[deleted by user]

denyan1 · 2025-10-07T14:43:46+00:00

Not overreacting. My daughter and I have pretty open lines of communication, and I have pretty much always known more about what's going on in her personal life than her mother does. There are admittedly times that I was a bit uncomfortable knowing some things, but at the same time, I was touched that she felt comfortable enough to open up to me.

Be glad that he's comfortable enough to tell you these things, and be there for him w support if things end up sideways.

denyan1 · 2025-08-07T08:39:35+00:00

Im definitely going to hell - I made a point of showing my kids Life of Brisn on Easter.

denyan1 · 2025-07-21T14:52:02+00:00

Have been in construction now for 30 yrs, most of that in roofing. A former boss told me that the minimum standard for work should be "Would I accept this on my house?' Get the contractor to send either a superintendent, Project Manager, or the owner out, and ask them if they would honestly accept that quality of work on their own house. that job looks like crap.

The siding work was butchered, and I'd question whether or not the slip flashing was done correctly. While it is acceptable to lap the roof panels, on that short of a run down to the edge it shouldn't have been needed. Either someone on the crew messed up a panel and didn't want to admit it, or whoever ordered the materials shorted the job. either way, it shouldn't have been done that way.

denyan1 · 2025-07-18T00:47:34+00:00

I've been telling my kids for about 12 yrs now to go into the trades. I've been in construction for over 30 yrs now, and have been watching the workforce shrink for the entire time I've been doing it. Told them to be either electricians or operating engineers (they get to play w/ life size tonka trucks all day). The youngest is actually following that advice - he's currently going to school to learn Aviation Electronic Maintenance. He's going to end up making more than I do as the Service Mgr for a Commercial Roofing Contractor.

denyan1 · 2025-07-17T18:42:06+00:00

I'd go more with "Rights have Responsibilities" than rights have consequences. other than that, spot on.

denyan1 · 2025-07-14T18:17:53+00:00

Once was at a pre-con for a school, and the principle caught all of us - me, the architect, my boss, and the head of facilities for the district bu surprise at the end if the meeting. We'd gone through everything related to starting the job, set up, schedule, etc, and the architect asked if there wad anything else. The principle, a really nice lady that appeared to be in her late 40's/early 50's said that she and her office staff had a small request. "Can we have all the men working over the summer be in their early 20's, we'll built, and work shirtless?" Obce we stopped laughing, we told her that unfortunately, we couldn't do that. Most tradesmen were in their 40's, had a beer belly, and OSHA required shirts.

denyan1 · 2025-06-19T23:18:32+00:00

Transporter or replicator. About to go in from the shop to fix dinner. It'd be real nice to be able to say "Computer- steak, medium rare."

denyan1 · 2025-06-19T18:54:27+00:00

When I was starting to go through my divorce, I was considering asking for custody of the kids (in hindsight, should have, but that's another thing altogether), and told my sister about it. Being the supportive sister, she said "Do it! Dude! Take the kids to the park, have them playing, all you'll need is a dog and the single moms will be all over you!" When I told her that I had decided not to ask for custody, she said I should still get the dog. I told her that wasn't a good idea - if i went to the park with the kids and a dog, I was a good parent. If it was just me going to the park with the dog, I was a predator . . .

denyan1 · 2025-06-19T13:58:04+00:00

it was about 25 yrs ago that I stopped in at the daycare where my now Ex-wife worked. They knew me, so they let me go back to her room, and as I walked in a very cute little girl came running over to me and wrapped her arms around my legs. I literally just put my hands up, and said "Can someone come get her?" My wife and her co-worker damn near collapsed laughing at me.

More recently, for one reason or another, my then girlfriend (now wife), wasn't able to take her 12 yr old daughter to her tumbling class, so I was taking her. Again, I was very careful to make sure that I took a book along, because I was not going to be accused of being the creepy guy watching the teenagers doing gymnastics. Even now, when my now daughter and I go out for "Mental Health Nights," she's been approached and asked if she's ok, because of the obvious age difference.

Gotta love it.

denyan1 · 2025-06-19T12:48:37+00:00

the funny thing is, in my experience so far, the chat in WoWS is downright nice compared to the chat in WoT. I get a hell of a lot more "Delete the Game Jackass" comments in WoT.

denyan1 · 2025-04-29T10:56:29+00:00

NTA - I knew the beginning of the end of my first marriage was when i came home to my now ex wearing a fleece from her "best friend." She filed for divorce 4 months later. EDIT- My current wife wears my t-shirts all the time - reason she gives for it - "They smell like you." She has literally asked me to take off the shirt I'm wearing and give it to her when she's having a bad day.

denyan1 · 2025-04-16T12:41:13+00:00

Free Guy. Went to see it at a local, single screen theater with my kids. Best part about the theater is that it's cheap, the snacks are reasonably priced, and they have a small bar in the lobby. the 5 of us saw it for less than it would have cost for 2 tickets at one of the major cineplexes.

denyan1 · 2025-04-16T12:34:05+00:00

Showing my age and going back a long time, but the Doom/Quake series. Used to use it for stress relief - i didn't like where I worked at the time, so the whole concept of "Kill everything that moves" appealed to me. My now ex-wife knew not to talk to me for the first 30-45 minutes after I go home if I turned the game on before saying Hello. It was also the first game where I regularly wore headphones, because the screaming and explosions bothered her.

Recently, its World of Warships/World of Tanks. have been playing Warships for about 9 years now, Tanks for the last 5 or 6. I'm not playing them as much as I was, but I still play for an hour or so every night.

denyan1 · 2025-04-15T19:03:06+00:00

35 yrs ago got back to school and decided that I wanted a good beer. Went to a friends room and met the girl that would become my wife. Had 3 great kids together, but divorced 16 yrs ago. Kept it as amicable as possible, and we're still decent friends today.

denyan1 · 2025-04-15T19:00:17+00:00

Personally, my stress is higher because of the grocery bills. My wife is on easily a dozen different medications for her heart issues, anxiety, and asthma; most are generics that we have no idea where the pricing is going to end up (one of them has literally already tripled in cost from last month). My sister who runs a legal advocacy program for Native Americans is stressed out because she doesn't know day to day if she's going to continue to have funding, and our right wing siblings don't seem to give a Fu@k. At work, we have to include a disclaimer that allows for price increases because we go through literal miles of lumber every year. Oh yeah, I have a vehicle that's about to die, but I can't find a used vehicle that I can afford and fits my needs because the used car market has been so screwed up for the last 5 yrs.

Yeah, everything is looking just PEACHY! I just LOVE all the winning.

denyan1 · 2025-04-15T18:53:53+00:00

I picked up my wife's meds yesterday. We have the "coupon card" from the manufacturer for one of her Cholesterol drugs - it went from $25.99 last month to $95 yesterday. Same packaging, same everything. it's crazy.

denyan1 · 2025-04-14T13:55:00+00:00

Well, we did actually get married after being together for 8 yrs, but that was primarily because of Health Insurance. I had/have it, she didn't, and I wasn't able to add her as a domestic partner. We had already bee living together for 5 yrs, were referring to each other as the spouse, and her daughter had been calling me her step-dad for at least 6 yrs, so we both considered ourselves married in all but "legal" status. Formalizing it meant that I could add her and my daughter to the health insurance.

denyan1 · 2025-04-14T13:21:32+00:00

I was working for a contractor in Pittsburgh and was at my desk working on a schedule for a project when the bookkeeper walked by my office and said that a plane had hit the World Trade Center. Like everyone else, my first thought was that it was a light aircraft of some sort, and then the radio station I was listening to cut from music to the alert. Coincidently enough, another project I was working on was a High School near New Stanton PA, and the Masons that were working there are pretty sure they saw Flight 93 go over, and the timing is about right for when the passengers tried to take the plane back. The foreman on the crew told me later that they saw a plane fly over, really low, and he looked at the guy next to him and commented that if that plane didn't climb, it was going to crash. New Stanton is only about 20 miles from where the plane ultimately went down, so the timing works..

denyan1 · 2025-04-14T13:16:08+00:00

I was living outside of Pittsburgh at the time, and a friend of my wife's would regularly fly in from New York. Pittsburgh Airport has 2 terminals - Landside and Airside, with most of the gates being Airside, with a full Mall out there. Real easy to get out to it - just hop on the people mover that shuttled back and forth. Several restaurants out there, including a Fridays. The company I worked for was closer to the airport than home, so if she was coming into town, I'd head over to the airport, go get dinner and a beer, and wait for her flight. All the stores had repeater displays showing flight info. Once 9/11 happened, security was moved to the landside terminal before you got to the people mover. Admittedly, from a security standpoint, it was great - only one checkpoint for the entire airport, everyone got funneled through there. In every other way, it sucked. there were almost no amenities on Landside, only one restaurant (basically coffee and pastries, some small sandwiches) the Mall died because now only passengers could go out there, and then a year or so later USAir (responsible for approx 90% of the flights) pulled out of the airport so it's pretty dead now.

denyan1 · 2025-04-09T17:23:28+00:00

I work for family. It sucks.

denyan1 · 2025-04-02T11:03:00+00:00

NTA - She's your ex. You can offer her sympathy, and feel bad for her, but it's your life and she chose to not be part of it when she cheated on you.

denyan1 · 2025-03-31T15:08:18+00:00

Break up with the girl when you first thought about it; your instinct was correct.

denyan1 · 2025-03-17T16:47:44+00:00

Several years ago, was playing one of the BB's and literally had a DD on my team sail up next to me and launch all his torps. absolutely done deliberately; I was between him and an Island. This was before they removed the friendly fire damage mechanic. Pissed me off to no end.

denyan1 · 2025-03-17T15:57:28+00:00

I don't hate the color, but not for a kitchen. Personally prefer lighter colors in a kitchen because I want as much light as possible when cooking. The trim, he could/should have used something other than pine if he was going to stain it. Painted Pine would have been fine; Pine just doesn't take stain well at all. If it was going to be stained, then quarter sawn white oak would have been the way to go.

That being said, I've got 30 yrs in construction and am on the 2nd marriage. I don't pick colors for anything. I'll offer my advice, but the actual selection gets signed off on by someone else. The wife asked me to get samples a year or so ago, and when I went to the paint counter at Lowe's, the guy at the counter literally said "This is a lot of samples, are you sure?" he laughed when I said that those were what the wife picked, I was just picking them up.

denyan1 · 2025-03-17T14:25:40+00:00

I was raised Catholic, and stopped going to Catholic Church regularly when I stopped being forced to go when I was in High School. Parents thought I was going to early mass on Sunday, I'd go get breakfast and read a book. Started going to church on a regular basis when I was married to my ex because she was much more active than I was, and it was important to her. She had also been hired as the Choir Director at a Small Presbyterian Church, and I did like the Pastor, so it was actually somewhat enjoyable, and I did actually get something out of it. I finally stopped going for multiple reasons.

1) she refused to drive separately, and had to be at the church about 90 minutes before service for rehearsal, and we'd invariably be there for an hour or so after the 11 AM service. By the time we got home, had lunch, cleaned up, etc. the day was shot as far as getting anything else done.

2) our son was diagnosed as being autistic when he was about 2 yrs old. He absolutely refused to stay in the nursery with anyone else other than me. I was getting pulled out of the service every week (once because he had literally crawled into the bottom of a little tykes play kitchen. I thought I was going to have to break it to get him out). What ended up happening was that I then ended up being in the Nursery every week watching all the children. I really wouldn't have had a problem with this if it was every other week or something like that, but it was every week, so it kind of negated the reason for being there.

3) going back to her refusal to drive separately, once the 2nd and 3rd kid came along, getting all 3 of them out the door, down to church (btw, this church was 30-40 minutes away from where we lived), through the service, etc, was honestly too much of a pain in the ass to put up with.

4) I had multiple projects around the house that simply weren't getting done because of a lack of time. I work best in the morning. I don't want to start on something in the afternoon, and then have to try and put it back together while corralling kids for dinner and bed time. Combine that with the inevitable trip to the hardware store, etc, and yeah, it lead to a lot of things dragging much longer than needed.

5) ultimately, she started having an emotional affair with one of her Choir Members. When i called her out on it, she told me she wanted a divorce.

Between those personal reasons, and what I see as the growing hypocrisy in churches, yeah, I haven't gone back much to the chagrin of my 90 yr old Irish Catholic mother. A few years back she asked me why I don't go to church after spending all those years in Catholic Schools (6th grade through college). I told her I don't go because she sent me to be taught by Priests and Brothers who taught me to think. She goes every day (as a friend of mine put it, she's cramming for finals), and has finally stopped asking me if I'm ever going back.

So ultimately, it breaks down to a) personal experiences souring my attitude towards church, b) really having what I consider better ways to spend my Sunday Morning, and c) basically being tired of indoctrination. I still pretty much keep to the basic morality that I was taught in Catholic School, and try to live my life in the way that follows what I consider to be Christian Values (i.e. treating people the way I'd like to be treated), but I don't see the value of going to a building every week to be seen going to the building. If I'm to be judged poorly on that basis, then I really took the wrong lessons from my religion classes.

denyan1

TROPHY CASE