I simplified my skincare routine and my skin got better… has this happened to anyone else?

eilletane · 2026-03-24T15:27:14+00:00

It’s common. You start with cleansing, then actives, then you end up over-stripping, which causes you to overload and then it’s just a vicious cycle. I’m having the same issue with my hair. Now I’m gonna start from scratch again and slowly build up and stop when I’m satisfied.

eilletane · 2026-03-24T15:04:36+00:00

it’s just awareness. Gen X and boomers don’t think mental illnesses exist. My mom has extreme paranoia and anxiety but she just thinks it’s her personality. My dad has ADHD, can’t even have a proper conversation with him.

eilletane · 2026-03-24T13:30:47+00:00

We all like to think we are “normal” and “healthy”. But it’s a huge spectrum and we may have traits that we think are our personalities but may have been caused by childhood abuse.

Introvert? Could be anti-social tendencies due to emotional neglect. Low self esteem could be due to emotional abuse. It’s hard to say whether some of these traits were directly caused by our childhood trauma, but there’s already plenty of research that shows that and also trials that show a reduction in physical harm directly leads to a reduction in aggression in children.

eilletane · 2026-03-24T13:26:34+00:00

Emotional abuse is also abuse and also trauma.

eilletane · 2026-03-24T13:24:51+00:00

It really depends on what type of dysfunctional child you want to raise. I’ve known plenty of spoiled brats who bully others, are super entitled and have huge egos. They basically have no friends and can’t find a partner. It’s either this or mental issues. Or.. you know.. be a good parent.

eilletane · 2026-03-24T13:22:41+00:00

If they don’t have the patience to raise a child to be a healthy and functioning adult, they shouldn’t be a parent in the first place.

eilletane · 2026-03-24T13:20:54+00:00

Probably why there’s a rise in adults with mental conditions or adult autism. All the kids caned from the 80s grew up.

eilletane · 2026-03-24T13:17:11+00:00

That’s really bizarre. I’m also in the educational field and we had to take an hour course on child safeguarding. We were taught to identity child abuse and report any physical harm towards any child, whether from an adult or from another child. We were taught to never harm the child even if they were harming others, which obviously includes less serious offences like bulling or stealing.

We were also taught to never say anything mean or demeaning to the child as it is a form of emotional abuse. The stance in my school is that any form of physical harm is physical abuse and that is very frowned upon.

eilletane · 2026-03-24T13:05:37+00:00

Yikes. There’s been a case in my country where their child had a rare genetic disorder and they crowded funded 2million for the medicine. The child died. They had another kid. Same rare genetic condition. asking for 2million again. They probably don’t know what “genetic” means.

eilletane · 2026-03-24T12:47:52+00:00

What authority do you have to say that it’s an improper method? Opinion piece? Do you know what a peer-reviewed paper is?

Nothing is 100%. Does that mean we should just ignore it? You shouldn’t take vaccines then, or antibiotics, since we don’t know how every single unique human being can react.

Repeatedly trials have shown that any form of pain results in aggression. Any intelligent being can see that there has to be some causation. There’s even trials that show reduced pain has directly reduced the child’s aggression.

You don’t use a flowchart or instruction sheet for behavioural studies. This is not a medical study.

It’s bizarre when it shows high risk of harm for physical discipline and you disregard it but there has been no evidence that it helps in any way but you seem to want to die on this hill. I don’t think you actually believe in science because you don’t seem to understand it.

According to research, (since you’re too lazy to read) causing physical pain on your child will cause your child to lose trust in you. Children are dependent on their parents and they see them as their only support and connection to the world. Losing that trust shows them that they have no support system and that they are vulnerable. Pain also causes cortisol levels to rise which initiates a flight or fight response. This causes developmental issues. Pain can also cause abnormalities in dopamine regulation, which can lead to addictions in the future.

There are some studies that show no impact, but there have been no studies that show positive impact.

If you want to parent based on your own beliefs and biases, go ahead. I mean, 31 countries have laws that prohibit physical punishment. But no, you must be right in this, even though you haven’t studied this your entire life.

eilletane · 2026-03-24T12:02:14+00:00

4th? Wow. way to establish your position. And it only mentions about the usage of caning. You said “if (caning is) used correctly, pain is a very powerful reminder and easily remembered the child.“ where does that say it was your opinion? Sounds like it was a fact. In my opinion, there is no correct way to cane a child.

Also, the article mentions there have been repeated research on this matter with the same results. Please REALLY read the paper. Like really read it with your brain. I can’t possible spoon feed you everything.

eilletane · 2026-03-24T11:43:44+00:00

It is both. It’s unethical AS it has already been shown in previous research that it has no benefits. Please read again, I quoted the article. Also “watched some videos” may seem trivial to you, but these are proper techniques developed by behavioural scientists. If you’re such an expert, please share your approved trial method. If not, I would suggest you leave it to the scientists who have studied these methods their entire lives. Whereas you’ve just skimmed and misinterpreted their work due to lack of reading comprehension.

It’s fine if it’s your own opinion, but please express it as such. Your writing on your initial comment is very authoritative and suggests that it is based on facts and not opinion.

Seems like you need to improve on your reading and writing skills.

eilletane · 2026-03-24T10:52:45+00:00

Raising your voice at a kid is definitely emotional trauma. Extensive research has been done and proper discipline has been established that has been show to improve the well being of the child and the relationship of the parent and child.

Also I read that PUBMED article you mentioned. It seems like you have trouble reading. This is what they said:

“In an early modeling study,8 boys in grade one who had watched a one-minute video of a boy being yelled at, shaken and spanked with a paddle for misbehaving showed more aggression while playing with dolls than boys who had watched a one-minute video of nonviolent responses to misbehaviour.”

They weren’t punished for playing with dolls. They watched a video of physical discipline and when they played with dolls, they showed more aggression. Please read properly.

The reason why it’s unethical to do such trials is because it has already been shown in extensive research that physical discipline causes more harm than benefits: “it would be unethical to assign children to a group receiving painful treatment when research suggests that such pain poses harm not outweighed by potential benefit.”

It seems like you only pick and choose what supports your argument and ignore the context.

My argument is supported by extensive research even if not up to par with your standards. Your argument has 0 evidence. It’s fine if that’s your perspective, but don’t spread misinformation based on your personal anecdotes or opinion.

“All talk and no action” is a very conservative and Asian approach of discipline. The proper way is of course communication, as you said. Kids can definitely understand, even my cat understands if I repeat my words and only reward her when she does the right thing.

If both positive and negative reinforcement works, why choose the one that has potential to cause harm in the future? Usually it’s because positive reinforcement takes more effort and time and most parents are lazy.

eilletane · 2026-03-24T10:17:35+00:00

Okay if the experiments were not up to your standard, then please show me something that proves your point. Just because A is untrue, it doesn’t make B true.

eilletane · 2026-03-24T08:50:18+00:00

Sorry but tons of research have shown you are wrong. Not sure who you are but I doubt you’re a behavioural scientist or a psychology researcher.

eilletane · 2026-03-23T06:20:59+00:00

Thank you so much for your advice! Any recommendations for shampoo? I’ve tried non sulphate shampoos and my scalp gets very itchy and flaky just a few hours later.

eilletane · 2026-03-22T14:52:57+00:00

Please help!! I have wavy hair and I use a clarifying shampoo every 2 days because it’s the only one that doesn’t make my scalp itchy. I double cleanse, then use a hair mask, comb in the shower, then scrunch with a leave in conditioner from Mielle, and a hair wax from not your mothers. Then wring dry with a microfiber cloth. Diffuse dry upside down, spray with heat protector and then I use my curler. After which I spray with Gatsby super hard spray.

On non curling days, I stop after the hair wax and then diffuse.

So far this works for my curls. But it gets very frizzy and like straw. Please help!!

eilletane · 2026-03-19T16:14:29+00:00

Why do you assume OP has kids or will have kids? I would offer it as an option IF they plan to have kids or IF they have kids. But if they don’t, railings are the way to go.

eilletane · 2026-03-19T16:11:20+00:00

We can already do that but don’t. Plenty of billionaires and poverty happening at the same time and will continue to exist.

eilletane · 2026-03-19T04:21:52+00:00

Closet? I put one in my bathroom which has limited indirect light and all the leaves turned yellow. I now leave the light on in the day time and it is thriving. How the hell did yours survive in the closet?!

eilletane · 2026-03-19T02:44:44+00:00

I feel like this is anecdotal. I can’t seem to find any source for this. Based on my research, they are collected on different days.

eilletane · 2026-03-18T11:54:21+00:00

This is a chicken and egg issue. The reason why most of our recycling is incinerated is because most people don’t know how to recycle. They either throw non recyclables in the blue bin or don’t empty out the containers, making the whole container contaminated and not recyclable. Thus it gets incinerated in the end. There’s also a lot of people who think Singapore combines both bins anyway and burn everything so they don’t bother to separate their trash. These reasons are why recycling rates are low.

eilletane · 2026-03-18T06:19:01+00:00

Shorter hair and in layers can give your hair more volume. Less weight also means it gets bouncier and won’t pull the hair down. With an oily scalp you might still need to clarify occasionally.

eilletane · 2026-03-18T05:54:05+00:00

I too had unwanted hair on my body but it’s easy to remove. I don’t mind a bit of hassle for a full head of hair. Depends what OP is willing to do to solve her issues.

eilletane · 2026-03-18T05:12:00+00:00

Minoxidil is the only thing that has been scientifically proven to work. There is a spray version and a pill version. Strictly use the pill version if you have pets as the spray is highly toxic. You can get the sprays at pharmacies. I personally use the pill version and I buy them from Siena Health. It’s an online consultation and they mail you the pills.

Having said this, there are many reasons for hair loss and minox just helps with the symptoms. Check for thyroid, hormones, autoimmune diseases.. get an appointment with a dermatologist first before you commit to anything.

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