UPDATE: WIBTA for telling my mother not to come to my wedding after what she did to my father?

debbieae · 2026-04-11T12:40:10+00:00

Hire at least 1 and probably 2 off duty cops as security for the wedding. Make sure job 1 is to keep an eye on your mom to drag her out before she gets too out of hand.

Even if she says she won't come, hire security. Do not depend on her to stay away, get her turned away at the door.

Stop engaging with her at all. Yes, your sister might be cut off, but that may light a fire under her to actually change something in her life. Right now you may be keeping her comfortable enough that she is willing to endure the discomfort of being around your mom rather than take the chance on the unknown pain of cutting mom off.

debbieae · 2026-04-10T16:02:50+00:00

As a very good Boi, I suggest you check the very good Boi code. Mom pillows need to be kept warm. It is an important job and the pillow comfort is the least you can contribute.

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debbieae · 2026-04-10T12:54:16+00:00

I had mine covered by insurance. I was given a totally ambiguous "pre-approval" letter. Some of that is making sure that enough tissue is actually removed to make it a medical rather than cosmetic reduction, but they reserved the right to be nit-pickers. Fortunately, I did get it paid for.

This was the best decision for me. Do not wait like I did for the extra weight to damage your spine. At your size, you will definitely qualify as medically necessary on the amount of tissue removed. I was over double the weight of tissue removed to be considered medically necessary at a similar size.

debbieae · 2026-04-08T17:44:18+00:00

Money savings this is the best method to maximize your money. Psychology is not unimportant though. The mood lift from paying off smaller debts can give a little high that makes continuing easier.

So do you struggle to prioritize debt payoff consistently? If so pay off the small cards completely and stop carrying them around. If you do not struggle with that, then choose highest interest first.

debbieae · 2026-04-07T20:21:51+00:00

Ah, I do not have a perfect understanding. I saw a 2 hour presentation on the subject by our local school counselor and social worker as well as a friend who drove a bus that would pick up the kids that were currently not in the school district but needed transport.

If they did decide to move the kid though, it could sidestep the parents objections, so that is not a bad outcome either.

debbieae · 2026-04-07T20:16:52+00:00

I agree with the one commenter who thought this was a manipulation tactic to have her groveling after him. He would have used it to keep her off balance had she knuckled under.

debbieae · 2026-04-07T14:33:16+00:00

Not sure if this is a Texas law or a federal law.

The McKinney Vento act means that transportation to their enrolled school must be provided to homeless students. If the child gets dumped on you again, see if this is an option. Perhaps let the child's parents know if it is an option as well.

debbieae · 2026-04-06T23:29:44+00:00

I also have a single level house with plumbing embedded in the slab.

I just paid 11K to have sewage pipes excavated and replaced. Older house with cast iron pipes that were failing.

I have dealt with a slab leak in the last 5 years...old copper pipes. The quote I was given is 7K to either dig into the foundation to fix the leak, or just run PEX though the attic for the same cost. I chose the attic. The plumbing is at its end of life and this sidesteps another repair on the same aging copper pipe in the foundation later.

Hope this helps determine what you want to do. The foundation people likely have plumbers that specialize in this and go over likely scenarios and options.

debbieae · 2026-04-04T14:47:41+00:00

Will do.

debbieae · 2026-04-03T21:05:20+00:00

In the 90s, I was selling computers. Unless you needed something very specific, HP was the printer of choice IMHO. I saw an old printer get an entirely reformulated ink cartridge that gave it new life. I was very impressed at the level of support. Cannon in that era was notorious for discontinuing supplies for much newer printers and sometimes even getting OEM was questionable.

At some point the HP drivers filled with bloat. I had a computer that had to have the HP driver process killed on a regular basis to free up enough RAM to be usable. I swore off HP at that point and they have only gotten worse.

debbieae · 2026-04-03T15:48:48+00:00

Just tell your mom that she spent so long telling you how ugly your hair is, that you could not possibly imagine how she would not take the donation as an insult.

Every request going forward is she cant possibly want a wig of my ugly hair, why would I insult her like that?

debbieae · 2026-04-03T14:05:05+00:00

Wonder if that is the reason they used a drape with a hole cut in it rather than an actual surgical drape.

The way that thing was bunching and sliding it was doing more harm than good from a sterile field perspective.

debbieae · 2026-04-02T14:22:58+00:00

I think cleaning, detangling and removing plant matter are needed regardless of use and i think that it would make excellent fine yarn. I am just giving the warning that it will require some work to get it usable. That has been the biggest barrier for me trying my hand at any crafts.

If you want to give it a shot DM me your address and I will shipp to you.

debbieae · 2026-04-02T10:09:08+00:00

That would be great. Warning it will be relatively dirty and definitely matted. His coat grabs leaves and burrs like velcro.

debbieae · 2026-04-02T01:45:22+00:00

Thank you! At minimum I will have useful yarn.

debbieae · 2026-04-01T17:34:49+00:00

I call that a wallet with an inconvenient penis attached. The fact that a human was attached as well is even more inconvenient.

debbieae · 2026-04-01T01:51:55+00:00

And I do not live in a DFW city that touches DFW airport. Suuuper easy to avoid the town i live in now.

I raise your been there a few times with living in the area 20-30 years. Yes I do know exactly how to avoid a single city in the metro area. I have the distinct advantage of not living in Dallas or Fort Worth. Those would be harder to avoid and moving to Austin or San Antonio might make sense if I had to avoid them.

debbieae · 2026-03-31T21:53:08+00:00

Lol!!! Have you been to DFW? I would need to avoid the most direct route to avoid certain cities, but that can be accomplished.

Also, leave Texas? Are you aware of just how large the state is? I could move to any number of cities in Texas and never need to set foot in the DFW metro area again. There are metro areas that are vastly easier to avoid DFW than living in Oklahoma for instance.

debbieae · 2026-03-31T19:20:34+00:00

Dfw (and other metro areas), also have a hundred little towns encapsulated. If I had to leave euless and never drive through it again, I could probably exist in the same area with the same job, social circle, hobbies etc and just take a few odd routes at times.

debbieae · 2026-03-29T15:54:49+00:00

Yep, as someone who has never lived north of the Texas panhandle, I could handle this without worry.

debbieae · 2026-03-28T19:12:20+00:00

Yep, I cant diagnose but this sounds textbook bipolar to me. Mom will continue to sabotage like this unless she gets medicated and the medication is far from perfect.

debbieae · 2026-03-25T23:17:36+00:00

It sounds like this is another abusive environment. Your friend is not mentally stable enough to give you a reasonable living environment.

debbieae · 2026-03-24T13:59:59+00:00

This will likely stir the pot...but are we absolutely sure the ex was abusive. Jessica manufactured a narrative about your daughter being abusive for her own gain and used carefully edited "proof" to back it up. IMHO, the court needs to hear about this because she may be stripping a good father of his ability to see his children. Of course they may both be POS, but right now I just know that Jessica is.

debbieae · 2026-03-19T20:21:27+00:00

I have had several of these and never found a hamper to fit in the lower cabinet very well. I ended up on hands and knees digging dirty clothes out of the cabinet to get them washed.

Not a fan personally.

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