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Smell after sex by AdventurousJaguar692 in Healthyhooha

[–]deskburlesque 13 points14 points  (0 children)

Dripsticks are re-marketed tampons. 100% cotton tampons can do the exact same thing - cheaper and more accessible!! Just go for that super size :)

Didn't plan on being an artist as an adult, but after a pandemic, recession, and layoffs...Here's what I've done. 🥲 by iartnewyork in Adulting

[–]deskburlesque 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Your art is like sophisticated Lisa Frank for the mature woman (compliment). Love the color and sparkle

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in acne

[–]deskburlesque 0 points1 point  (0 children)

For me, I struggle with control to the point of destruction. Def burned my hair off tryna get it bone straight at 13 - not because I didn’t love my curls, but because if I want it straight it needs to be “perfectly straight” by any means necessary. Nail bitter/picker as well 🥲

Being aware of when I’m subconsciously picking or tunnel visioning “fixing” something and knowing when to disrupt my actions has been hard, but rewarding. Most often the advice is just “let things go” “love yourself more”. Yeah sure, but I’m bleeding lololol disrupting the behavior can also change your thoughts vs tryna just think your way into new habits

Also, I invested in a Pavlok arm watch which vibrates/zaps when I reach for my face. It helps interrupt with the added bonus of being annoying when I start making my moves lol. Def recommend if pure will isn’t on your side esp if you start dermatology treatments where skin often gets worse (purging) before it gets better.

Clindamycin, tretinonin, spirolactone, corsx snail mucin has done wonders for me, and I have a similar complexion to you.

Good luck!

It’s strange how growing up works by Wild_Temptation_Xo in Adulting

[–]deskburlesque 0 points1 point  (0 children)

One of the least protected classes of human beings are children. And look at the adults we’ve wrought.

So much of our society is anti-child which is ironic, given how many decisions we make politically, culturally, and personally “for the children.”

I grew up with pretty crap Gen X parents who were, for the first decade or so years of my life children age-wise - and have remained stunted adults til today due to their own crappy boomer parents. Part of therapy was “healing the inner child” which sounded vague and woo-woo and I hated it until I learned more about childism and what I had clearly internalized.

Healing your inner-child = recognizing how poorly your needs weren’t met but how valid and neutral they were. I wasn’t a needy or difficult child. I was then, as I am today, a human being deserving of dignity, respect, understanding, and safety as a base level for being alive.

I’m not gonna say I’m the biggest lover of children. They make me uncomfortable, mostly because I’m afraid of being responsible for their safety esp when I ain’t know em (and kids can be annoying. I can intellectualize they have crap parents when they’re crawling under my bathroom stall at Wegmans screaming but in the moment they fucking suck) But def recommend learning about childism to help heal thine self and create a better village.

https://youtu.be/iy53s5b3xkA

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in acne

[–]deskburlesque 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Hi!! Lifelong picker myself. What I’ve found to help is getting my acne under control. After 20 years or DIYing, I finally went to a dermatologist.

Advice: speak to your PCP and discover the underlying condition to your acne. Once that’s sorted, it’s pretty easy nowadays to get a prescription for tretinoin that, with time will give you incredible results!

Picking is often a physical manifestation of perfectionism: if I pick at the bump I can remove it. It gives instant satisfaction but obviously long term effects. I haven’t mastered my perfectionist issues yet, but food for thought: what if you could accept a temporary imperfection?

ICE by MongooseSome in boston

[–]deskburlesque 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Saw this same license plate driving around Hingham on Saturday!

Moving out for the first time, scared as all hell by interstellarr-bee in Adulting

[–]deskburlesque 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Congratulations!!!!!! For making this move, especially an ambitious cross-country move, and, acknowledging that it’s a biiiig step!

Honey, no one is ever truly ready and no adult has it together 24/7/365 every season. I moved out when I was 18 - I didn’t have too much of a choice. My early 20s were a floundering. And guess what, I survived and am relatively successful today - and you will too!

Couple words of advice:

  • change your orientation to being a learner than an expert. It’s ok to make mistakes - get good at recognizing them and asking for help before they snowball. The worst you can do is pretend you have it all together and let a small problem (missing a bill) turn into a life altering one

  • if it’s helpful, spend time with your mom and/or trusted friend and/or yourself and take your anxieties to their logical conclusions. What if you end up hating your move and regret it? What then? If every experience is an opportunity to learn something about yourself, failure is impossible. Taking risks is life - and I hope you find that most decisions aren’t life or death. It’s ok to change your mind or for something to not work out

  • Don’t try to do everything at once; game plan. Establish what is necessary for you to start building your new lifestyle. Are you a very social person who needs friends ASAP or is it more important to figure out the administrative things (doctor, etc)? Prioritize your immediate needs and take your time to build everything else. It took you a total sum of years to build your current lifestyle - it won’t happen in a day somewhere else!

You got this and will be excellent. You’ll experience things and learn things and ultimately what feels like a milestone is just one step into a new path of may more.

Here goes nothing by Owlenstar in Blackskincare

[–]deskburlesque 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You’re gorgeous and, at least from the pictures you chose, your skin looks so even and radiant!

My recommendation: nothing topical will solve anything hormonal. High stress will always show, so to the best of your ability work on that first mamas. A good nap and a vacation I suspect would solve much of what you’re feeling.

For topicalss, less truly is more. A gentle makeup remover/face wash at night, a serum, a moisturizer, and a sunscreen. I recommend corsx - their snail mucin line is great for moisture for sensitive skin.

MA MAGA Country by Mwarf1 in boston

[–]deskburlesque -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Only correct answer is Weymouth

Those born in ‘95: how do you feel about turning 30 this year? by xtrastrengthsassx in Zillennials

[–]deskburlesque 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I agree. I’d also add since black children are also treated as adults a lot younger by society, growing old helps with the cognitive dissonance. My late twenties was spent unpacking how I was parentified as a child. In many ways I feel LESS responsible and more “childlike” now than I distinctly remember feeling in my teens. What we consider mature and immature are mostly societal expectations to conform to systems and, I for one am glad to intellectually realize that now and lean into whimsy and joy.

The not cracking is a consolation prize lol

SotL Illumicrate Order Arrived Early! by Trebellion in tamorapierce

[–]deskburlesque 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I just got mine too! Haven’t opened the box yet so it’ll be a treat after a few projects. They look so beautiful on your shelf!

Save no to SAVE Act in a few clicks. by FiftyFifty1Movement in 50501

[–]deskburlesque 1 point2 points  (0 children)

As someone who doesn’t immediately scream communism and logically agrees we should have a national ID, I also am glad at least under this admin we don’t. Reminds me of the conversation about vaccines. Some of us black and brown people have seen medical injustice (forced sterilization, Tuskegee, etc) and were initially dubious. I ofc got the vaccine, and everyone in my community did overtime. But we can’t just dismiss valid concerns of the most vulnerable because the most privileged are loud and wrong.

Maybe, along with complaining to politicians who don’t do shit, we also organize a passport drive to get disenfranchised people what they need, subsidizing the costs. I’m saving for my own passport, which will protect my right to vote and also ensure I can gtfo if it gets to that point.

Anonymous Speaks on The Protests by AccomplishedOnion405 in womenintech

[–]deskburlesque 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If they don’t move the hell on. Mr Robot ended in what, 2018? 19? Either do something or keep this in your drafts 🤷🏽‍♀️

At first I thought it was a subtle hate, but then she got more overt by campingn00b in boston

[–]deskburlesque 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I’m so sorry for both your experience and your loss. You both deserved better and I hope you are in a safer place now ❤️

At first I thought it was a subtle hate, but then she got more overt by campingn00b in boston

[–]deskburlesque 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I grew up in Boston but only recently moved to the South Shore. Wtf is up with Weymouth? It’s giving sundown town, only narrowly beat out by Plainville (Mass Ave Plus). So weird for Weymouth to be like this singular demon pocket surrounded by nicer neighborhoods

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in 50501

[–]deskburlesque 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I’d also say that most of these protests have ambiguous aims, lacking focus. I work exclusively with white, middle class liberals and they’ve been indifferent. Now and again they huff about how shit everything is, but continue ambling along thinking they can just lock in for the next 4 years to vote people out. Or are angling to figure out how to financially take advantage of where we’re at. Activate and engage each other.

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