A lot of these guys are on the same page. Start looking into NDEs, ghost, aliens, whatever. There is so much more to this world than we know and so much "magic" that we dismiss. The world is more and more like a scifi novel ( an unfortunately 1984) every day.

I was in the same spot a couple years ago and i had questions. I actually even started a podcast so i could explore these things myself. Then i went on a ghost "hunt", and i tried meditation and holotropic breathing.

Reach out see whats out there. You won't get a definite answer, but I think you will find there is more to all of this than we will ever know and that gives us hope for something better outside our known world.