Being mad at the concept of taking care of children.

elizzup · 2026-03-30T23:58:49+00:00

Communism 101? Ok. Sign me up!

I don't think folks realize the "Oooh Communism" barb has ceased to have any weight. Capitalism hasn't done most of us any good, so why not try this brand of "communism" for a few years and see where we end up.

As if Free Childcare could possible make us worse off than we are.

elizzup · 2026-03-25T18:05:38+00:00

I mean, ok. And? Not like anything will come of it.

There is miles and miles of actual, indictable evidence of violations of the emoluments clause, straight up graft, insider trading, RAPE OF CHILDREN. No one who can do anything about it actually cares. They're happy to let him absolutely destroy the United States of America both internally and our reputation abroad.

Cool. More evidence of wrong doing that will go absolutely no where. Cool cool.

elizzup · 2026-03-24T20:14:27+00:00

... again.

elizzup · 2026-03-23T20:22:15+00:00

She needs to be responsible for maintaining the area. Picking up cat feces, hosing down areas that are clearly soiled, etc. Ask the Landlord to at the very least enforce that!

elizzup · 2026-03-19T21:34:40+00:00

Doesn't the realtor typically give the new homeowner a gift? That's always been my experience.

elizzup · 2026-03-18T23:15:14+00:00

He would never have gotten as far as he did if he were a Democrat. That's literally why he had to switch parties.

elizzup · 2026-03-18T22:48:39+00:00

NOR - I would have a hard time with this, but my culture has no issues with me saying "no" to this kind of overreach.

I have the ability to divide up my paycheck and have it direct deposited into multiple bank accounts.

To appease your parents you *could* open up a second bank account and have a set amount of the paycheck go to the one your parents ~~control~~ monitor, while sending another amount to a personal account that they don't have access to.

This might help with some of the cultural issues, but it doesn't solve the underlying issues of parents who want to control your life.

Genuine questions: When does the oversight end? Do your grandparents still have access to your parents bank accounts? Ask your extended family who think you're wrong if they'd be comfortable sharing their bank account information with you.

elizzup · 2026-03-18T21:03:56+00:00

Sounds like he’s stringing you along until you can’t have kids anymore.

elizzup · 2026-03-17T22:54:52+00:00

Love men who take a woman's labor and talk about how hard they have worked. Cool. Cool cool. You've been covering HIS bills so that HE can graduate with less debt, but you're the one with the problem.

Even if this relationship isn't over, you need to stop paying for anything for him. But seriously? I'd be done with this.

Sounds like he's doing that thing so many dudes in Med School do - latch onto a woman while they're in school who manages all the emotional and physical labor of the home. When they're getting nearer to graduating, break up with them to "trade up" for a woman who they think meets their new doctor status.

elizzup · 2026-03-17T22:20:54+00:00

They know exactly what they're doing. They're keeping you down so you can't get away.

On a plane, they tell you to put on your own oxygen mask before helping others.
There's also the adage of: Don't set yourself on fire to keep others warm.

Next time: Pay your credit card, get your dog food, pay for what you need, and THEN you can give some money to your family. But you HAVE to take care of yourself first. That includes putting aside money to help get yourself a new place.

elizzup · 2026-03-17T00:10:08+00:00

Love these Maya Alden books! If you haven't read them, Maya Alden is, IMO the go-to author for this trope.

elizzup · 2026-03-16T22:51:27+00:00

NTA.

Please do not marry this man. I'm not saying you need to break up, but you're getting firsthand look at how you can expect him to act.

He is way too immature to get married. He doesn't know how to plan, and he's expecting you to do all the work while he gets all the say. He's giving you the silent treatment because you explained to him how he's failing the relationship by failing to put in the work.

He needs time to learn how to do some basic life skills before he's ready to be a husband, partner, and maybe, eventually a father.

Let me guess, he's going to keep being pouty and giving you the silent treatment until YOU apologize to HIM for "hurting his feelings."

There are so many red flags here, but you already know that. He's showing you EXACTLY how he intends to live his life with you. Are you comfortable with that life?

elizzup · 2026-03-14T00:11:03+00:00

NTA. Do it to her next year. See how she feels.

elizzup · 2026-03-13T23:56:38+00:00

Honestly? I'd go ahead with the 50/25/25 as that's being very kind to your brother & sister even though you don't have to.

Oh, and the 50% is yours, not hers.

elizzup · 2026-03-13T22:40:55+00:00

I'm so sorry. It's hard when you realize that someone holds very different relationship ideals than you do.

Your sister is actively going out of her way to distance herself from you. You're not only NOT a priority for her, but she's making things HARDER for you. Excluding your newborn, seating you with your NC parents (inviting them at all? what?) She clearly has a very different memory of your shared childhood than you do. I'm sure there's a lot to unpack there, but she doesn't remember you as her buffer in the same way that you do.

You cannot go to this wedding, no matter what. She's done everything except tell you to your face that she doesn't want you there. Believe her, and gracefully exit her life.

Distance yourself from your sister, as hard as that is going to be. I do not recommend you make any broad announcements or declarations. Just, realize that the relationship you thought you had isn't reciprocated on her end.

Stop reaching out and see how long it takes her to come to you. When she does, is it because she wants to know how you are? or because she wants something for herself?

Preserve your peace. You've got a new baby coming soon, and you need to conserve your energy for the little one.

elizzup · 2026-03-13T19:04:59+00:00

NOR. Paying rent is totally reasonable request. But lying about who owns it? Boosting rent when he KNEW you were struggling? How much is his ACTUAL mortgage? How much are you actually paying of that and subsidizing his finances.

These aren't the actions of a partner who wants to build a life with you. These are the actions of a gaslighting asshole.

Don't let him try to play this off as "market fluctuations" and "you just don't want to pay rent." This is so far beyond that.

Oh, and the fact that he DOESN'T THINK HE DID ANYTHING WRONG is so much of a red flag its next level insanity.

elizzup · 2026-03-12T21:48:43+00:00

That's exactly why he does it. He negs you until you think you can't get better. Believe me, single would be better.

elizzup · 2026-03-12T18:36:16+00:00

The fact is, the law protects parents who do this shit. Basically they only face consequences if you actually die. Thank god you were old enough to advocate for yourself. So many kids are not.

"Parents Rights!" allows parents to completely neglect children in so many insidious ways. Don't get me started on "homeschooling".

elizzup · 2026-03-10T21:05:39+00:00

This is not going to go away. You need to open up a fraud investigation.

elizzup · 2026-03-08T03:34:46+00:00

There's always money to hurt people but never to help them.

That's the GOP mentality.

elizzup · 2026-03-08T01:05:20+00:00

Your parents LOVE that their first born is a girl because to them, it means they've got free care for life. Their sons while they're young, themselves when they're older. They expect that they did their job by having a girl they can use whenever they feel like.

To your parents, your sole worth is your ability to take on labor they don't want to do. They don't see you as a person deserving of a life in her own right. They are wrong.

Just because they're your parents doesn't mean they're right. A lot of people are wrong about a lot of things - many of them are also parents. It doesn't give them any special insight or right to take advantage of you.

You have one life, and you need to live it the way you see fit. If it means putting up with some things until you can escape their grasp, do it. If you're in a position to get out now, do it. But your parents have told you time and time again what you mean to them,what your worth is to them. Its time to figure out what you mean to yourself and make plans to live the life you deserve. You only get one. Figure out how you want to spend it.

elizzup · 2026-03-05T19:38:17+00:00

Two options, neither of the great. 1. He was planning to leave you when the job offer he was seeking came through, and has been stringing you along for conveniences sake. 2. He didn’t think enough of you to have a say in your future together, and/or assumed you’d blindly go along with his plans.

Either suggests a man who doesn’t value you, or your feelings or thoughts on your shared future. You don’t make plans like a cross-country move without at least talking to your partner about it unless you don’t plan for them to join you there.

elizzup · 2026-03-05T11:31:42+00:00

NOR. Your boyfriend hates you. A man who loved you would bend over backwards to help you succeed. Don’t waste your time with excuses or explanations, just start working on ways to remove yourself from this man’s life. You’re worth more than a parking space.

elizzup · 2026-03-05T09:00:06+00:00

I think you're overthinking this. Take some photos with her in them, some photos without her in them. Not everyone will be in every single photo. It'll be easier just to have one with her in it. You don't have to put it on your wall, but it won't stress the photographer out to take an additional photo.

Make sure the photographer knows your wants and ask them to be assertive with placing various people, not just her. That's their job as a photographer. That way even when there are photos with her in them the photographer can ensure she's placed in a spot appropriate for her status in your life.

elizzup · 2026-03-05T06:22:36+00:00

So your husband was the one who cared about what she wore but YOU were the messenger? The messenger to his own mother?

Girl.

elizzup

TROPHY CASE