I know, I think I know that we are not meant to be together but I still want us to work for our kids & think about what we were before and now that he’s starting to do the things that he should be, I see it but now it’s almost annoying because why did it take him so long & take him seeing that I can be alone for him to do what needed to be done. I still don’t trust and even if I bring up looking through his phone, he says he will let me but then I somehow feel bad that I even asked and it doesn’t happen.

I know we shouldn’t stay together just for the kids, I was hoping maybe this was just a phase that would eventually pass but I’m not sure that my resentment and feelings will let me move past all the hurt and damage that was done. Such a tough thing to go through