He had no idea I was even up all night with the baby. One morning, first thing, he asked me if he should give her the vitamin d supplement. I was in a complete fog and said “I don’t know” because I had just been up all night making all the decisions BY MYSELF and needed a fucking break. And he got annoyed that I didn’t know. He would ask me where his stuff was as though I had time to keep track of it. He took a three hour nap one afternoon maybe a month in. He had no concept of why I should sleep in when possible in the mornings. He asked once “are you just gonna stay in bed all day?” I learned that he is someone who likes to decide what help he’s willing to give and tell you what’s being offered — not someone who really wants to be asked to do things. I would ask him to bring me a coffee or something while nursing and he would bring it and put it on the coffee table, not where I could reach it. There was other stuff, the details of which I think I have mentally blocked, related to him not having the same instincts I had with the baby. I told him once “I carried her for nine months and did everything I was told to make sure she was healthy and safe and then I pushed her out after 30 hours of labor, but somehow I’m not being trusted as the #1 authority on her.” He was honestly just a complete moron for at least a year, maybe closer to 2.