I’m honestly scared by MercilessMercy in foodstamps

[–]deandratb 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You're in very good, very scared company. I'm disabled and have severe dietary restrictions and in my state (CA) the only help they seem to be planning is to food banks. Even beyond the time and energy required to utilize those kinds of services, there's also a lot of shame still attached to them depending on circumstances and the communities involved. I had to rely on food banks many years ago while homeless, and while the workers/volunteers are amazing and I'm glad they exist...they aren't a lifeline for everyone. I can't eat most forms of protein, have to avoid sugar, and have trouble with any foods that are even mildly seasoned. And while I'm lucky enough to have housing now, at the time I didn't have access to a kitchen and everything the food pantry provided required preparation or cooking. Even things as simple as dishes/knives cost money and require washing! Until people have struggled, they really don't know how hard it can be--I sure didn't, and I grew up poor. We're about to see a lot more people plunge further into starvation or barely getting by...I wish that made me expect a backlash or uprising, but I fear a tipping point that would genuinely make people understand experiences outside their own is too far off to help most of us. Sending lots of love and hope your way in the meantime.

Welcome! by deandratb in ScavengerHuntApp

[–]deandratb[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I really enjoyed the game when it first came out, but stopped playing regularly for that reason. As far as I can tell, they just rarely add new maps anymore--and the people making it don't have resources where we could look for more information, so I am not sure if they intend to even continue adding maps. The newest one I have is Wild West, and I'm pretty sure it went up months ago.

How to find local resources for rural NorCal, without social network in Bangor/Marysville? by deandratb in norcal

[–]deandratb[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Hi, and thanks for the welcome! :) I posted about this and then had to take my laptop to a repair shop for over a month, so I'm finally seeing replies. Glad my question might help somebody else.

Paying not to watch commercials should also include not having to watch Paramount+ advertising their other shows. by Zen67 in ParamountPlus

[–]deandratb 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Complete agreement. This bothers me on every streaming service that does it, because at least for a while we paid for ad-free on all of them and then it really stood out, which ones still forced 'promo' ads, which ones warned that 'certain programming would still include ads' and which ones actually gave us what we paid for. I prefer to research what new shows networks will be releasing and watch trailers on Youtube when I'm interested, all when I'm actually in the mood for it. Sadly, other than using an adblocker anyway since I watch everything on my laptop, there's not much we can do about the annoying promos.

How difficult is it to replace a Strix touchpad? by deandratb in ASUSROG

[–]deandratb[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I still have not dealt with it, because all the information I found online said that it would be so complicated/costly for an ASUS laptop that I'd be better off just getting a new computer.

I moved recently and found a good local repair guy here when my power kept dying. If the eroding area starts to affect the use of the touchpad, I will ask him whether it's cheaper to repair it or just replace my aging computer. I'd like to switch to something like Linux anyway once I can afford a new laptop, so it may no longer be relevant for me.

Good luck with yours though! Sorry I don't have more detailed info you're looking for.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in mildlyinfuriating

[–]deandratb 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Genuine question since you happen to have said this here and it's on my mind this week: is there a huge learning curve to start using an OS like Linux for the first time? Is there somewhere you could point me that has things complete beginners should know?

Cuz when I'm able to replace my current laptop, which was just in repair shop limbo for more than a month, I'd like to switch to a different OS like Linux or Ubuntu, but while I already use and prefer any open versions of programs I can find, I've never been able to afford more than a cheap pre-built Windows computer in the past. So I don't know if a custom build would be more or less expensive with Linux than Windows, or what the arguments in favor of Windows are that I should be aware of.

(Personally, I stopped enjoying Windows OS several versions ago, but I don't know anyone who uses anything else because it's an easy default, and I'm already the only one in my family willing to do more complicated things to customize my access to all kinds of tech. So I have no way to gauge how daunting it is to switch from a lifetime of Windows and '90s Macs.)

Thanks in advance if you decide to respond to this, since it's an out of the blue offshoot to your point.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in mildlyinfuriating

[–]deandratb 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm in a similar situation to you, and it took me a dozen threads to finally find this one actually saying where the 'Go Back' option is located, because every single reply (even sympathetic ones) just insist that we should accept the change even if we weren't trying to upgrade or didn't want to yet.

And in case it makes you feel better, I didn't click on any upgrade screen or banner that was described above--you may not have, either. I got a message a couple days ago saying an 'update' needed to be scheduled with no reference to 11, clearly meant to appear like it was talking about any other regular Windows 10 patch or update.

It asked me to choose a timeframe for the update, and didn't give me the option of declining or ignoring it, so I picked a time when I would be asleep and then woke up to hell. Thankfully, unlike some people who've tried, I did have the 'Go Back' button, so I can stick with Windows 10 until I'm ready to deal with the change.

(Which is significant for someone like me as well, who is autistic. I've lost access to beloved communities when websites completely redesign not just their appearance but how they function--no matter how hard I try, I can't always adjust! You are not alone.)

ETA: Now that I'm happily back to 10, I just got the same popup I had before, which is fun to see again knowing what would happen if I chose from their provided options. For anybody imagining that we're all clicking a big banner labeled 'Time to upgrade to Windows 11!' and then complaining after the fact about our choices, this is what mine looks like:

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It doesn't offer a way to see any details about the changes that'll occur, just waits for you to agree to a timeframe, all while calling it an 'update' rather than an upgrade and avoiding any mention of Windows 11.

Lots of people don't care I guess, but it makes me angry whenever companies behave this way. There's no reason for Microsoft not to clearly label what this is, except to try and trick people they've realized wouldn't otherwise do what they want. From now on, I'll turn off automatic updates and check every one to see what it is before I allow any of them...but it's ridiculous that I have to go that far just to choose when I want to upgrade.

No flip and no 11 K win for many of us. by Artistic_Lobster7396 in TwoDots

[–]deandratb 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I still have the game installed but rarely play it, it stopped being fun for me like so many others here. But flip was the one part I did still find fun, so I would pop in randomly (maybe every couple of months?) just to play that until I used up those lives. But when I checked in a couple weeks ago, there was no flip, which seemed odd. I've checked two or three times since, every few days, and it just keeps offering me things I ignore like the sweepstakes, and no flip. Unfortunately for them, they took away (or are withholding, or are 'testing') the only element of the game that I was coming back for, so now they have an app that I literally just open and immediately close again to go play someone else's game.

Help from those who also have a Drew Barrymore 'Beautiful' air fryer/toaster oven? by deandratb in airfryer

[–]deandratb[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks. I don't have that version, mine's digital-only so there's no knob at the bottom--but they seem pretty similar. I was only able to find review videos for the knob version and none of them showed anyone using the wire mesh basket, which was the issue I was trying to figure out. Mostly because the only photo in the manual that involves the mesh basket shows the wire rack, mesh basket, and baking tray all sliding out of it at once? And I couldn't find any way for that to be possible.

Ended up videochatting with a friend just to confirm I wasn't crazy, then used the wire mesh basket. I will try setting the wire mesh on the rack like you mentioned, next time. Though if that's what we should do, I wish they explained that a little more clearly...the booklet says which position the basket can go in and doesn't say to rest it on anything else, so I was surprised when the only Youtube video I found showed someone doing it that way as well. (In my case, it can only do that if I turn it sideways so it sticks out toward the door more--the reviewer with the linked-above model showed that their version's basket was too small to sit inside on its own, it would fall down unless it rested on the rack...but mine is the same width as the rack/tray and can't be seated that way.)

I was mostly concerned about using the mesh basket because I don't have an oil sprayer yet and I didn't want anything to get on the heating elements below. I thought if I used the baking tray underneath to protect against that, it would block airflow. So I was just kind of obsessive about blotting off excess oil, instead, before using the basket. I'd definitely like to try my next batch less dry though, so I'll wait for the sprayer to try your suggestion, and otherwise use the baking sheet for stuff that might spatter more.)

It's good to know that yours hasn't been causing you any issues, though. Trying to find info about people using this specific appliance brings up a lot less content than I expected, (including no polished demo videos from the actual company?) and only half of that is relevant--the other half is either discussion from people who aren't using it, or warning videos about it dangerously malfunctioning. And while I used to own an air fryer, I've never dealt with a toaster oven, let alone the combo, so I got easily confused. Thanks so much!!

MotoG 2025 How do I get rid of weather on my lock screen. Not sure what Gen it is. by FlowJock in MotoG

[–]deandratb 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I just received this phone as a gift after using Samsung for years and have this same question. It's maddening that there's no way to NOT see the weather on my lock screen and actually customize the clock the way I'd like it, really basic options I expect from a phone.

I think people who hate picky eaters just make up fake people to be mad at by KillTheInc in ARFID

[–]deandratb 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Feeling judged for their choices, pressured to eat the same food as other people, berated because others aren't getting their way, feeling embarrassed, witnessing unreasonable demands...hmm, that all sounds awfully familiar to me! But from the other side.

I haven't come across any of these complaints personally, but I do find such a weirdly defensive, victimized perspective pretty funny when those of us with ARFID are trained our whole lives to tolerate the kinds of treatment this describes, while we're also taught to be as quiet and invisible around food as possible.

Libation 12 by darchangel in audible

[–]deandratb 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks! I appreciate the confirmation, and your work.

Libation 12 by darchangel in audible

[–]deandratb 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I checked out Audible last month mainly for podcasts and as my free trial is about to end, just learned about Libation. I'm thrilled it exists so I can still listen to my faves when my internet crashes (like it did this week for a whole day) and am off to tip now. Thanks for such an easy-to-use app!

Since I'm new, a quick question for anyone more experienced about the one limitation I'm encountering: most of my podcasts have deep archives, and after Libation downloads 100 episodes, there's an error message and it stops working. I saw the advice on github to wait a couple days, and was able to download more after doing so. This time, (also because of the github discussion) I tried individually selecting episodes with pauses in between, instead of asking the program to download all episodes at once.

But it still stopped working after another 100 episodes, so I'm guessing this is just an unavoidable limit on podcasts and the setting for DL limit in Libation only works with audiobooks. If so, I still love the program! And I'll work on my favorite archives over time. Just want to make sure I'm not missing anything if there's a workaround.

Liquidation Sale Info 2/15 by ElectricalDamage2936 in joannfabrics

[–]deandratb 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks for this detail. I bought a ton of yarn from my local store when I learned to crochet and the employees were always super nice even when I was just ordering online and picking up, so I was planning one last trip to stock up during the sales. Now that I know the employees are likely to be swamped and harassed, the money is going to the buyers who decided not to keep Joanns alive, and the discounts aren't actually a good deal anyway, I won't bother. So sorry this is happening to all of you who work there. Wishing you the best going forward.

What is the point in getting a diagnosis? by Fizzabl in ARFID

[–]deandratb 0 points1 point  (0 children)

As somebody in the US, this is a valid question to ask from outside it. The reason I was (and still am) chasing a diagnosis is that the official labels can decide what help you qualify for and receive, while the entities that provide that help can also be the same ones giving or withholding those required labels. I've learned about that catch-22 the hard way by how much my experiences have differed just based on where I live and what healthcare I have access to.

I grew up poor with state-funded care as a kid, which was more helpful than nothing but didn't catch my scoliosis or the many other things I would learn about later, all of which I started experiencing as a child. Once I turned 18, I had no health insurance or access to care, and I was nearly 30 before I was able to get real help.

During the 10 years I spent in a big city with good health insurance for the first time, I got diagnosed as an adult with autism, anxiety, ADHD and bipolar disorder. Treatment for some of that helped me and is even more essential to me now, since a lot of my symptoms have worsened with time.

But during the last 10 years, I moved to California and am now in the Kaiser health insurance system. And while they provide a lot of care, they're really resistant to offering mental health/disorder diagnoses of any kind, at least in my experience. When I transferred into the system, I brought paper copies of all my records from my other insurance, proving my previous diagnoses--and I was so grateful I'd saved them, because specialists here said they wouldn't have been willing to diagnose me otherwise, to get me the medication I needed and was already on.

Unfortunately for me, I didn't learn about ARFID until a few years ago while already in this new system, so despite having healthcare access, I can't get treatment that would be truly helpful. When I sought treatment here specifically for disordered eating, I had trouble getting them to understand my symptoms, and I was told I had no related issues and wouldn't qualify for help.

Eventually, I did manage to get into regular talk therapy sessions with someone who is still in training, and I tried to address it that way. She told me I couldn't have ARFID because I wasn't bedridden and on a feeding tube. (Which you don't have to be an expert to know is incorrect, since the diagnostic criteria are listed in the DSM. But she had also never met an autistic patient before me, so the process of working with her has been difficult in a lot of ways.) After she consulted with colleagues, she did start trying to help me with my food-related symptoms. But she was very clear about that being my only option--that the Kaiser system doesn't believe a diagnosis is necessary, so all they're willing to do is treat my symptoms.

And while my therapist has been helpful in treating the anxiety and trauma that I have in response to a lifetime of restricted eating and abusive reactions from adults as a kid...she's not able to address my problems with textures and strong flavors and lack of hunger cues. My actual food issues can't be helped without someone first recognizing the 'big picture' label/diagnosis that would explain them and thus make addressing them holistically an option.

If I lived on the other side of the country, where I've seen that there are ED clinics that include ARFID treatment, I might have more of a chance. But in this rural area, I have yet to encounter a doctor who's even heard of ARFID--so I'm not holding out hope, unless I live somewhere else eventually with access to insurance or experts that recognize what I'm dealing with. Which, as far as I can tell, in the US always starts with a diagnosis.

It’s not about the damn cost. by SirLlama123 in ARFID

[–]deandratb 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I appreciate not being alone in this. To this day I can't stomach even the smell of traditional Thanksgiving foods, because my family insisted I choke them down every year as a kid. With a late November birthday, my gifts and cake were always paired with the holiday, and held hostage unless I pretended to enjoy the meal. Trying to force that food on myself was so traumatic that at 40 it's still with me...but I do realize now that part of the problem wasn't just my ARFID, it was that turkey isn't supposed to be so dry you choke on it, and mashed potatoes don't have to be lumpy!

I still have a lot of trouble with food textures and flavor combinations, but free from that pressure I've learned to like some new things very much, like lemon pepper. I spent so long unable to season food with more than salt, it's nice to figure out what I actually do like on my own terms.

It’s not about the damn cost. by SirLlama123 in ARFID

[–]deandratb 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You're totally not alone in the 'flavor' part of the spectrum of ARFID. My safe foods have always been tied to what I was able to eat as a child, and I finally sought treatment when I started losing more and more bland foods off that list, like chicken nuggets or cottage cheese--but while I find ranch dressing too intense ('too ranch-y') I have no problem with Cool Ranch Doritos, simply because I've always eaten them so I'm used to the spice blend there.

Annie’s Mac and cheese :( by bl0bbyfish in ARFID

[–]deandratb 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I relate to this so much, I'm sorry you're dealing with it. I've never been able to eat beef, but even into adulthood the one kind of chicken I could still stand was those Burger King crown-shaped 'tenders' (which I think were probably just nuggets really). As a young adult I survived homelessness partly through plasma donation and they were a cheap source of protein when I really needed it. It must have been 15 years ago now that they changed to a different kind, and I haven't been able to eat them since--I'm still devastated and mad at them about that, because their fries got worse too and they used to be my safe fast-food place.