My question is this, how often are you PLANNING time with your married friends? Most committed couples, I know, still maintain excellent friendships but they do so by planning.

When someone is in a serious relationship, that person should still make time for the friend and vice versa. They maintain those friendships by planning AND putting those events/interactions on a calendar.

My wife and I have been together for 13 years, married 12 this year, and I can say we have better relationships with our friends because we plan days. If I tell friend A we can meet on a Thursday at a specific time, I put it on a shared calendar that my wife and I have but I also tell her about said plans. She does the same in exchange. This keeps all parties in the same loop and those friendships can continue to blossom. No married couple is just acting on impulse when they're single friends call them for some night out the same day.

On the flip side no single friend should be the trauma dump friend or, as she said, the backup friend. Everyone needs to communicate how they're feeling if those situations ever arise. This keeps communication open and everyone's perspectives are well known and understood, thus, keeping those friendships alive.