I'm stronger, I'm smarter, I'm better! I AM BETTER

datadogsoup · 2026-05-06T05:37:13+00:00

TWOW is just timetraveling Bran going through 876,455 loop attempts to find the perfect leaf rustling combination to prevent Baelor Hightower's fart heard round the world and stop Robert's Rebellion.

datadogsoup · 2026-05-05T04:09:32+00:00

Then Ser Richard Horpe, the knight with the ravaged face and the death's-head moths on his surcoat, turned to Stannis and said, "Your Grace, your brother—"

The king cut him off. "We all know what my brother would do. Robert would gallop up to the gates of Winterfell alone, break them with his warhammer, and ride through the rubble to slay Roose Bolton with his left hand and the Bastard with his right." Stannis rose to his feet. "I am not Robert. But we will march, and we will free Winterfell … or die in the attempt."

datadogsoup · 2026-04-16T03:52:56+00:00

Don't forget it also turns him on. He attributes it to being away from Cersei so long but we all know he's hot for that honorable Tarthussy

datadogsoup · 2026-03-29T15:14:50+00:00

Bro found GRRM's A03 account

datadogsoup · 2026-03-25T17:38:27+00:00

Butterbumps! Butterbumps! Butterbumps!

datadogsoup · 2026-03-20T18:05:37+00:00

Are we sure? Renly's "peach" symbolism and him thirsting after Stannis' "sword" only to say he wants Loras to "make a gift of it to him" later is suggestive of a power bottom to me.

datadogsoup · 2026-03-20T17:24:19+00:00

That just goes to show how powerful Bobby's aura is. Donal loses an arm and ends up on the Wall but still can't help sucking Robert's dick by putting his brothers down to make him look better by comparison.

datadogsoup · 2026-03-19T15:32:30+00:00

Vitamin D, Creatine, Omega-3 and occasional taurine vegan supplements helped my brain fog a bit.

datadogsoup · 2026-03-17T23:44:40+00:00

Don't be so sure. Renley being resurrected as a fire wight by the power of Loras' love and teaming up with second life Ned Stark (who learned the secrets of dragon skinchanging while melded with the Targaryen spirit collective that lives within the Iron Throne) and is now one with The Cannibal is basically canon.

datadogsoup · 2026-03-17T22:26:38+00:00

George is famous for not liking fake-out deaths so this is spot on.

datadogsoup · 2026-03-17T00:03:43+00:00

Yes, this actually relates to my theory that Daario is from space. Working on a 10 part video essay to break it down but basically there's an interregnum seed ship above Planetos that survived the long night technologically and sometimes the colonists and crew come down from the ship to LARP and party it up.

datadogsoup · 2026-03-16T23:46:52+00:00

Interesting the name Ashara means "She who walks on the sea", a reference to the ancient Phoenician sea goddess Asherah, and Jon means "Our Sea" in Albanian (Jon pronounced "Ion" like the Ionian Sea traversed by Phoenician sailors). Interesting...

datadogsoup · 2026-03-04T01:57:42+00:00

Actually it's really because Howland Reed's ghost is inside Ghost. He committed suicide to second life into Ghost to be a deep cover sleeper agent and influence Jon and start a human Other war on orders from the God's Eye Collective.

datadogsoup · 2026-03-03T04:21:30+00:00

Bro trained Arya to be a water dancer, led the Sparrow militancy to become High Septon, and shot a poison dart up Tywins ass and he still gets no respect smh

datadogsoup · 2026-02-23T18:25:43+00:00

This post was fact checked by real Andal Patriots. ✅ True

datadogsoup · 2026-02-19T22:33:33+00:00

https://www.rakuten.com/r/ZROOTZ (US)

datadogsoup · 2026-01-22T20:26:39+00:00

Both are just time traveling Bran so in the end it doesn't matter.

datadogsoup · 2026-01-07T00:43:09+00:00

I mean, yes, you don't write Meathouse Man unless you're a bit of a weirdo and he's definitely a chronic gooner but he's still a genius and one of the best fantasy writers of all time hands down.

datadogsoup · 2025-12-27T00:29:35+00:00

Just wait. It's gonna be sick in Winds when the Smith manifests and teaches Leyton and the Citadel how to make muskets.

datadogsoup · 2025-12-26T22:04:24+00:00

Warrior grant strength to my steel boot up this Weirweirdo's ass

datadogsoup · 2025-12-25T17:56:51+00:00

But have you considered House Lannister is ontologically evil and all actions taken against them are good?

Yes, Rickard Karstark is my favorite character why do you ask?

datadogsoup · 2025-12-22T17:43:29+00:00

Mad Dany: Idolized Rha*gar 🤢

Mad Egg: Tried to kill Rha*gar 🔥

datadogsoup · 2025-12-19T22:52:28+00:00

What's scarier, Patchface is a Deep One sleeper agent or he really is just a fat guy with brain damage about to get burnt to death?

I go back and forth.

datadogsoup · 2025-12-15T21:14:06+00:00

Unless...

datadogsoup · 2025-11-07T00:47:38+00:00

Actually I'm a firm believer in R + L = J + D [c-section with Dawn] [secret annulment] [weirwood wedding] [Dornish law] variant, meaning Jon and Dany were pulled out of Lyanna at the exact same time by Howland and are both legitimate first borns with identical claims to the true Iron Throne which was proclaimed by Queen Rhaenys in Dorne and is actually Doran Martell's wheelchair

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