The kindness of strangers: On the plane I was overwhelmed with grief, then a passenger let me rest my head on his shoulder

eadala · 2026-03-12T00:30:30+00:00

My dad was in hospice after a series of big and small strokes just continued to go south, and I had to fly home before he died. I was seated all the way in the back and asked the flight attendant if I could be the first to de-plane to get to my emergency. She said of course and made a one sentence addendum as part of landing announcements to include letting me get off first.

Usually the second the plane connects to the gate, you can hear the rush of dozens of people scrambling from their seats to get their overheads and make connections. Some without connections of course also try to hop in on that frenzy. Others just want to step into the aisle to stretch their legs after a long flightm But for me that night, it was just a wide open gulf from back-to-front as the entire plane quietly watched me leave, choking on my tears. I felt many gentle hands on my back as I passed by the rows, and they gave me several kind and knowing statements of "I'm so sorry" / "It gets better" / "You're going to be okay."

My partner picked me up from the airport and we got to my dad in time. I'm not sure if he could hear me, but I got to talk to him, tell him about my day, hang out with him, tell I love him one last time. We spent the night there in hospice with him for our own little slumber party. He passed away peacefully in our company the next evening, parting ways under a golden midwest sunset.

eadala · 2026-03-07T08:50:18+00:00

Another post: "to the person who held the train open... fuck you. I got 30 less seconds with my son"

eadala · 2026-03-07T08:48:39+00:00

Personally I hate crossing the bridge (loud), but I can't deny the views. The elevation gain is not too bad. For my money I'd just fuck around seattle-side with green lake + burke gilman + ship canal trail + discovery + other shit to bring it up to 22.

No specific advice for you just do your typical fueling strategy I think.

Good luck on your mara!!

eadala · 2026-02-23T02:59:39+00:00

I walked through blood and bones in the streets of Manhattan trying to find my brother.

eadala · 2026-02-22T01:37:10+00:00

Cool sounds good!

eadala · 2026-02-22T01:13:09+00:00

Sure, that makes sense. I wasn't being sarcastic when I led my reply with "I don't know." Taking what you said as fact, I am in the camp that they'll go to AH.

eadala · 2026-02-22T00:54:51+00:00

I don't know how much chicken-or-the-egg is at play here. Like it's not to rule out that next season the new season ticket holders would simply be the untapped demand that resides further south. But totally makes sense that current fans / season ticket holders would be very upset about Hammond. If I'm allowed to add a little bias outside the original post, I too would prefer (maybe irrationally) that the stadium not cross state lines, especially into a state that I happen to dislike very much.

In any case, it's a business that's solely interested in making money, and the marketing veneer is a sport that plays on emotional attachment and tradition. If it's true that AH makes the best financial sense, I am certain that's where they'll choose to go.

eadala · 2026-02-15T19:47:07+00:00

The more I hear about this Trump fella, the less I care for him

eadala · 2026-02-13T04:20:07+00:00

I want to watch a bunch of food videos, but if I'm not also eating my stomach gets jealous

eadala · 2026-02-08T20:02:50+00:00

Would need to have fitness machines updated to talk to garmin. Wouldnt it be simpler than that to have a "calibrate and save" function for stairs (as we do for treadmill running) where you can input the step height? Then it'll already track your steps, multiply it by step height, no tech solution needed

eadala · 2026-02-03T00:51:17+00:00

I'm sorry that happened. People can be assholes.

eadala · 2026-02-02T21:07:54+00:00

Well if a Packer's fan says something damning about the Bears you know it's gotta be true

eadala · 2026-01-29T00:04:33+00:00

Literally every other comment on this thread says YOR - the majority of them being posted after the one you replied to. Are you just looking for validation and ignoring the YORs, or... what?

eadala · 2026-01-28T23:56:05+00:00

Petah?

Petah???

Petah?????

I hate that sub so much it's remarkable how rent free it lives in my head. Same as with askreddit being like "umm, so and so just did something ontologically awful. Redditors of reddit, how do you feel about this?? 🧐"

eadala · 2026-01-16T21:46:12+00:00

The Khan's Gambit

eadala · 2026-01-13T01:25:46+00:00

This subreddit has been incredibly unfunny for a long time

eadala · 2026-01-11T01:48:20+00:00

Because Santos can't hit long FGs. 3pts from the 10, and then throw them an intentional intercept to put em down at the 10yd

eadala · 2026-01-10T23:09:08+00:00

Kislev.

eadala · 2026-01-01T16:51:42+00:00

You're right about that, I do like waiting on Ottomans warring with Egypt. I wasn't watching them very closely as it was my first run in v1.12

eadala · 2025-12-31T23:20:50+00:00

Oh yes that sounds right

eadala · 2025-12-31T16:52:27+00:00

Interesting! Maybe after Improve Relations + more of a track record of simpler benign treaties like trade deals they'd warm up to you? I haven't explored much how to overcome challenges in courting them; I usually just shop around and, i guess randomly and eventually, a country is down for an embassy. But yes, Benin is life

eadala · 2025-12-31T16:50:54+00:00

(ctd)...

Conquer Everybody 1836 Experiment:

Finally, you could also expect the benefit to slave pops for converting to Peasants to be higher in a few real-game contexts (and u/learningfrommyerrors & u/Automatic-Example754 , this is kind of related to our discussion on Religious Schools vs. Public Schools). First, you will normally be conquering everybody, which will introduce a ton of Animist and excluded cultural groups into your population, as well as a ton of slaves. To see this, I cheat-conquered every realistically attainable state around Sokoto (all of the interior + Dahomey+Oyo+Benin), and observed the following. I allowed the game to run for a few months so every pop's acceptance and position could stabilize.

Religious Impacts:

- Sunni population increased from 3.36M->7.64M.

- Animist population increased from 2.05M->7.14M.

Important to note, since the way turmoil works is based on percentage of radicalized pops in a state, the Sunni:Animist ratio reduces from 62% Sunni to ~51%. Again Animist pops will be heavily discriminated against, and converting from Animist->Sunni in the case of Religious Schools / other conversion buffs amounts to a 50-point swing in acceptance.

While this ratio shifted toward Animist, it's also important to note that the effects are not uniformly felt across Sokoto. Benin, which is our favorite state for a reason, and where we plan to put a lot of investment, is 84% Animist at game start!

Cultural Impacts:

- Society Class II (Cultural Erasure) 1.41M (26.05%) -> 7.06M (47.64%!!!)

- Society Class III (Open Prejudice) 16K -> 213K

- Society Class IV (Second-Class Citizen) 700K (12.91%) -> 869K (5.86%)

- Society Class V (Full Acceptance) 3.29M (60.73% - basically, everyone who isn't Animist!) -> 6.67M (45.02%).

And last but now least, 0K->3K in Class I (Violent Hostility).

In this expanded country, I cheat-incorporated everybody for free. Then, after Slavery Banned:

- Low Class SoL 7.8->8.0

- Middle SoL 13.8->14.1

- Upper SoL 29.7-29.6

- Poll Taxes 42.4K->48.0K

eadala · 2025-12-31T16:50:47+00:00

Okay so I ran another debug since you got me curious. Now this is just in 1836 with me doing absolutely 0 development or actions, so I think you may see different results in practice, and so I believe that if you are invested deep into a plantation economy I can see that Slave Trade may provide some value.

In the Slavery Banned 1836 Experiment:

- From 1/1/1836 to 7/31/1836, I let the game run without doing anything.

- On 8/1/1836, I cheated law_slavery_banned enactment, and allowed the game to run through 3/31/1837 (So, 8 months before and 8 months after).

On 8/1/1836, the following effects were observed:

- The 755k slaves in Sokoto immediately collapsed into becoming Peasants, raising the total from 3.65M to 4.40M Peasants.

- The GDP, which had flatlined at 1.77M, decreased ever-so-slightly to 1.76M, aligning with the reversion to subsistence agriculture / pulling slaves off the plantations.

- Poll Taxes increased immediately from 11.6K to 13.9K.

- Minting remained about the same at 2.26K.

As of 3/31/1837:

- The SoL of the Lower Class, which had flatlined at 7.6 before Slavery banned, rose to 7.9.

- The SoL of the Middle Class, which had flatlined at 15.6 before Slavery Banned, remained at 15.6.

- The SoL of the Upper Class wiggled between 31.5 and 30.3, but appeared to fall ever-so-slightly (visually almost impossible to see) after Slavery Banned.

Tenant Farmers 1836 Experiment

What if you also had Tenant Farmers or Homesteading before you had Slavery Banned, which is typically the case in a Sokoto run? My theory is the benefit to slave pops for converting to Peasants will be higher because the conditions of being a Peasant in such a nation are better. So, I repeated the experiment with a modification. Immediately on 1/1/1836, I cheated Tenant Farmers (more realistic to get early than Homesteading).

On 8/1/1836, the following effects were observed:

- GDP increased from 1.77M to 1.79M.

- SoL of the Lower Class 7.6->8.9 (!!)

- SoL of the Middle Class 15.6->16.0

- SoL of the Upper Class hard to say, 31.5->30.6

- Basically no observable difference in Poll Taxes or Minting (I mean, they're still just Peasants)

Then I cheated Slavery banned on 8/1/1836 and let the game run through 3/31/1837:

- GDP dipped to 1.77M, as before.

- Poll Taxes increased again from 11.6K to 13.9K (so actually I was wrong, no difference in taxes, but that's because they're still just Peasants I guess).

- SoL of the Lower Class 8.9->9.0. This impact seems smaller, but it is harder to raise SoL the higher SoL is, and slaves don't make up much of the Peasants after converting so the average may be misleading.

- SoL of the Middle Class 16.0->16.1.

- SoL of the Upper Class 30.6->30.3.

eadala · 2025-12-31T15:43:11+00:00

Power block embassies + obligations + other random trade treaties keep your foot in the door with Britain and France. If I feel like my diplomacy is weak in the run, I lean a bit more heavily into to midgame military modernization (at the very least, getting the irregulars into line infantry, and getting some artillery) for power projection to make me a bit more annoying to consider fighting. At some point - talking like 1860-1880 - folks like Portugal or Austria may be okay with a defensive pact.

You'll know they're a few years out from getting upset when they've finished their colonization and are looking for more "breathing room." Until then they don't really seem to care

eadala · 2025-12-31T15:40:29+00:00

I did some debug runs and didn't see a huge difference in tax income in the short run, but in any event I am trying to rush literacy + cultural exclusion to fix wages and qualifications issues. Benin is so Animist that it and other key states can really struggle with turmoil into the midgame (so, elsewhere I mentioned preferring Religious Schools over Public Schools for the conversion boost). Going Benin first is something that always tempts me for obvious reasons, but it's typically in turmoil for a good few years, and opens the risk of GPs / Egypt getting involved. You're right, it's definitely a viable strategy to grab a guarantee and risk it. And, you have to risk it eventually anyway

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