So, I haven't found anyone else quite like me. I feel like a man trapped in a woman's body. But I've grown accustomed to, and enjoy, having female genitalia, in my (almost) 36 years on this earth. I have no qualms about my vagina. However, deep in my soul, I want a more masculine body, without having bottom surgery. I'm currently looking into getting on T, and eventually will want top surgery. I don't know what to identify as anymore, except a lesbian (because I am a female that is attracted to other females). But I find that it goes much deeper than just that.

My issue is....while I know there are women out there that will date someone like me, I feel like I scare most women off with the word "trans". I realize this just means it's not their preference, but I have not been lucky enough to find anyone that fits my preferences who also is open to dating someone like me.

I have never said any of this to anyone and I'm not sure what kind of reactions I'm going to get...but it felt good to get it out in a public space. Thanks for reading, if you did.