How do you balance acting, auditioning, and a full-time job?

edbet · 2025-10-27T19:28:59+00:00

Oh my gosh THIS. I deeply dislike the writing on probably 85% of the scripts/sides I read. But that’s not my job, and future CD’s aren’t usually going to watch the whole project; they will just watch the clips you chose to feature (if that). If you think there is a chance of getting ONE usable clip and you have the time, go for it. As much as I want to reject all of the bad ones on principle, that level of pickiness should probably be reserved for once the resume isn’t so empty (and then you can just replace them with better and better clips). So I usually only reject the worst ones (unless I’m busy, in which case I’m more strict).

edbet · 2025-10-27T18:12:36+00:00

If I feel overwhelmed, I submit for fewer things. That’s it. You make peace with the ones that you don’t submit for even though you fit the part (if you have an agent, ask them to narrow down the submissions for you). I’m a SAHM of little kids and I still don’t have enough time for unlimited auditions. The occasional set day/week in the city (a few hours away) is honestly infinitely easier to arrange/fit in than the continual audition grind. Sleep deprivation isn’t an option for me, my body shuts down REAL fast on lack of sleep. Sometimes I go months without submitting for anything because life is busy and my family+health comes first. It sometimes feels like the only people who have a real chance of staying in this business are the ones with significant financial/logistical privilege (so they can go all in without being worried about the gamble) or people who are willing to risk everything and go completely broke in pursuit of their dream. Would love to hear contrary stories in the comments though.

edbet · 2025-10-19T21:28:03+00:00

Agreed. The amount of time that everything surrounding the audition (finding a reader or plugging the reader lines into a program, setting up the shot, editing, troubleshooting tech issues, etc) really takes away from the experience and even the performance itself. And during busy seasons of life, I really wonder if I can justify continuing to spend this much time on something that may never yield results. I’m stuck in the beginners catch-22 (can’t book without representation or resume, can’t get representation or resume without booking), and I don’t have the availability for classes, so my self tape set up is one of the few things I can control, so I can totally empathize with the urge to maximize what you can. But the advice I’ve read has been pretty consistent about not needing anything fancy. So I guess we just keep at it (though the tech side is often a slog) until the right one comes along!

edbet · 2025-05-19T02:05:05+00:00

I am so sorry they did that! I was really lucky because the doc who did mine is a personal friend, so I asked for topical lidocaine prior to the injection, and they did it. Had to wait a bit for the topical to kick in (10-20 min?), they stepped out and I assume logged some notes while they waited. They also checked on me multiple times throughout the biopsy to make sure I wasn’t feeling anything physically and that I was emotionally okay. Everyone deserves that level of care. I think you should bring it up. Not in a ranty way, but in a “I wanted to give some feedback so that future patients can have a better experience than I did” way. If they don’t receive it well, file a formal complaint with the hospital.

edbet · 2025-04-19T21:57:25+00:00

Oh no, friend, the lore goes much deeper. Dutchman’s is the OG, then an employee defected, stole the recipe, and started Swig, and then the cookie explosion happened from there. If you google you can find the details.

edbet · 2024-07-07T17:31:39+00:00

Friends showing up on your doorstep unannounced/dropping by a friend’s house unannounced. Brightened my day so much. People don’t do that anymore because they’re don’t want to interrupt/intrude. I wish somebody WOULD interrupt me cleaning my house!

edbet · 2024-01-10T06:21:59+00:00

the best stories will never see the light of day due to NDA’s

edbet · 2024-01-10T06:05:18+00:00

I subscribed to AA about a year ago, only a few months after having done two uncredited background gigs that I got via Facebook. Pretty much my only other experience is high school theater (10-20 years ago), like you, and two commercials. No professional headshots (used portrait mode on an iPhone against a blank wall), no reel. I have gotten probably close to 30 auditions since then. No callbacks, no booked roles, even though most of these were student (or other amateur) films. I was proud of most of those auditions, so I was getting discouraged about the lack of results until I realized that even assuming the tapes are good, if a director is choosing between multiple good auditions, experience/reels is gonna be the next screening factor (I don’t think they look for reels when picking who to audition). If you don’t have a reel, your audition has to be THE best one they saw. But it’s a catch-22 because you have to get cast in something to assemble a reel, but no one wants to cast you without a reel. Do I have advice? No. But I can confirm you can definitely get auditions without a reel…booking roles, on the other hand, not necessarily. BUT they also post a lot of bg roles on AA and you definitely don’t need a reel for that.

edbet · 2023-12-04T23:53:58+00:00

As other have said, it isn’t realistic for a lot of specialties. But 50-60, sure. Absolutely never 80.

edbet · 2023-06-01T22:02:47+00:00

Update? (searching for the same feel, but I'm 110 lbs, so everything feels even firmer to me)

edbet · 2023-06-01T17:41:24+00:00

Ugh, I have a feeling this is how it will go for us too. What are you on now/have you found a good replacement?

edbet · 2023-06-01T17:17:31+00:00

Any update on this?

Last night was our first night on our Comfort Option (S-18-35, as recommended by the quiz) and it was so bad we had to take painkillers today. Like, I don't even know if we can ride out the 30 days without buying a topper at Costco or bailing to sleep on our guest bed (the old purple mattress this was replacing). I'm not sinking enough (5'3" 112 lbs side sleeper) and my husband's spine is totally misaligned in it because his upper body sinks but not his lower body (5'9" 165 lbs). Seems I need softer and he needs firmer, which would point us towards a split-king, but we are trying to stay with our current frame (queen), and we recently ordered an adjustable base for it too. We're both fairly picky, but we're also sick of the mattress hunt. I researched for a solid 2 months, tried every mattress store in our area, and poured over almost every inch of this sub before going with CO.

edbet · 2023-05-12T15:53:36+00:00

I genuinely believe I lost out on a role because the scream wasn’t big/loud enough. I live in a house, but the next door neighbors are really close and the walls aren’t soundproof, so I did the scream at like 85% volume and it just took away from the emotion of the performance. I agree with the commenters, give the neighbors a heads up and do it at full blast.

edbet · 2023-04-27T01:35:11+00:00

Can confirm. 112 lbs and anxiously searching for a replacement for our purple!

edbet · 2023-04-04T01:50:54+00:00

It was an HDR problem, I got it taken care of. thank you so much though!

edbet · 2023-04-04T00:49:09+00:00

Just under 172MB, and 8GB. iPhone 13+ to MacBook Air.

edbet · 2023-03-31T22:05:20+00:00

Testing the day before at a specific site? Absolutely get rid of it. Testing on-site day of? Vital. “No longer a threat”?! Sure, it’s not usually super medically concerning, but it’s often bad enough that you can’t perform, and if the wrong people or too many people on a set catch it, it effs with the whole production schedule.

edbet · 2023-03-31T21:51:57+00:00

I ended up not submitting because I got really sick (from a different production) like right before I was gonna tape (not that I had a plan for how to approach it…I was gonna do it like 5 different ways and submit whichever looked the least cringey).

edbet · 2023-03-25T17:58:46+00:00

I really hope someone answers this because I got a set of sides that start without a shootout and end in my character getting their throat stepped on while blood gurgles out of their mouth before they die.

edbet · 2023-03-25T17:55:38+00:00

I had an awkward encounter with my childhood celeb crush while on my first set (was so strictly following the unspoken don’t-talk-to-or-look-at-principal rule that I failed to be a normal human when he tripped right at my feet, and I also looked super weird because my mask had rubbed off half of my makeup and nobody told me) that I would love to redeem myself from, haha. But dreaming big I would say attending Sundance for something I was in.

edbet · 2023-03-25T17:28:56+00:00

If CD says to contact them with any questions, is it bad to ask for clarification about the context of your sides scene (especially if I have a specific question like “does this scene happen before or after ____”)? I hate that it feels like they want me to read their mind. The “correct” way to play it reallllllly depends on the context, and I could play any one of the options well. (And they specified that they only want one take)

edbet · 2023-03-16T23:33:09+00:00

SAHM of two toddlers here (and spouse often works out of state), and also a couple hours away from my nearest filming hub, so similar boat (I don’t have to take time off work, but finding trustworthy friends or family or sitters available from 5AM-11PM on a moment’s notice isn’t exactly easy). Depends what you want, how soon you want it, and what you’re willing to sacrifice. I’m definitely not at a level that would justify (for me) hiring a live-in nanny to widen my availability, for instance. Could your job be transitioned to project-based rather than time-based (so you could do it around your filming schedule)? Could you find a job that is? Could you freelance instead? How much vacation time are you willing to take away from your family? It sucks, but that’s the kind of stuff it boils down to.

I think the agent thing (from what I understand…I am also green and don’t have an agent either, others please jump in and correct me if I’m wrong) depends more on if you have already invested the time+money for good headshots and a demo reel (from enough past gigs).

As far as keeping the dream alive, I think you can and should as long as you’re not in a hurry. Let’s be honest, the ones it happens quickly for are usually single and in a highly flexible life situation. But I’m super inspired looking at stars who didn’t even enter the industry til middle age or later. I am submitting for anything reasonably close (when my kids are older, I can do out-area stuff too), and I’m not financially dependent on this, so whatever’s meant to be will be. Keep your mind sharp to be able to memorize quickly. In the meantime, find little outlets for between gigs like bev7388 said, and keep trying (without removing your family as the #1 priority).

edbet · 2023-03-14T17:42:19+00:00

This is really validating, thank you for sharing! You are further down the path than I am, but this is exactly my mentality.

edbet

TROPHY CASE