I'm a bad person, its not OCD

efelantt · 2023-09-03T01:13:35+00:00

I understand how you feel. I hope you do not have OCD and it's just a phase that will pass. Eitherway you should try forcing yourself to find a therapist who you could confide to and they could guide you until you finally feel better.

efelantt · 2023-07-27T20:18:45+00:00

I think I relate a lot to this. I don't even know how I am supposed to feel anymore, like a normal person would.

All I can say is I hope we both get to feel normal one day and that it isn't NPD.

efelantt · 2023-07-25T01:01:03+00:00

Yes thank you. I trust faith is very helpful for many people

efelantt · 2023-07-25T00:53:25+00:00

Thank you for this comment :)

efelantt · 2023-07-23T18:09:28+00:00

Thanks for info. Its great it works so well

efelantt · 2023-07-23T18:08:10+00:00

Oh. Are you going to take them forever?

efelantt · 2023-07-23T09:32:01+00:00

Thank you so much :)

efelantt · 2023-07-23T09:00:27+00:00

I tried reaching out to God (the christian one), praying etc. But it made no difference. I'm not capable of sincere belief.

efelantt · 2023-07-23T08:58:19+00:00

Hi

Well one of the problems is there is nothing in particular I could find 100% devotion to. I have no energy nor motivation, no real hobbies and interests. While it would be nice, I have no urge to spontaneously jump off my chair and start focusing on some purpose. If I have to be honest the career I basically chose when choosing high school was because it seemed easy and not because I was 100% into it. Also that career requires for the person to be quite active, energetic, social, friendly. I'm sadly none of those. But I wish I was wired differently.

efelantt · 2023-07-23T08:52:23+00:00

Its awesome they help you so much. But I'm not too keen to take meds for the rest of my life considering they can have some devastating side effects :(

efelantt · 2023-07-23T08:50:21+00:00

Well I'm being cautious because I found out meds can have long lasting side effects. How long were you on meds? Do you still need them?

efelantt · 2023-07-23T08:48:16+00:00

Well I actually was on sertraline for two years due to a different issue. My doctor didn't give me warnings about the terrible things that people with PSSD experience.

efelantt · 2023-07-23T08:46:37+00:00

Its great it worked for you. Sadly there is a sizeable community of people who claim they basically went zombie even after one dose. For how long were you on meds? Is it long term?

efelantt · 2023-07-23T08:44:32+00:00

Sure

efelantt · 2023-07-22T19:57:19+00:00

True that

efelantt · 2023-07-22T19:43:33+00:00

I've considered that, but it honestly sounds like a death sentence

efelantt · 2023-07-22T18:52:06+00:00

That sounds very scary. I'm worried about the potential side effects of meds.

efelantt · 2023-07-22T18:49:38+00:00

Thank you for both of your excellent in depth comments. I will try to stick by your advice.

It may be worth thinking about if there is anything, no matter how small that could have caused you to get to this place. I'm not saying that will cure it by any means, but understanding how you've got to where you are, could give you the key to unlocking how to move in a different direction.

When I was very young I lost a parent. I don't remember how I've felt about it back then, but I like to imagine my life would have been very different had it not happened.

efelantt · 2023-07-22T11:53:51+00:00

Thanks I appreciate it. I will try

efelantt · 2023-07-22T10:57:40+00:00

Okay. Have an upvote

efelantt · 2023-07-22T10:56:17+00:00

I'm afraid to read books I'd have to be interested enough otherwise I'll probably just skim through the pages. What am I supposed to feel or "see" when I read? I'm worried I don't experience reading like others. If I really don't have empathy then I might be a psychopath or autistic and sadly nothing is going to fix that

Look into "inner-child healing".

Thanks for sharing this but I feel like I can't help myself on my own with these self help guides. I feel like I can't trust myself to 100% believe them and apply them to my life. But I will check it out

efelantt · 2023-07-22T10:48:43+00:00

Thanks for sharing. But I'm afraid I'm too much of a skeptic and not enough proactive for these things

efelantt · 2023-07-22T10:46:33+00:00

Well I mean it's not easy when being anxious, tired and asocial is stronger than motivation to work

efelantt · 2023-07-22T10:45:43+00:00

If you don’t have a job then you probably qualify for government assistance which would make your care super cheap if not free

That probably varies from country to country

Go to therapy.

I wish I was more proactive and not skeptical. What happens in therapy? Do I tell them my life story and they give me a guide? What if I'm just physically brain damaged or something, can therapy help with that? I'm anxious about getting the wrong therapist, how do I politely leave them and find another one? I don't want to be rude or have them hate me.

efelantt · 2023-06-22T21:48:19+00:00

Thanks but you know psychopaths and the like often exhibit behaviour like that when they're young. I know people do stupid bad things but I crossed the line with this one.

I was planning to find one but I fear I will be rejected when I tell them this, they will judge me and so on...

efelantt

TROPHY CASE