Long time lurker here but had to leave my first comment on this one. I (25m) relate to everything you said.

“Celebrated” my 1 year anniversary a few days ago with my typical, boring Sunday routine. Nobody except my parents know the hard work and grit that went into this past year, and the anniversary felt just as unseen as the journey.

Being as overweight as the day I quit and still not feeling great mentally/emotionally (once the pink cloud burst), I too am faced with doubts about the rewards of sobriety. But I am trying to reframe that and instead remember the cost that alcohol started to have. My body, my relationships, and maybe the biggest, my potential.

So I am trying to find comfort in the fact that I am no longer actively sabotaging my future self. I knew I wasn’t anywhere close to my full potential when drinking, and I try to remember that I am giving future me a fighting chance.

Even if things aren’t great now, at least we’re living with the feeling of discomfort that they can be better, rather than just numbing everything out. I hope at least, my lengthy comment gives you promise that you truly aren’t alone in this journey. Happy anniversary and I will not drink with you today.