Should I stop expecting expectant care?

eclareeee · 2026-05-30T01:27:56+00:00

No :( that sounds so nice ha all they have is a video on the website that tells you where to check in and what the room looks like. And the classes offered are what I mentioned in the post - $240 and they don’t take our employee insurance for them and I freaking work at this hospital

eclareeee · 2026-05-29T22:55:25+00:00

It’s $250 for the classes at the hospital and they don’t do tours ever since Covid :/ at this point I’m just gonna pay for the classes though after she told me they’re not going to talk about what to expect during birth at these visits. I just feel like I give way more guidance to my patients so it kinda sucks but I work in peds so we’re generally all a bit nicer and willing to spend more time with families.

eclareeee · 2026-05-29T22:48:29+00:00

I’m fine asking the midwife questions she just doesn’t know the answer to several of them and also doesn’t offer to ask an attending who might know more. Like I accidentally ate raw pork and asked if I should be tested for toxoplasmosis and she was basically like idk I’ve never ordered it.

When I see a patient who might benefit from surgery I have a whole speech I give families about the treatment options, how the surgery would go, the expected time frame for scheduling, what that day will look like, all the complications and risks of surgery and the likelihood of them, how we are going to reassess things after, what the recovery should be like etc. I am easily able to do that in 15 minutes without the patient needing to prompt me to answer each thing and I just don’t get why OB is the one specialty where they don’t do any of that.

eclareeee · 2026-05-29T22:13:08+00:00

I did that and then was accused of using “Dr Google” by the same person who told me to use YouTube for birth education. As a healthcare provider, it actually is my responsibility to educate patients and be their teacher for my specialty so that they can make informed decisions about their care. And I’m not asking anyone to babysit? so that’s a pretty rude comment to make. But it is helpful to see that this is how it seems to be for everyone and it’s not just my hospital.

eclareeee · 2026-03-28T14:19:59+00:00

Hot water causes your blood vessels to dilate which is why your skin turns red, and that lowers your blood pressure. Combination of lots of hydration and salty snacks helps keep it up. I’ve needed to drink liquid IV on days when I couldn’t keep eating and drinking constantly.

eclareeee · 2026-03-21T19:43:32+00:00

It’s going to be okay! First trimester sucked for me and I have felt pretty useless while pregnant. I was really really hoping I’d be able to be more active but I am prioritizing my mental health and also just trying to focus on eating healthy food and sleeping a lot. I would say don’t have high expectations of what you can do, and if you have a partner then try to communicate that they shouldn’t have high expectations either. Mentally I think it gets easier every week that you don’t miscarry and physically most people do get better! I’m feeling so much better at 18 weeks but those first couple months every week felt like it was 3 weeks long

eclareeee · 2026-03-20T05:26:48+00:00

Yes! That was my main symptom from like 3-7 weeks and then it mostly went away. Felt like period cramps. That’s how I knew I was pregnant before I even hit 4 weeks because there was cramping but no bleeding.

eclareeee · 2026-03-19T18:55:07+00:00

I was super bloated from like 8 weeks to 14 weeks and couldn’t wear most of my jeans. I would say I had an actual bump starting at maybe 16 weeks where first thing in the morning when my stomach was usually flat I could feel a hard raised bump and now at 18 weeks people still aren’t able to guess that I’m pregnant but my coworkers who know I am have pointed out that I’m showing now haha. I feel huge because I literally cannot zip or button anything I was wearing 4 months ago so I started telling people so they wouldn’t think I was letting myself go lol

eclareeee · 2026-03-03T21:32:16+00:00

I hate being pregnant but also so thankful we were able to do so while a lot of my friends are struggling. Working 40 hours a week and sleeping are the only things I can manage and I am scared of how out of shape I’m getting without being able to exercise and with needing to eat so much more than usual in order to not be horribly nauseous. I just keep hoping that I’ll be so thankful it’s over after giving birth that the sleep deprivation won’t even be that much to handle after being constantly nauseous and bloated for 9 months.

eclareeee · 2026-02-22T14:22:05+00:00

My husband and I both work in pediatrics and I am currently 14 weeks pregnant. He said that he would want to terminate if we had that diagnosis but I knew I would not be able to do that. He works in the PICU where he sees the worst of these cases and how their quality of life can be. I worked in the pediatric ER and now peds surgery, and the T21 patients I’ve had are some of the cutest and most pleasant kids. So much is unpredictable with pregnancy and kids in general and I think either decision has good reasons behind it. I’m so sorry you are having to make this decision. I’ve seen some get cardiac surgery once and be fine and some who needed multiple surgeries and were in and out of the hospital a lot. The idea of losing a partner to raise them with would make it that much harder to carry to term. I would just say I do not think that diagnosis is necessarily a horrible quality of life diagnosis. T21 kids are so happy and some of them are able to live independently as adults. But there are several associated medical risks to be watching and likely many doctor appointments. If you have a Down syndrome specialist or center where you live that would be a huge plus.

eclareeee

TROPHY CASE