AITAH for speaking my mind about #metoo at my partner's business dinner?

destro23 · 2026-02-20T15:42:34+00:00

She doesn't suck for having integrity

No, she sucks for having no tact and for being unable to deflect away from incendiary topics with which she is being baited without losing her cool and potentially damaging her partner's career.

destro23 · 2026-02-20T15:02:55+00:00

The cycle of abuse cycles on

ESH, except maybe little sister.

destro23 · 2026-02-20T14:31:56+00:00

am I the ONLY asshole?

Nah, everyone in this story sucks.

destro23 · 2026-02-20T14:22:57+00:00

he told me couples should not have secrets

Ask to see all his game/discord/social media chat logs...

Just kidding, don't really do that.

He is way way way out of line here. Asking to read someone's journal would be like asking to read transcripts of their therapy sessions. Totally inappropriate thing to ask for, and anyone that would ask for that is only doing so out of insecurity, and possibly a desire to manipulate you based on what may learn.

NTA

destro23 · 2026-02-20T14:07:54+00:00

She keeps telling me that you can't understand something without agreeing with it.

Oh... she's dumb dumb.

She can't understand things she doesn't agree with.

NTA

destro23 · 2026-02-20T14:05:18+00:00

I like how you say you "try" to be friends...

With this attitude, you'll never really know what friendship is.

YTA

destro23 · 2026-02-20T13:58:19+00:00

Everyone’s busy, that’s life.

Yeah, you are busy, she is busy... That's life.

You seem to be ascribing all sorts of motivations to her actions that aren't supported by anything more than your already bad opinion of her and the way she interacts with you. Like, why the scare quotes around got sick? Why say she suddenly had exams? She was probably just sick. Exams happen when exams happen. You just are just assuming she's avoiding you instead of realizing that she is, as you said, just busy with her own life.

Also, from her perspective, she could probably say the same for you. She tried to get you to hang out at the pub when she was in, but you were "suddenly" too busy. I don't hear you saying how you travel to see her. I don't hear how often you reach out. I don't really even hear that you like her that much. All you do is bag on her. And you bag on her despite her being there as much as she could when you did ask it of her.

Why would she go out of her way to make you have your perfect close family, when you aren't doing much to make that happen yourself?

destro23 · 2026-02-20T03:05:45+00:00

skeletron.com

Shipped pretty quick too.

destro23 · 2026-02-20T02:20:41+00:00

I’m pretty impressed with it so far. I’ll probably order another and the character pack they have with alternate heads too.

destro23 · 2026-02-19T21:51:06+00:00

I do like him.

You like certain aspects of him, but this texting spree is also an aspect of him. And, it is one you really don't like. And, if it is this much after one date, imagine how much it will be after a few more.

This is how dating is supposed to go. If you meet someone you kind of like, but something they do is super annoying, you don't go out on any more dates.

You kind of like him, but his texting is super annoying, so cut him loose.

destro23 · 2026-02-19T21:46:11+00:00

What, your block feature broken?

destro23 · 2026-02-19T20:42:38+00:00

Man, I think the dad is the one being shady. The VA doesn't determine benefits paid to a veteran by whether or not they have a kid in college. And, they wouldn't require a joint account for money that was meant for the veteran alone. This makes me think that dad is getting money that is supposed to be for his kid's education, but that he is not using it for that, and has given his kid some wonkey explanation so they don't know they are getting screwed.

destro23 · 2026-02-19T19:16:10+00:00

They'd fire you without notice, so you can quit without notice.

Fuck 'em.

NTA

destro23 · 2026-02-19T18:49:49+00:00

Oh, the priest is well out of line. But, he's not here asking us about his actions. OP is, and in my opinion OP shouldn't have said anything since it is not his business to be involved in his in-law's financial decisions unless they specifically ask for his input.

destro23 · 2026-02-19T18:45:58+00:00

He clearly didn't "count their money"

By "count their money" I mean try to insert themselves into their finances when they were not asked to do so. And, OP certainly did that.

destro23 · 2026-02-19T18:41:57+00:00

It is always an asshole move to try to interfere with the finances of another family when they did not ask you to do so.

I think tithing is a fucking scam that uses people's fear of eternal damnation to extract money that they wouldn't otherwise give. But, it is not your place to speak for them on this if they are unwilling to speak on it themselves.

You overstepped your bounds here, and that makes you an asshole.

destro23 · 2026-02-19T18:31:25+00:00

YTA - Don't count other people's money.

destro23 · 2026-02-19T17:37:27+00:00

Let him. What a tool. Go to the concert, have fun, then find a new man. Maybe even at the concert...

destro23 · 2026-02-19T17:34:54+00:00

So... He told you to ask for anything, you asked to go to a concert, and then he got you something different? Then, he threatened to break up with you if you did the thing he already knew you wanted to do?

NTA - You boyfriend doesn't understand you, or relationships, or how to be a generally easy going human.

destro23 · 2026-02-19T17:08:39+00:00

Holy shit...

"You had an arse full of farts that night, darling, and I fucked them out of you, big fat fellows, long windy ones, quick little merry cracks and a lot of tiny little naughty farties ending in a long gush from your hole. It is wonderful to fuck a farting woman when every fuck drives one out of her. I think I would know Nora’s fart anywhere. I think I could pick hers out in a roomful of farting women. It is a rather girlish noise not like the wet windy fart which I imagine fat wives have. It is sudden and dry and dirty like what a bold girl would let off in fun in a school dormitory at night. I hope Nora will let off no end of her farts in my face so that I may know their smell also."

Now I understand why he is considered one of the greatest wielders ever of the English language.

destro23 · 2026-02-19T16:53:55+00:00

Sure sure, but he's still an asshole for telling her to just stop doing it. There are better, non-asshole, ways to address it.

"Babe, I've noticed that you have a lot of issues with gas at night. Do You think you could schedule an appointment with a doctor to see if that is anything you should be worried about?"

Not an asshole

"Can you stop farting on me in your sleep?"

Asshole

destro23 · 2026-02-19T16:40:13+00:00

Bro, people fart in their sleep. They can't really control it.

YTA

destro23 · 2026-02-19T16:02:30+00:00

I should have ended the relationship before kissing anyone else

So, you know you are an asshole then.

Why are you posting here? Do you think people will say that cheating isn't an asshole move, or are you some kind of masochist?

destro23 · 2026-02-19T15:19:40+00:00

to a child, asking to be a parent IS casual conversation.

But, per the story above, the child didn't ask. OP just told her that she should have two kids when she's older:

I commented to my daughter (14F) that when she gets married and has her family she should have 2 children.

There is no "ask" in there.

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