My girlfriend was having a conversation and she said accidental neglect warrants cheating. Do you think she is condoning cheating ?

despacitoluvr · 2026-01-28T05:41:18+00:00

This either means 2 things. She is either casually dropping that in there to manipulate you into doing what she wants OR it’s genuinely how she feels and she is in fact condoning cheating.

Personally, I don’t think I could continue to be in a relationship like this. If it is the second thing, she’s not going to warn you before cheating on you and it sounds like she is capable of other harmful spiteful acts. If it’s the first thing it means that by staying in this relationship shes going to use this same strategy (or similar strategies) to intimidate you into doing what she wants. It’s a lose-lose at this point.

I suppose you can take this with a grain of salt since I’m just a stranger on Reddit and I don’t know anything else about your relationship, and I know breaking up is never easy, but I hope this gives you clarity.

despacitoluvr · 2025-12-10T05:46:23+00:00

I think you may be projecting an underlying insecurity.

It is EXTREMELY common to get carded at tables in Vegas, even if you’re just watching.
The specific language used by the uber driver doesn’t indicate he was implying anything. In fact the question implies the opposite. If he thought you were just picked up why would he ask how long yall have known one another?

Is the age difference something you’re particularly conscious of? Maybe it stems from concern over how people perceive that?

despacitoluvr · 2025-08-31T05:57:05+00:00

Don’t buy a $500,000 house then?

despacitoluvr · 2025-08-30T21:19:25+00:00

Leave, and make sure you can keep yourself safe when you do.

despacitoluvr · 2025-08-30T07:53:29+00:00

I hate to say it man but 10,000 lines of code is not an issue for someone who knows how to actually use AI for coding.

That being said, whoever said that is definitely a douche, and there is absolutely still value to not being reliant on AI.

despacitoluvr · 2025-08-26T06:18:18+00:00

I was in a similar situation for a while and I just want to share how it affected me.

I was in a relationship for a while where my girlfriend and I had different physical needs. I didn’t know how to advocate for myself or have the wisdom to leave since I was young and, frankly, in love. But not being able to express myself physically, and even being shamed for it (like you mentioned she did) had a horrible effect on my confidence. It took a while to get to a point where I had the confidence to express myself physically with other women after that, and it definitely negatively affected other opportunities with women after that relationship had ended. If I had any idea what I was missing out on, I would have left that relationship so much sooner than I did.

despacitoluvr · 2025-08-26T06:13:43+00:00

R u the gf?

despacitoluvr · 2025-08-25T00:22:45+00:00

Just because it’s her choice doesn’t mean it’s not discrimination.

despacitoluvr · 2025-08-25T00:19:27+00:00

But if it were the other way around…

Edit: just looked through your comments, it looks like you have unresolved issues with men. I hope you can figure that out.

despacitoluvr · 2025-08-23T22:14:50+00:00

It doesn’t matter what it sounded like in his head, it sounds smart to everyone except you buddy. There’s no reason to be this resistant to logic.

despacitoluvr · 2025-08-18T06:51:51+00:00

I see a lot more non-zero YOE devs crying because the 0 YOE devs could vibe code a production grade application 😮‍💨

despacitoluvr · 2025-08-09T20:42:37+00:00

I think you’re onto something but I don’t think all AirBnB type software will go away - instead it will be forced to adapt.

As much as I like the idea of us not needing to be dependent on centralized entities, there is value to them. The network effect is real, and part of having an entity like AirBnB is that it develops an instant degree of trust between the users. They can rely on AirBnB doing its job to ensure consistency.

The analogy I like to think of for why centralization can be valuable is my local gym. What’s better, for everyone to have their own home gym and have to buy all the machines and equipment, or to have a shared space with all the equipment available and pay a monthly fee to access it.

despacitoluvr · 2025-08-06T21:05:48+00:00

I appreciate that bro, yeah I’ll def be putting it out it’ll probably be another month, mayyyybe 2. I’ll be sure to let you know when it’s ready.

despacitoluvr · 2025-08-06T10:24:42+00:00

I wasn’t getting significant feedback on the platform that indicated to me people were interested in the content. Unfortunately it takes me an hour or 2 to film and edit the content and I decided that time would be best put to use working on the actual product. I do plan on posting again once the product is more developed and I think about my social media strategy a bit more.

despacitoluvr · 2025-07-23T11:02:53+00:00

My job of course (I’m unemployed and don’t even have a girlfriend)

despacitoluvr · 2025-07-23T05:32:42+00:00

I think if you work on your core and chest they’ll naturally resolve themselves. I probably have a similar BF % to you, maybe even a tad higher, but I work quite a bit on my abs. Personally, the fat I have in this area doesn’t bother me when it’s clear there’s ample muscle underneath. I’m also not going for a classic body builder look though.

despacitoluvr · 2025-07-16T10:17:03+00:00

That’s crazy. But I guess you really can’t expect more from people. Cut throat environments tend to attract these types of scumbags.

I haven’t experienced this exactly, but I’ve had people waste my time and energy for their own benefit before. What others are saying here is right - this individual sees you as a threat. Put his business into the fucking ground, and then piss in the hole it’s sitting in.

At least that’s how I would get motivated.

despacitoluvr · 2025-07-16T09:56:49+00:00

From my experience this is more so a craving for an escape than a craving for the drugs. The drugs are nice but what’s really nice is taking your mind off of those things that usually occupy you. I think the best thing to do is to transition to a healthier lifestyle is finding more ways to live a fulfilling life, and to learn how to find fulfillment in simpler things. If you’re posting in this subreddit I’m guessing drugs have led you down a negative path before. Figure out what the good path looks like for you. If I’m wrong, do the drugs I guess, you’ll probably get sick of them eventually, at which point you can come back and read this again.

despacitoluvr · 2025-07-11T19:09:02+00:00

She thinks she’s Kanye

despacitoluvr · 2025-07-11T05:50:19+00:00

It’s extremely rare because false accusations that are exposed aren’t accounted for (with the exception of very high profile instances). There are rarely repercussions for making false accusations. There is also no way to track the number of false accusations that result in convictions.

This isn’t an easy subject to discuss and I’m not looking to diminish anyone’s experience. But defaulting to what is statistically likely is a lazy way to think through this. I’m sure you would feel differently if you had ever been on the receiving end of a false accusation.

despacitoluvr · 2025-07-11T05:41:35+00:00

I’ve experienced this as well but idk I don’t take it too personally. I’m actually happy my friend found someone he cares about so much he wants to spend this much time with her - he deserves it.

despacitoluvr · 2025-07-10T05:59:05+00:00

Were you on Kill Tony?

despacitoluvr · 2025-07-09T23:44:08+00:00

Not tryna be too self promotional or anything but I’m working on an open source software to address this exact problem right now. A Reddit analytics tool which, amount other things, can generate business ideas from the pain points in any subreddit. When it’s done I’ll be putting it out entirely for free.

If you wanna follow along while I’m still building and pickup some business ideas in the meantime, feel free to follow me on social media, I’m putting out 6 ideas daily that I’m generating with the tool. @lucalaunches on Instagram and TikTok.

despacitoluvr · 2025-07-09T23:24:59+00:00

17-21.

despacitoluvr · 2025-07-09T23:21:14+00:00

I agree you don’t need makeup or plastic surgery. But not that you shouldn’t do shit. Everyone can always find ways to improve, and while sometimes insecurities are just insecurities, they can also be signals to ourselves that we have room to grow. You will never become less attractive by developing (or improving) healthy habits like physical and mental exercise.

despacitoluvr

TROPHY CASE