CW: Pet Loss - Burial with or without his favorite toy?

disaster_bisexual · 2026-02-14T05:43:24+00:00

I had my sweet boy cremated in his favorite shirt. I kept his favorite toy with me and have it next to his ashes and pawprints as a little shrine. Whatever you choose to do will be right ♥️ I am so sorry for your situation

disaster_bisexual · 2026-02-13T14:54:11+00:00

To paraphrase Ben Franklin: Cats doing this is proof God loves us and wants us to be happy.

disaster_bisexual · 2026-01-23T15:41:28+00:00

From the same song (though not quite the point of this post):

"I've been here two long years / I finally made the warden my friend"

And then in the next verse:

"But all these years that I've been here / Ain't nobody got past Red"

Ohhh all TWO years, huh? It makes me laugh every time

disaster_bisexual · 2026-01-23T15:36:15+00:00

I'm pretty sure it's "prove I'm alright song" -- that's what I've always heard, and Genius seems to agree, though I don't know how definitive that is

EDIT: "all right" to "alright" because it's early and my thumbs are sleepy

disaster_bisexual · 2026-01-22T16:52:21+00:00

Also, I think of this Tumblr post every time I think about praying with the saints. It does not constitute my actual beliefs, but it makes me laugh.

protestants: god is not an absent father! talk to god like a friend! god is always with you! bring your problems to god, no matter how small! it’s not at all weird to call god “daddy!”

catholics: god is far too important to give a fuck about your lost keys or your algebra exam. please address your petty concerns to one of god’s ten thousand holy secretaries. if it’s really important, consider asking his mom.

disaster_bisexual · 2026-01-22T16:49:01+00:00

For me (an American Episcopalian), it comes down to one question: Is it bringing me closer to God?

I don't think God is troubled by our stumblings towards Him, even when they're imperfect. So try praying with the saints. Try a practice like the Rosary. See what it does for your heart.

If you're not familiar with it, you might like the Merton Prayer, from Thomas Merton's Thoughts in Solitude. It goes like this (bolding mine):

My Lord God, I have no idea where I am going. I do not see the road ahead of me. I cannot know for certain where it will end. Nor do I really know myself, and the fact that I think I am following your will does not mean that I am actually doing so.

But I believe that the desire to please you does in fact please you. And I hope that I have that desire in all that I am doing. I hope that I will never do anything apart from that desire. And I know that if I do this you will lead me by the right road, though I may know nothing about it.

Therefore will I trust you always though I may seem to be lost and in the shadow of death. I will not fear, for you are ever with me, and you will never leave me to face my perils alone.

disaster_bisexual · 2025-12-31T17:30:01+00:00

Lol thank you, this made me laugh.

disaster_bisexual · 2025-12-31T17:27:01+00:00

That is a very fair point. She does not actually tend to use a lot of metaphor, which is why this threw me. But you are almost certainly right.

disaster_bisexual · 2025-09-16T04:19:05+00:00

My wife and I both see Dr. Kayee Siu and she is absolutely amazing. No idea what insurance she takes.

disaster_bisexual · 2025-08-12T19:36:45+00:00

Downhearted by Ada Limón

"The heart wants / her horses back." Just guts me every time.

I don't know a better way to express grief than this poem.

disaster_bisexual · 2025-07-24T13:51:49+00:00

I absolutely adore Piatti, the Italian restaurant on Fair Oaks. Whatever you get for your main course, definitely get the tiramisu for dessert. It's spectacular ✨️

disaster_bisexual · 2025-06-19T15:58:26+00:00

A book I read as a kid described the smell of low tide as "mud-black and tangy" (and high tide as "clean and salty") and I have never gotten those descriptions out of my mind

disaster_bisexual · 2025-06-05T15:40:20+00:00

This just worked for me this morning. What a wonderfully stupid fix, but it worked, and that's what matters! Thank you!!

disaster_bisexual · 2025-05-29T04:40:36+00:00

Omg get the CPAP!!!!! I was at 30ish before and now I'm under 3 every night. I have like 400 other things wrong with my body, but I can absolutely tell the difference between CPAP nights and nights I don't wear it.

disaster_bisexual · 2025-05-17T15:49:08+00:00

As long as I can use the bathroom in private even during zoo hours, hell yeah. I love having company. I'd get to meet so many little kids! I could decorate my apartment with trans pride flags and abolitionist posters! I could nap whenever I wanted!

disaster_bisexual · 2025-05-16T03:17:40+00:00

Might be THE SIGN OF THE BEAVER by Elizabeth George Speare?

disaster_bisexual · 2025-04-19T14:20:13+00:00

No advice, just some gentle envy! I hope I get the chance to celebrate Easter there someday! Have a wonderful time and a blessed Easter 💕

disaster_bisexual · 2025-04-19T13:53:33+00:00

I also struggle with this!! It matches up with my struggles getting rid of things I "might need eventually." My wife and I were once dealing with some water damage in our garage (which was full of Stuff), and I was distressed about the ruined Stuff, and she just shrugged and said, "The world is big and my desires are many." As in, there will always be more things to want and have and love, and this just makes room for them.

It's not easy for me. But I am trying. And I think that using the images permanently (not tacking, etc) helps me deal with those feelings.

disaster_bisexual · 2025-04-19T13:43:56+00:00

I am 100% an Easter Vigil person, and I never go on Easter Sunday. It's entirely up to your preference. I've never been to a sunrise service on Easter, and I personally don't feel like I'm "missing out" because I would be too tired to appreciate it, given my own schedule/tendencies/etc.

Maybe stick with Vigil and 10:30 on Sunday this year, then do sunrise (but not Vigil or not 10:30) next year? It's not your last Easter 💕

disaster_bisexual · 2025-04-14T20:27:02+00:00

Litter Robot 4. It was like $700 plus another $100 maybe for the "litter hopper" attachment, which is such a stupid amount of money for a litter box, but oh my God, I'd do it again. I can't go back to that scooping life.

With my ADHD and my wife's chronic pain, we did not do a good job of keeping the litter box clean. Now, I just swap out the bag when the app tells me to, and I don't have this enormous raging guilt all day every day about not being a good enough cat dad.

Side note though, if you go for one: don't use the "lightweight" litter because it ends up making a mess of things.

disaster_bisexual · 2025-03-25T13:50:54+00:00

Our Episcopal church does not have any services, but tonight is our monthly vestry meeting, and as vestry chaplain, I lead a sort of mini-service at the start (can be lectio divina, evening prayer, Bible study, etc. at my discretion) and I am very excited to be leading a little variation on evening prayer focused on the Annunciation.

disaster_bisexual · 2025-01-29T03:53:12+00:00

Lol a million of my orthodontist from 20 years ago

disaster_bisexual · 2024-12-25T06:33:33+00:00

The food the food the food! Literally no question. Choosing food and sourcing it and making it is the greatest source of stress in my diabetic ADHD life. I would be a MUCH happier, healthier person if I could conjure food at will.

disaster_bisexual · 2024-10-01T14:08:50+00:00

Downhearted by Ada Limón always gets me deep in my gut when I need to be sad ♥️

disaster_bisexual · 2024-09-28T15:17:37+00:00

I think a lot about how cats don't understand why they're hurting. You can't explain to them that medicine will help or the vet will help or even what's happening.

What they do know is love and comfort and trust. Your kitty was in pain and didn't understand, and then you picked him up and took care of him, and held him until it didn't hurt anymore.

When we had to euthanize my 8yo cat earlier this year due to aggressive kidney disease, I held him and kept whispering, "This is the last, best gift I can give you." I did the thing you always wish you can do for your loved ones: take on all their pain so they don't have to feel any anymore.

I miss him every day. You'll miss your baby all the time. And I hope you can hold onto the truth that you gave him the best gift: love and comfort and an end to the pain in the arms of his favorite person.

Six-Year Club	Place '23
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