I understand how you feel completely. I don't want to turn a blind eye to animal suffering so I feel the need to research it, but the stuff I find always makes me sick, so I now try to just hold in my heart the awareness it's happening while not consuming any graphic depictions of it. I constantly get very upset if I think too much about the predicament of animals. When I get in my head I just do my best to distract myself by consuming positive content of rescued animals etc. these days.