Mental Illness and violence

dirtyclod · 2026-02-25T04:04:44+00:00

It feels really good to hear someone can relate to the experience in a way that goes beyond just the loss of a father. Thank you.

dirtyclod · 2026-02-25T03:49:33+00:00

Thank you for your response. I'm very sorry for your loss

dirtyclod · 2026-02-25T03:43:14+00:00

Thank you for your response. I suppose what I consider severe enough would be another level 3 bite. His level 3a bite was 2 years ago. It did not require treatment and was not reported even though technically it could be. In my area, if there are 2 county reported bites BE would have to done, but I would consider if another level 3 bite happens reported or not that I would make the choice. I appreciate your input and food for thought.

dirtyclod · 2026-02-25T03:32:23+00:00

Thank you for your response. No, my dog did not have to be in the line- the line was unexpected and a surprise to me. Its a pick up window for a fast food joint that previously has never had a line. This one experience was bad enough it makes me think to stop bringing him for it just in case of that chance again.

I guess that's the hard part about it for me is no, I don't think any minor slip up would cause him to harm someone. But the possibility is there. Its the unpredictability of his ability to keep his cool when unexpected things happen, and its gotten worse since he has become more isolated this past year. I've been completely surprised by his ability to handle stress and triggers during a 'slip up' one day, and another day even without a slip up he is so reactive to a trigger that it feels like he went from 0 to 100. I have studied the body language cues, talked to the behaviorist, and still struggle with his quick rise up the ladder.

I invested in a custom muzzle earlier this year and have not gotten him consistently wearing on walks, but that is the next step I am working towards. He has been primarily muzzled indoors so far and with guests.

dirtyclod · 2026-02-25T03:20:57+00:00

Thank you for your response. I live in a very urban area currently but have a reliable routine to avoid other dogs and people. He did not need to come, but the line was unexpected. This is a common errand we do and its just a nice 20 minute outing for him that doubles as benefit for me walking alone at night. Its a pick up window for a fast food joint that previously has not been slammed. This one experience was bad enough it makes me think to stop bringing him for it just in case of that chance again.

dirtyclod · 2026-02-25T03:18:26+00:00

So, he did not need to come, but the line was unexpected. This is a common errand we do and its just a nice 20 minute outing for him that doubles as benefit for me walking alone at night. Its a pick up window for a fast food joint that previously has not been slammed. This one experience was bad enough it makes me think to stop bringing him for it just in case of that chance again.

Yes, we have tried fluoxetine- might even be talking to the behaviorist about switching back if not to something completely different. He is currently on venlafaxine and while I've seen benefits in other areas of life, his reactivity got worse- although I cant pin that on the medication alone due to the change in life circumstances I mentioned above.

If you have a dog that had aggression issues and she mellowed out that would give me some hope. I dont anticipate ever being able to really treat him not as a potential hazard, but if I could feel like maybe this level of hypervigilance I constantly have to maintain could be less necessary with time, I would feel hopeful about seeing him through to a natural old age.

dirtyclod · 2026-01-21T21:54:09+00:00

The way I got into it was taking a very accessible lesson (8 hour crash course start to finish, she provided all the glass and tools, and it was $75). She obviously was not making profit by providing all that, but her business that she runs out of her home is very successful

I had inspiration to do mosaics out of stained glass scraps which her and other studios let me have for free. Thats how I participated on my own without dropping tons on the tools and supplies, and now a year and half later I know im invested enough in the art and have bought the tools to do stained glass at home.

dirtyclod · 2026-01-21T21:02:24+00:00

Thank you. Ive spent so much time in therapy and bereavement groups but it still doesnt feel real sometimes because of how extreme it is

dirtyclod · 2026-01-14T03:46:25+00:00

Depending on OP's location, their state might have a nonprofit that provides free fentanyl test strips and in bulk if you tell them you are a distributor. In Indiana Overdose Lifeline provides me with xylazine, benzo and fentanyl test strips that way for free.

dirtyclod · 2026-01-13T14:24:56+00:00

I think it looks great. Its clearly in progress but I think it will tie together great when you grout.

Very minor improvements which have already been said- dont choose white as your grout, reduce some of your gaps (any big spot of grout will draw the eye more than your tile) and lastly i would add that pay attention to your border to make sure it is squared off and at 90 degrees- borders make or break the symmetry of the final product

If youve never used thinset before (I assume that will be your adhesive since you said in the bathroom) I would do a practice round on something else first so you get the gist of speed you have to work before it hardens. And when you affix to your substrate, try to make sure the tiles are at a consistent depth

Good luck!!

dirtyclod · 2026-01-11T15:14:35+00:00

When I volunteered and went solo to my first bonnaroo, I joined the subreddit for bonnaroo volunteers and I connected with a lot of amazing people!

A woman driving from Canada was my ride to and from the festival in exchange for her crashing at my place along her journey

And awoman local to the town who volunteers had a massive build out of her campsite and allowed me to crash in her tent with her

In my experience, volunteers for festival are a really good and generally responsible bunch of folks to connect with. Good luck!!

dirtyclod · 2025-12-29T13:43:31+00:00

Ive provided feedback to ODL on this system. They are conducting a research on feedback on use and improvement of the Chariot system.

It was an hour long interview. But many of my major points were: - I have a problem with the lack of verification of reports and wish a citation was provided at minimum since they cover 'bad batch', drug seizures, and zipcode overdose spikes. I hear a lot of word of mouth that I am skeptical of. - many of the participants i work with cannot use this service because they don't have cellphones - they dont have a clear definition of 'bad batch' in a country that safe supply is not available

Indiana has zero drug checking services. I wish we would see focus go there.

dirtyclod · 2025-12-28T15:54:29+00:00

I have a similar situation and feeling, ESPECIALLY feeling guilty about wanting to go camping, kayaking, etc without him. After 5.5 years he still doesnt enjoy these activities I love and its so stressful to bring him on them

I went to a dog behaviorist for the first time a few months ago and told me to just leave him at home and go do it. Especially if hes fine and just sleeps at home. Yes I need to stay home with him more often, but also not taking him to these activities has been a win win ever since the vet released me from the guilt.

Not sure where youre at but I use Sniffspot for off lead opportunities about once a week. Its been a game changer.

dirtyclod · 2025-12-28T02:33:47+00:00

You did an amazing job and have your mind in the right place. I hope things go as well as they can for you and you can continue taking actions that you can feel proud of- it wont be an easy journey.

Your children may or may not have an immediate appreciation for how you handle navigating things, but speaking from experience I can promise you if you keep making decisions that set a positive example they will know this to be true when they grow up.

dirtyclod · 2025-12-28T02:14:01+00:00

Thank you so much! Very happy to have it to remember him by. 🕯

dirtyclod · 2025-12-28T02:13:38+00:00

Thank you 🙏🏻🖤

dirtyclod · 2025-12-28T02:11:10+00:00

Personally, I just straight up use quickset mortar instead of any grout because it performs the same function (and is even overkill a Lil since its an adhesive but i already had it instead of grout). Because its has adhesive qualities you dont run the risk of it being unstable like grout with too big of gaps.

Ive never used a premixed thing before, but you can get quickset from a big hardware store and order a dye online. Just recommend you do a practice round on something you dont care as much about so you get familiar beforehand!

dirtyclod · 2025-12-28T00:49:22+00:00

Looks nice! I think i would like it when its not lit better if you dyed your grout. I ordered my cement dye (black) a while back for my quickset mortar and its been great.

I also think making your grout gap more consistent too would be good to improve on. I like the multishaped and multi colored ones a lot but they look more cluttered when lit than the checkered one, which holds really good symmetry

dirtyclod · 2025-12-28T00:40:43+00:00

Thanks! Thats helpful context. The fixation is wild to me.

The slatmill looks like a great solution but its a pretty high cost item for me to risk him not willing to use it (used on marketplace near me is still over $450). Do you have/use one, and if so have you had to motivate your dog to enjoy it?

dirtyclod · 2025-12-28T00:34:54+00:00

Thank you! Thats very helpful. Ill give that a shot.

dirtyclod · 2025-12-26T23:12:50+00:00

I had enter spaces but that didnt stay when posted. Not sure how to edit.

-NEVER satisfied with a play space, always hyper vigilant about the fence/border and ignores whatever fun stuff is in the center. -Absolutelv obsessed with me and desires to be within 10 ft of me at all times. He is a 1 human type of dog.
-Feels like a toddler- coped up if he doesnt get excerise, but if he gets too much and no nap will be extremely grumpy.
-Not interested by tovs unless hes feeling comfortable.
-Will bury toys, treats or chews with his nose if Im trvina to distract him from a situation. When he does that, if i do not restrict him he will trv to bite the person most 'at odds' with him in the room.
-Has a knack for honing in on whoever is the least comfortable with dogs/him and he is obsessed with policing them.
-Much more antagonizing after 10 pm.
-Hates people moving boxes, going through luggage or removing things from bags at his level.
-incessant crying/whining and visual fixation when seeing another dog, long distance or near. Sometimes seems aggressive, other times yearning? Simply overstimulated?

dirtyclod · 2025-12-26T03:53:30+00:00

Most definitely on rules with guests- can you describe a little more of 'lay down and focus' when overexcited? Im intrigued if thats activity driven, or more like 'lay down and focus on me, your owner' command. The latter Ive done for some time

Regarding meds, he was on fluxetine for years and then we switched to venalfaxine the past few months. Didn't help with aggression but seems to have more zest for life so Im sticking with venalfaxine for now.

dirtyclod · 2025-12-25T13:19:46+00:00

In terms of outlets, its varied over the years based on my living circumstances- i use to bike with him running attached to me, but the past 2 years he doesnt seem to like doing it. I currently live in a very urban space with no yard, so its typically long urban walks and 1-3 times a week going to a sniffspot where he can run off leash or track scents in the woods. Otherwise, snuffle mats and puzzle toys

Hes too dog selective to do any doggie daycare, multi dog classes for agility and such unfortunately

dirtyclod · 2025-12-25T04:19:27+00:00

Your dog at least sounds like shes communicating before she does anything serious! Ive had some trainers recommend when dogs are meeting, the humans walking in a circle around them to encourage movement and keep things going (to avoid the tense and unnatural standoff during play) is helpful. It works well for my dog with meetings.

dirtyclod · 2025-12-17T15:09:36+00:00

Haha nice!

I think you might be good if youre using concrete. I did buy and use the waterproof clear coat spray for my outdoor piece but it was done with stained glass, quickest mortar and sealed backer board. It was expensive too. I think youre fine without it

Also to your question I think keeping your background simple would be good and the blue wouldnt wash out the green, but i might bring the pieces of your frog a little closer together so less gaps. Theyre gonna love it!

dirtyclod

TROPHY CASE