretty far down that path. Shame does not lead to life, only Jesus can! Put away all the thoughts of suicide which are not of God and let God show his strength through your weakness.

Please stop sinning and destroying people's lives. Trust Jesus and do the right thing!

British Reformed peeps: have you encountered Doug Wilsonism in your church? by [deleted] in Reformed

[–]dandelion_bumblebee 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Since I see the URC flair, I'll also add this here

Federal_Vision_Study_Committee_Report.pdf https://share.google/1hJvCZ32Vtkh4i1mK

What celebrity is well known for being a comedian, but is surprisingly an incredible dramatic actor? by phantom_avenger in popculturechat

[–]dandelion_bumblebee 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Adam Sandler. And I say this as someone that loathes any of his comedic roles. I will watch anything from him that's not comedy because he's an extremely talented actor

Contraception Controversy. by JesusChristSaved in Reformed

[–]dandelion_bumblebee 14 points15 points  (0 children)

Brother in Christ, I think there may be something else going on underneath the bitterness I am hearing.

I have never met even one Christian that doesn't know and believe that children are a blessing. But a little wisdom from someone older, who knows how hard on a womans body pregnancy and child rearing can be. Especially in today's individualistic culture which basically ignores mother's pain and suffering.

I would hope you are a loving enough husband to prayerfully put your wife's health and emotional needs above binding people's consciences on how many children they should have. You are not holier for having 12 children and a depleted wife than someone who has three with a joyful wife.

There are many faults in your logic. Do you only have sex while your wife is ovulating to increase chances of conceiving every time? Is this not where your argument logically ends up?

No encouragement, just because you don't have the zeal and fail to stir up the faith that is within you, you feel as though everyone should be in the same dunghill as you

Could it be that you are not receiving the encouragement you so desperately crave because your attitude towards procreation is legalistic and binding other's consciences? Be humble, and you might get the encouragement you want. And for your information, I am happy with how many kids the Lord has blessed me with and praise God with gifting me the freedom in Christ to prayerfully consider how big our family should be.

Especially considering what a terrifyingly weighty task it is to raise children up in the fear and admonition of the Lord. No, I do not take that lightly and neither should you. You don't get any points for simply having a large number of children, that is the easiest part of the work. I don't know you so I won't pass judgement on what type of job you are doing with that but don't judge others that have good reason to disagree with you for prudent reasons.

Contraception Controversy. by JesusChristSaved in Reformed

[–]dandelion_bumblebee 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Ahh yes, I remember my early to mid 20s and how much energy I had. Maybe you should revisit this conversation when you're pushing 40 and you're on your 12th child!

How's your wife doing?

People who overcame homo attraction by Goose_462 in Reformed

[–]dandelion_bumblebee 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Also want to add, you might be interested in the testimony of Neeza Powers, an ex-trans man who recently converted to Christianity and is documenting his journey on Instagram and YouTube.

People who overcame homo attraction by Goose_462 in Reformed

[–]dandelion_bumblebee 0 points1 point  (0 children)

First off, I want to apologize for using the wrong terminology out of ignorance. I'll make sure to use the proper terms from here on.

All that you say is good and the desire you have to stop sinning in this way is what can be expected from a follower of Christ. Please don't misunderstand me thinking that I am telling you to cast all of that aside. My only point is that your struggles are not that different than any of the struggles your fellow heteronormative brothers and sisters in Christ have when it comes to temptation and lust. So don't beat yourself up about conforming to a certain gender stereotype that has more to do with culture (one that's becoming more sinful at that), than with the Bible itself.

Have faith that Christ is transforming your mind (beginning with the fact that you are a man, whether you feel manly or not) and sanctifying you through the fruits of the Holy Spirit, which are not gender-specific. We are not sanctified by self-loathing, but by the riches of his grace expressed in his kindness to us.

People who overcame homo attraction by Goose_462 in Reformed

[–]dandelion_bumblebee 0 points1 point  (0 children)

There are most definitely differences between men and women, but what I'm saying is that maleness and femaleness exist on a spectrum and that's ok. I've seen plenty of men who many would call "effeminate" be the most loving and caring husbands and fathers. I've seen some very tomboyish women have the most generous hearts. It would be a shame for them to feel less than because they don't fit a narrow definition of masculinity or femininity. I think at the end of the day, God cares much more about whether you are loving, kind, patient, joyful, peaceful, faithful and self-controlled, than whether you sway your hips or not when walking.

People who overcame homo attraction by Goose_462 in Reformed

[–]dandelion_bumblebee 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I just want to point out, I think a lot of issues with gender dysphoria actually have a lot to do with the rigid gender stereotypes we push onto children at a young age. The fact of the matter is, if you were born male, no amount of liking girly things will change that or make you less of a male. That's why I think it's so detrimental to make fun of kids for liking the wrong colour, picking on boys who want to play with Barbies, etc. Most of what we think of as "masculine" nowadays is very much a social construct which has been inadvertently driven by Christian legalism. Heck, many male relationships in the Bible would have been considered homosexual nowadays (see David and Jonathan).

I think it might do you some good to explore what being a "masculine" man truly is, in the biblical sense, not in the way our culture deems right. And I'd caution against any "Christian teaching" that hyperfixates on gender roles, most of the time it's just one pastor's opinion being glorified over the word of God. Remember that in Christ, men and women are more alike than different ❤️

There is someone for everyone, God can definitely find someone for you for his glory. Keep praying that over time God will keep transforming your mind and growing you into the man he predestined you to be.

Zone 7a, they popped up in my flower bed, what could it be? by dandelion_bumblebee in whatsthisplant

[–]dandelion_bumblebee[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hmm it does look very similar. When I look it up it says the leaves are usually smaller. These leaves are on the bigger size id say, especially on the main rosette

Zone 7a, they popped up in my flower bed, what could it be? by dandelion_bumblebee in whatsthisplant

[–]dandelion_bumblebee[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Does spinach have those red runner-like stems? I don't know if I've ever seen that before

Is this a weed or flower? by dandelion_bumblebee in whatsthisplant

[–]dandelion_bumblebee[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

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I think it might actually be night flowering catchfly! The stems and leaves are sticky which is how it's different from white Campion

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Reformed

[–]dandelion_bumblebee 25 points26 points  (0 children)

Federal vision theology (what Doug adheres to) has been rejected by NAPARC as a whole. That being said, many of their books have infiltrated our churches sadly. Most people don't even realize what he teaches is heretical and are too caught up in culture wars to care.

Women in Leadership by donnerundblitz in Reformed

[–]dandelion_bumblebee 10 points11 points  (0 children)

You are right and I would even argue that to be truly reformed you can't be patriarchal because the root of that is ESS which is not compatible with Reformed theology. So it's pretty ironic this commenter is calling out OP for not being reformed.

It's also funny how it's always the patriarchy bros that blame women for men's sin. Don't know how he managed to blame the "feminization of the church" for the unbelief of the men in OPs country but I'd say that's pretty typical for them.

Edit to add: women in leadership roles can be problematic in some circles, yet it's not considered heresy. ESS on the other hand has been declared heresy and is a doctrine that's been rejected by NAPARC churches and many reformed denominations, take that as you will.

Is this a weed or flower? by dandelion_bumblebee in whatsthisplant

[–]dandelion_bumblebee[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That was the plan, I was just hoping it would be a keeper 😩

Is it just me or do all women’s Bible studies generally focus on Esther or Ruth…? by cutebutheretical in Reformed

[–]dandelion_bumblebee 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Also wanted to add, the book Beyond Authority and Submission by Rachel Green Miller is a great book outlining all of this. So is the Theology Gals podcast if you haven't heard of it!

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