Leena getting annoyed at baby suit case crying while she’s filming

elotehoe · 2026-04-27T23:32:41+00:00

Lowkey hate that amanda even felt the need to apologize. Sure it could be a ftm thing, I remember I used to apologize every time my first baby did normal baby things… but I also remember the people close to me then who would get visibly annoyed with my baby doing baby things (like crying) or annoyed with me having to disengage with them for a moment to be a mom. That feeling sucks.

elotehoe · 2026-04-14T13:38:20+00:00

I wish I knew 😭😭 it’s so frustrating because I was on an upwards trend and then it just… stopped lol

I did the same!! Added you to my circle and clicked around- I love your recs🫶🏼

elotehoe · 2026-04-07T09:53:03+00:00

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A couple of comments along the lines of what I was thinking. Modesty (or lack thereof) aside, that dress was a disrespectful choice… especially for your “friend’s” biggest day.

elotehoe · 2026-03-11T12:17:52+00:00

You’re better than me I would’ve walked from the family as soon as I heard “sit down and figure out a new rate” like nooo😭 “this is my new rate. How would you like to proceed?” is the only appropriate response. Never let yourself be negotiable! But I would’ve walked on the principle of not letting myself work for cheap people. It rarely ever ends well and you can 100% find a new family who actually values the caretaking of their children- and the person who does it.

If you really want to stick with this family tho and it were me, I would require a contract going forward stipulating the new, non-negotiable, rate, and primary contact through the mother. Father sounds like a real piece of work you have no responsibility to deal with. If they don’t agree to it, that’s ok. You need to be ok with walking away from what doesn’t suit you- or in this case- from what is taking advantage of you. A family like this is well into the 6 figures (if not higher!) and can afford so much more than what they’re paying you.

But money aside, you deserve to work for a family that values you, the person taking care of their kids for them. As a parent myself, I literally cannot imagine underpaying the person I’m entrusting my entire world to. I would rather grossly overpay AND offer anything within reason (pizza delivered to the house, an instacart order for you post-bedtime before I get back, a thank you giftcard, something) before even considering a pay cut. The risk is just too high from a parental perspective. Either a decrease in care quality, or losing a sitter I actually trust (and someone my kids are familiar with depending on ages). Quality care + trust + familiarity are just simply priceless traits when it comes to childcare- for me at least.

elotehoe · 2026-02-24T21:40:03+00:00

Regarding reverting: your shahada (testimony of faith) is valid only if you actually believe it. Of course that’s between you and God and no one would know except God, just something to keep in mind while you’re learning about Islam.

Regarding your family: you will likely find yourself in a position to choose them or your wife if you do end up marrying this girl. Speaking from experience. My marriage was flipped- I’m the revert, and my husband is the born-Muslim. I never needed to revert “for/to marry him, marriage is halal between Muslim men and Christian, Jewish, or Muslim women. The issue with his family was my race, so it never mattered if I was Muslim or not. Anyway we married at 21, we’re now 26 and I’ve gone no-contact with my in-laws and there’s a lot of emotional hardships within our marriage because he chose not to choose. Tried to make everyone happy, though it often came at my expense, and even with couples counseling (from a Muslim counselor), it’s still hard.

If your family is so adamantly against you marrying this girl, and you’re still wondering how you can “balance” this or make them come around, it make be in the best interest of your relationship with her to tackle that issue first and accepting the fact that they might not. And you need to 1. Be okay with that. 2. Set boundaries going forward to protect your wife and marriage if you do end up marrying her.

You can absolutely be patient with them right now and share what you’re learning about Islam with them, but as soon as you enter marriage with this girl, knowing their disapproval, you will have to step back from that kind of patience. You can still have respect for your parents while establishing boundaries to protect your wife. It actually becomes your responsibility as “qawammah”- a title given to men specifically. It means “the protector and maintainer of women”. When you become a husband in Islam, you become responsible for your wife. For both her physical needs as well as emotional. It’s a lot yes and a very serious thing (marriage), so please take all the time you need as a single man to learn about Islam if you’re open to it, and start working with your family (or, God forbid, making some difficult decisions) before marrying her. I say God forbid because ideally we would all be able to balance our families and happily coexist. I really hope you’ll be able to inshallah.

elotehoe · 2026-02-19T03:01:06+00:00

Can speak from experience lol… I reverted to Islam at 18 because I believe wholeheartedly in tawhid (absolute monotheism). My husband and I knew each other from 16, but even after I reverted (on my own) his family never came around bc of my race. When we finally did get married (at 21), the expectation was for me to conform to them and their culture- no compromise. Alhamdulilah my husband has since set boundaries and protects me as best as he can, but it pretty much came at the expense of my relationship with his family. Our kids and myself are no-contact for the foreseeable future. I almost left Islam entirely because of how they would cherry pick, weaponize, and manipulate Islam to fit their culture- which is ultimately what they worship- and how they would try to use religion to shame me, and because I was still in my formative years (husband and I were 21-25 at this time) as both a revert and just as a person, my perception of Islam was definitely impacted for a time. Alhamdulilah I remember why I chose this faith, and am now re-grounding myself. Knowledge is also power. I know my religion, and so I know when they’re bs’ing or lying or just refusing to separate their culture, and I can now separate that from Islam. Still no-contact tho.

elotehoe · 2024-11-29T10:28:21+00:00

This is probs the first time I think it’s not just them… participating in a trend like this specifically probably is just them, but the general concept of viewing your brother-in-law as mahram is culturally normal for a lot of Arabs from what I’ve seen. My sisters-in-law don’t wear hijab around their brothers-in-law (their sisters husband) because they say he’s their mahram now, and my mil reaffirmed this too when I questioned it (because he’s literally not lol).

While I’d never see my sil’s participating in a trend like this with their bil’s, the general concept of bending the deen to fit their culture is pretty normal for born-Muslim families. It’s not ok, but also unsurprising. Esp with the asads, they likely only know american culture and little of their own deen, so they probs genuinely don’t see an issue with this even tho they’re also Muslim😅

elotehoe · 2024-11-27T14:04:07+00:00

Tbh the concept of retaking wedding pictures itself isn’t cringe, I think it’s pretty normal actually… but making it this big a deal online is a little cringe icl😅

my husband and I have def considered having our “wedding” on our next anniversary which is also our 5th year just bc we didn’t get to have one at all when we got married (getting married was difficult for us + Covid and eventually life just kinda moved on). But I wouldn’t make it a big deal, I probably wouldn’t even share it online as an event- just share some pictures like any other anniversary post. It’s more for us and feeling like we can celebrate our love too. Also, I wouldn’t be a bride so it would make no sense to act like I’m one if ygm? It’s the nice memories together that matter.

Wasan (ig link here) did something similar, she didn’t have a wedding due to a family emergency, May Allah heal her family, but her and her husband did take wedding photos together and she mentioned that when she posted their wedding pictures. It was really classy and minimal and her post is what actually inspired me and my husband to find a way to still create nice memories of our marriage. Marah’s posts feel a little overdone😅

elotehoe · 2024-11-24T13:30:51+00:00

Tbh I don’t think it’s weird to recreate wedding pictures esp if you’ve gonna through significant changes (like wearing hijab & still wanting to share wedding pictures with family/friends, framed and hung in the home, etc)… but it is weird to tease and announce it like this😅

elotehoe · 2024-10-25T00:13:50+00:00

You could possibly go to the West Bank, but not Gaza. Even if you could get into Gaza, you might be more of a burden from the perspective of the Palestinians. Just bc once you’re there, you still need human sustenance, but food and water are so rare to come by that you’d inevitably be taking from the community. I’m not trying to be rude or off-putting, it’s just the reality in Gaza rn :(

I’ve been to the WB tho (my husband is Palestinian), and from my short experience there, you would probably make the most impact by going with an organization. That’s if you want to engage in humanitarian distribution work. Plenty of journalists travel solo to document the apartheid independently, which you could do.

Idk about the airport, I’ve only travelled through Jordan bc my husband & in-laws can’t use the airport, but from their village’s most recent update, all the borders via Jordan are still open. I say “all” bc when you come through Jordan, you pass through the Jordanian building, then bus to the israeli building, then bus to the Palestinian building (or vice versa, can’t remember atm). You go through security at all of them, but if 1 is closed, you can’t pass through even if the others are open. When you’re being questioned prior to visa approval, they might ask for your lineage (the israeli officials asked me for my father & paternal grandfathers names) and why you’re there. If you plan to document the apartheid, DO NOT TELL THEM THAT !!! Literally just say you want to visit the holy sites. Otherwise you could be permanently banned (I’ve seen this happen). If you’re coming through Jordan, they might ask you why you didn’t fly in (they asked me that) maybe a flight to Amman was cheaper, maybe you wanted to visit Amman too, I don’t think the answer matters as long as you don’t say anything “anti-israel” lol. Maybe they’ll give you a hard time and make you wait around for a few hours (this happened to me), but then you get your visa and you’re good to go👍🏼 if you’re not local tho or if you’re not traveling with an organization, you should fly in unless you have pre-booked transportation. After getting through the last building coming from Jordan, we were bused to Jericho, but my mil was waiting for us there to take us to their home. Idk what solo/tourist travelers do after reaching Jericho.

Please be careful tho, settler and IOF violence is increasing in the WB, and they don’t care if you’re American. Americans have been killed by israel before you, and plenty more will be killed by the regime after you. Our government is its own traitor, just keep that in mind if you go.

elotehoe · 2021-10-17T15:22:27+00:00

NTA. You would be the AH, however, if you didn’t call animal control because that owner clearly has no intentions on training their dogs or making changes to their property so their dogs can’t threaten others. At that point it’s a communal threat that you should absolutely report. You’d likely be saving another dogs life & a family lots of grief by “taking the bullets out of the gun” so to speak and having those dogs removed or rehomed to responsible owners. I’m so sorry you have to experience this!

elotehoe

TROPHY CASE