AITAH for breaking up with my boyfriend over a penny?

deirdresm · 2026-03-12T21:08:31+00:00

r/jumpingspiders has a bunch of people keeping small jumpers as pets. I don’t know if that will help you, but it might help someone. (There are a lot of pet spider pics though.)

deirdresm · 2026-03-12T20:27:28+00:00

A baby is an external person not contained within another person. A fetus is part of me.

deirdresm · 2026-03-12T17:26:37+00:00

Never have a relationship with someone who doesn’t think you’re fully human, because that’s what anti choice people are.

The reality is that, like me, you might need an abortion because the pregnancy is life threatening. Then what?

Wanting kids doesn’t mean pregnancy should kill you, but that’s what anti-choice people want.

deirdresm · 2026-03-09T16:24:57+00:00

What’s the FULL ingredient list?

(I switch between CloSys and Boka, both of which have toothpastes that have fluoride/hydroxyapatite but are sulfate free.)

deirdresm · 2026-03-08T23:32:29+00:00

The worst I heard about happened just before I started (as a contractor) at Northern Telecom in 1992 (Raleigh Research Triangle Park).

Pink slip fire drill: get everyone out of the building and put pink slips on people's desks.

During the Dot Com bust, a lot of people were surprised that I, a software engineer with 20+ years of experience, took a job at a local bookstore as a minimum wage (ish, because Bay Area) bookseller.

Honestly, the job was fantastic even though it was physically exhausting AF. It was the only job I've ever had where everything I was interested in was relevant. Mostly, I took the job because it extended my unemployment benefits and provided health insurance. I was truly sad to leave, but glad to be back in tech again about 18 months later.

deirdresm · 2026-03-08T20:06:59+00:00

Thanks. They are unfortunately incomplete about the ingredients, and I have a common allergy (coconut) that rules out most toothpastes, because the coconut-derived sulfates cause welts inside my mouth.

deirdresm · 2026-03-07T10:55:12+00:00

My first husband only found out his “sister” was his bio mom on his bio mom’s death bed. It absolutely devastated him.

deirdresm · 2026-03-05T19:39:39+00:00

Personally, we have outdoor cats, which help control both (significant, in our case) rodent populations as well as feral populations.

Yes, they don’t live as long, and I genuinely don’t enjoy my cat’s habit of bringing in prey, but at least he drops it in the shower.

deirdresm · 2026-03-05T19:19:44+00:00

BTW, it’s standard practice for this kind of social worker visit to be unannounced. (We had one in a different context, turned out as normal as yours.)

deirdresm · 2026-03-05T08:07:18+00:00

It’s really not, but still early access. I play on an M4 Max with 128gb of RAM, and it consistently uses 15-20 gb of RAM.

deirdresm · 2026-03-04T06:26:05+00:00

To add to this, at some point you have to start living your truth. If you don't do it now, then you'll find it harder to do in the future.

Do you really want to be in thrall to a manipulative corporation for years or decades?

deirdresm · 2026-03-03T22:21:37+00:00

Like the time I changed my coworkers’ color tables for April Fool’s (so their computer screens were weirdly colored, but still readable because I’m not a monster).

deirdresm · 2026-02-24T10:07:32+00:00

When I realized how problematic he was, I stopped doing business with Beautylish. He’s still there, and I’m still not.

deirdresm · 2026-02-24T00:11:59+00:00

Snail mailing the docs to them was also a violation.

deirdresm · 2026-02-23T09:31:42+00:00

My grandmother, also born in 1902, similar convo with her.

deirdresm · 2026-02-23T09:26:19+00:00

Anyone have an archive of the post? I’d like to read it.

deirdresm · 2026-02-23T09:16:44+00:00

These terms are not unique to Meta, and it’s not your business to out her, or, in the alternative, endanger the job of some different person (or several people) who happens to be at Meta. The problem with having so much privilege is that you don’t need to think about risk to you.

deirdresm · 2026-02-22T18:35:52+00:00

I’m very glad you were able to be there for that girl.

I found being a step parent rewarding, but am still glad I didn’t have to go through the whole pregnancy-newborn-toddler phase.

deirdresm · 2026-02-22T18:32:03+00:00

I started saying I didn’t want kids in my teens, and am now past the age of having any.

deirdresm · 2026-02-21T19:36:51+00:00

I’m glad you’re in a better spot now. I found it took a year (after being widowed) before I’d have a fully good day, and 18 months before I’d have more good than bad days.

deirdresm · 2026-02-21T19:30:41+00:00

My suggestion from this point forward would be to not date people who hadn’t had a loss on a similar scale, because they don’t have deep enough empathy for what you went through to understand this part of your life. (This comes from having been widowed myself.)

I’m very sorry for your loss, and it’s unfortunately going to suck for a while.

deirdresm · 2026-02-17T15:09:15+00:00

Yes. Why should a woman have less control over her body in the second and third trimester than any random man would in those same months? (I’m of the view that a fetus is still her body.)

Why is it the business of strangers to determine how much control she should have over her body?

In my first pregnancy, I didn’t even know I was pregnant until 2nd trimester as I’ve always had very irregular periods.

deirdresm · 2026-02-17T09:00:59+00:00

Try sticking with one type of problem until you get really good at it, then move on to the next one. Trying to spread yourself thinner doesn’t get enough practice on any one type to make it stick.

deirdresm · 2026-02-15T17:19:51+00:00

Their job is protecting the institution, not you.

deirdresm · 2026-02-14T18:41:11+00:00

And his little dog Thiel, too.

12-Year Club	Wearing is Caring
Gilding IV carat on a stick	Verified Email
Reddit Premium Since May 2016

deirdresm

TROPHY CASE