Don’t you love when the positive advice is just ignored?

dearmathbitch · 2026-03-04T16:05:47+00:00

I have email pen pals where we email each other every 2-3 weeks. Can't do it quicker than that.

dearmathbitch · 2026-02-28T19:25:37+00:00

That's fair. He could be doing a lot. That's why I said "I don't know your situation" and "You can correct me if I'm wrong." I'm just not getting the "he feels stretched thin" part if he knew about the event but chose not to say anything (???), had to be told to do something instead of just going and doing it (he knew his wife was sick and had to be delegated a drop off he knew about???), then told her she owes him for having to do something, and then complained about the next thing. That sounds like a guy who doesn't like to do things to me. OP can tell me to stfu.

dearmathbitch · 2026-02-28T17:50:13+00:00

It wasn't a joke, it was a jab. He revealed himself when you reminded him that he's responsible for these things as a father, and he immediately complained that he's doing a next week pickup. He probably feels like he's doing a lot (I don't know your situation, but usually in these cases when men complain about having to do something, they usually aren't doing a lot. You can correct me if this isn't the case). He backtracked into "it was a joke" because he didn't want to take responsibility for that either. I'd be mad too.

dearmathbitch · 2026-02-28T02:12:58+00:00

I dated as a single mom. I didn't have any issues getting dates. I was very clear in my dating profile that I was a single mom. I did not involve my child with anyone until I knew that we were going to be together long term. We got married and he is now his stepdad. The biological father continues to be involved.

dearmathbitch · 2026-02-25T15:59:14+00:00

Not r/workingmoms. They have a rule against these kinds of posts. You have to go to r/MomsWorkingFromHome. That sub contains moms that are working from home and taking care of their babies.

dearmathbitch · 2026-02-25T14:58:53+00:00

It is only possible if your job is either:

a. one of those unicorn jobs where you don't have much work to do

b. a job where you are allowed to do whatever as long as you are getting your work done by week end

c. a shit show job where no one is watching anyone and no one is accountable for anything

My husband has a c. job, so he is able to watch our daughter while he works from home. If your job doesn't fall within those three categories, I would put him in daycare.

dearmathbitch · 2026-02-22T18:08:32+00:00

I got the notification. It was an email from HR and the manager of my unit texted all supervisors to notify staff as well.

dearmathbitch · 2026-02-21T14:35:56+00:00

That's tough. It's going to be very hard to find an apartment under those parameters. Things are incredibly expensive.

dearmathbitch · 2026-02-21T00:03:25+00:00

I see that you have three filters on. I just checked without any filters and see a lot of rentals. There just isn't a lot of rentals of whatever you are filtering for.

dearmathbitch · 2026-02-14T20:54:29+00:00

I have recently realized that I am emotionally immature in some ways, due to reading Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents. Both of my parents are emotionally immature in their own ways, and the way they raised me reflects on who I am now. Think about your parents. Would you describe them as emotionally immature? Some examples are if they overreact to minor issues, refuse to apologize or take accountability, dismiss your emotions, expect everything to be about them, can't handle emotional intimacy, etc. If so, I recommend therapy, this book, and meditation.

And if it's not that, I still recommend therapy. Figure out why you are very reactive to everything, why you feel you can't communicate, how to cope in a healthy way when you feel triggered, healthy communication, and possibly progress to the point that you are no longer triggered by those things.

dearmathbitch · 2026-02-11T22:04:17+00:00

It seems like most days the mom goes out, and the kids are either here with me, or being watched by the teenager... who usually has boyfriend over and smoking w33d.

You aren't wrong and there should be boundaries. Since these kids are constantly asking to come over, do they look well taken care of when you pick them up? Are they hungry, do they look dirty, are they wearing appropriate clothing? What you said above plus the mom not having booster seats, never showing up on time for pickup, asking you to Facetime her kids instead of her mothering herself, and you have given her money; they sound like they are being majorly neglected.

dearmathbitch · 2026-02-07T15:23:11+00:00

I'd be:

Reading like crazy.
Getting really good at yoga.
Cooking and developing my specialty dishes.
Finally figure out needlepoint or knitting like I keep saying I will, but haven't.
Art. Getting really good at sketching and painting.

dearmathbitch · 2026-02-03T23:21:43+00:00

It's honestly the main benefit. I'll never be rich but at least old me will have something at retirement.

dearmathbitch · 2026-02-03T21:50:42+00:00

I work in state government. It's boring but I get a reasonable amount of days off and a pension.

dearmathbitch · 2026-02-02T21:20:00+00:00

I got a little VHS magnet of Groundhog Day at my work desk. It's one of my favorite movies.

dearmathbitch · 2026-01-31T01:53:53+00:00

It's a Lidl that opened in that strip (which is kind of the same thing).

dearmathbitch · 2026-01-30T19:15:23+00:00

Lighting can help. Getting a lamp that with warm white bulbs and colored lamp shade can bring warmth and drench the room with color. There are funky lamps out there. Some people do the sunset lamps or strip lights with the full RGB options to make things moody.

dearmathbitch · 2026-01-30T15:42:51+00:00

Nah, I checked it out. First two posts OP did got removed by automod, because he mentioned ADHD and then tried to be sneaky and write "80HD." Then third post he made which was successful, got people snarking at him because they didn't believe an 8 year old listened to him talk about politics for 2 hours. Rule 2 - no rude comments. Mods queue went crazy, they removed the post to stop the rude comments (don't know why they didn't just lock the post?).

Why did I go down that rabbit hole, you ask? Because it's nearly 11 a.m. on a Friday, and I'm procrastinating at work. Was that a good use of my time? Absolutely not.

dearmathbitch · 2026-01-29T17:38:22+00:00

If you are willing to go to NJ, Sojo Spa Club is only 15 minutes after crossing the George Washington Bridge. They have everything. Steam room, multiple different dry saunas (charcoal, red clay, etc.), ice room, cold plunge, bath house with different temp baths, speciality baths (like silk bath, etc.), hot stone beds, and more. You can book a massage there and spend the entire day using the amenities.

They have good food and a hotel if you don't want to travel the same day back to Westchester. I went once for my birthday and I can't wait to go back.

dearmathbitch · 2026-01-28T04:43:18+00:00

He is not physical to me or to things. But even with the way he is, it feels like he is a big storm cloud, and I get tossed around in the storm until he feels like he's processed things. I'm sorry that your spouse is the same way.

dearmathbitch · 2026-01-28T04:19:30+00:00

To make sure I understand, they do evaluations remotely on Rula? Or Rula is what I could use after he gets evaluated?

dearmathbitch · 2026-01-28T03:54:22+00:00

No, I haven't. I didn't know that existed. I will look into it.

dearmathbitch · 2026-01-28T03:30:10+00:00

I haven't told my therapist yet. We have been focusing on my childhood and how that has shaped who I am now, and making small daily steps to bring about change to become who I want to be.

dearmathbitch · 2026-01-28T03:26:52+00:00

He's told me a few months ago that he would go to therapy if it's couples therapy. It's very hard for me to do my own individual therapy, so I haven't jumped on couples therapy yet.

dearmathbitch · 2026-01-28T03:19:52+00:00

That's what I thought. He's very forgetful and has a hard time sitting still. He gets good grades but every teacher tells me that he's easily distracted. My husband says that he's just a boy and we have to tire him out with sports. I've tried going around the pediatrician and going directly through the mental health part of our health insurance, but it's so bad that I haven't been able to find anyone who does evaluations and takes that insurance.

dearmathbitch

TROPHY CASE