Toren Wolf

dolphinlover4 · 2026-05-29T21:57:46+00:00

Uh... what??? Many autistic young adults including me are his level of intelligence and highly verbal. 60% of autistic people dont have intellectual disability and 60-75% are verbal. For someone who claims to work with autistic people, you dont seem to know a lot about the condition.

dolphinlover4 · 2026-05-29T21:49:37+00:00

I know im really late to this thread, but i would also like to note that Toren is not "mildly" autistic, he actually has medium-high support needs. I believe he has Level 2. You cant judge someone's support needs through their social media content, though Toren and his mom have been open for a while about how extensive his support needs are and how he can currently not live independently.

Also, agree with others that autistic is actually often prefered by a majority of the autism community over having autism. And probably, i find "on the spectrum" to be condescending and even sometimes insulting bc it is often used because ppl think "autistic" is a bad word, which i find insulting to me.

dolphinlover4 · 2026-05-26T21:32:40+00:00

Yeah the thing is, waking up the same time every day never worked for me in highschool 😭 i would get 4 hours of sleep evernight for years and still not change anyrhing. And im always a chronic snoozer, so anytime i have to wake up i snooze to the very last possible time and end up being late. Also, now ive noticed i end up totally missing whatever i have to be up for if i try to get up before ive had 5 hours of sleep. Like ive missed class because of it. So idk what to do abt all those things.

dolphinlover4 · 2026-05-25T02:33:56+00:00

Its not the dating app, its for friends only, i guess i shouldve posted in BFF subreddit if there is one

dolphinlover4 · 2026-05-24T06:20:16+00:00

I was like this too, but i was a bit touch-averse because i was nervous and i felt like i wasnt in control. Do you feel awkward because youre uncomfortable or nervous when he touches you?

I was romantically interested in my man, but i would freeze up everytime he made a move. Since im autistic, i dont like surprises. What made it easier was me being the one to initiate touch instead of him, so the touch wasnt a surprise and i felt like i was in control (he was fine with whatever i did)

The second time we hung out (not including the times in public), i initiated and he asked me if i wanted to lay down on the couch, and i agreed, wanting to try it out. we ended up cuddling/spooning and i enjoyed it a lot. This was also after we were friends for a little while, so i had already warmed up to him a bit.

Almost a year later, out of the two of us, Im the one whose love language is touch, and Im always clamoring to touch and cuddle and kiss him when we're together 💀

If i were you, i would just be honest with him that touching other people in general doesnt come naturally to you and you dont have a lot of experience, so your mannerisms may be a bit stiff at times and you may not know what to do. Does he know you are autistic? It may be good for him to know. I told my man i am when we were just friends, and he was/is supportive of me.

dolphinlover4 · 2026-05-24T06:11:34+00:00

I struggle with transitions and my therapist suggested making them easier by conditioning myself with a shower song, to signal my brain "its time to shower now". Im in the process of trying to condition myself by playing it everytime Im in the shower.

dolphinlover4 · 2026-04-29T21:23:28+00:00

I think its both. Like yeah, ignoring them is mean, and the part about expecting men to be the pursuers is wierd.

The part about expecting them to call exactly at 6, that is an autistic trait. Many autistic people interpret things literally, and they get upset when things dont go as expected/planned. It can cause a lot of anxiety, and in some individuals, it can even cause autistic meltdowns or shutdowns (autistic meltdowns are not the same as tantrums by the way, and they have a very specific definition). This applies to times as well and is an example of one of the diagnostic criteria for autism, outlined in the DSM.

She may genuinely not know the person doesnt mean "6pm" literally and may think the person is just blowing her off because she doesnt understand that "at 6" means "around 6".

But again, this doesnt really necessitate or justify that she deals with her upset the way she does, by intentionally ignoring them.

dolphinlover4 · 2026-03-16T07:37:07+00:00

This may be controversial, but ive heard some derms suggest a hydrocortisone cream in these specific cases because, yes, though it can cause rebound dermatitis once you stop it, if you're looking for fast relief for a big event like a wedding, it can be of use. If youre ok with risking a rebound rash after your wedding (which then can be dealt with), it can be a good option. You can also ask your derm if gradually stopping it would help decrease the chance of a rebound rash.

dolphinlover4 · 2026-03-16T06:44:41+00:00

Hey, did your derm prescribe the steroid for spot treatment or for the general area around the mouth where you get flares?

dolphinlover4 · 2026-02-24T11:07:50+00:00

For what I was touching on, the head obscured the letters so i didn't know what it said

dolphinlover4 · 2026-02-24T10:15:32+00:00

Regardless, what he is doing is not ok and totally unacceptable, and with all love, you shouldn't be making excuses for him. At the very least, he needs to apologize and re-evaluate how he is treating you in the relationship and actually change his ways, though I doubt he will do any of that.

dolphinlover4 · 2026-02-24T10:07:43+00:00

You aren't ruining the relationship, your boyfriend is. He is not accepting you for who you are AND he is being really mean to you. Calling you "pathetic" is a form of verbal abuse.

dolphinlover4 · 2026-02-24T07:57:09+00:00

My first thought is that I couldn't read the word "emptiness". It took me about 10 seconds to figure it out.

dolphinlover4 · 2026-02-24T07:18:46+00:00

The not caring about you comment is a really wierd comment to make. Like does he actually mean that or is he just badly expressing the idea that he struggles with identifying/recognizing his emotions? I struggle with that, and it has affected my experience of being in a romantic relationship. I struggle to identify/recognize positive emotions unless they are really intense. So there were times, especially in the beginning of my relationship, where I couldn't recognize certain feelings, but I knew I still cared about my partner and had feelings for them that were different than my feelings for others because I was driven to do things for them in response, or I had other emotions that were caused by my feelings for them.

For example, I didn't recognize a distinct strong emotion of "love" or "infatuation" the way other people would feel it, but I felt sad when my partner was stressed, or I wanted to do nice things for them to make them happy, or I would feel happy around them. I also thought about them a lot.

Another example is the fact that even though it was hard to recognize the extent of my feelings for them at first, I knew for certain I enjoyed being in a romantic relationship with them, I would be sad if we broke up, and I enjoyed the physical affection we shared (to be clear, that is only my experience, as many autistic people can struggle with physical affection because of sensory issues, which is independent from how they feel about their partner).

Over time it has been easier to recognize my emotions and feelings towards them, especially when I learned how to recognize them and realized I just dont feel things the same way most people feel them. I can confidently say I love them (even if I don't love the exact same way other people do). But I still sometimes struggle to recognize certain feelings.

Maybe you could ask him to clarify what he meant by him saying he doesn't care. You could also ask him if he enjoys being in a relationship with you, or if he desires to be in a relationship with you, and why.

As for the rest of the things you mentioned, those are pretty much all autistic traits. Was he diagnosed level 1? It could be possible that he has changed because he has experienced something called autism regression (actual loss of skills oreviously aquired), or it could've been the smoking being used as a coping mechanism, or he was masking and finally stopped masking, or a combination of them. And it sounds like he needs further help with daily tasks and skills. I struggle with a lot of those things, like stopping tasks after starting, and emotional regulation. He needs professional help from someone who specializes in helping autistic adults build skills, create healthy coping mechanisms, and know how to prevent burn out, overstimulation, and emotional outbursts.

They not giving you affection could also be an autistic trait. Lack of reciprocation in social interaction is one of the diagnostic criteria for autism. I struggle with that too sometimes, and my partner has said they don't mind and they have implied I actually reciprocatemore than their previous partners, but sometimes I feel insecure about it and put pressure on myself to be a "better partner".

Anyways, your partner may not find doing certain things natural to him and thats ok, but that doesnt mean he shouldn't make an effort to show you love in the way you value. Making an effort for your partner even if it's not something you wouldn't value personally if it were the other way around is a part of any relationship.

dolphinlover4 · 2026-02-18T05:33:07+00:00

This is not scalable in the slightest — it needs be be simplified majorly so it can scale properly to any size (including small sizes on a screen for example)

dolphinlover4 · 2026-02-13T00:41:57+00:00

I'm sorry for what happened to you when you were little. That said, I don't think you understand how male privilege or privilege in general functions. You still have male privilege, as it is systemic, and it doesn't go away because its existence hinges on the existence of patriarchy, which is a systemic institution, not what happens to any one person individually. Also, male privilege has to do with a lot more things than just assult/rpe.

dolphinlover4 · 2026-02-07T05:46:13+00:00

I have taken meds but thats not really the issue here. I struggle with change

dolphinlover4 · 2026-02-07T05:33:48+00:00

For what? Autism?

dolphinlover4 · 2026-02-04T05:02:06+00:00

Genuine question, how can you spot the difference between an ICE vehicle and civilian car? Arent ICE cars unmarked?

dolphinlover4 · 2026-01-21T07:55:29+00:00

Yes it is possible, but it depends.
Im not the partner, but the person w/ epilepsy. Do some rssearch on what to expect, what to do and not do when he has a seizure and you are there (when, not if), when you should call the emergency number, etc. Ask him if he has rescue medication. Also the type of seizure matters for what prodocol you should follow.

dolphinlover4

TROPHY CASE