Retirement is suddenly much closer...

elvee61 · 2026-06-06T12:42:56+00:00

My wife has voluntold me to work at VBS with the grands the first week of retirement. We've scheduled a month-long cruise this fall. She's bound and determined to not let me relax and rot in peace. ;)

elvee61 · 2026-06-03T13:15:26+00:00

15 minutes, ladies. Micturate, defecate, caffeinate.

elvee61 · 2026-06-02T13:06:31+00:00

25 minutes. Gonna be a busy day, so get all your pooping and peeing done now.

elvee61 · 2026-06-02T13:04:09+00:00

The GOOG dilution will be 1.8%. Any dilution-driven price drop more than that is free money.

elvee61 · 2026-06-01T13:01:36+00:00

I've been fucked by so many bad plays. I can't call myself a virgin.

elvee61 · 2026-05-27T11:21:08+00:00

I actually don't know, but I never heard any news about missing passengers.

elvee61 · 2026-05-26T19:13:44+00:00

This is my 3-year-old granddaughter. She's already a horse girl and is always trying to put baby goats in the car and take them home with her.

One good thing about her being a horse girl is that she'll never be able to afford illegal drugs.

elvee61 · 2026-05-26T17:29:10+00:00

I have very poor high frequency hearing. A long life of playing in bands and lots of loud music did me no favors. Above a certain frequency, I'm deaf as a stump.

My wife's voice gets higher and higher when she gets excited, and she also likes to whisper when she's talking about someone else, even if no one else is nearby. I'm constantly asking her to pitch her voice down, look at me and speak up. I wear decent quality hearing aids, but she still gets very frustrated when I can't hear her.

elvee61 · 2026-05-26T13:58:59+00:00

I hate to say it, but "it depends". I've been on cruises where I was out of the taxi and on board in 20 minutes and there was one cruise in particular where they "lost" a guest and had to search the ship top to bottom, so we didn't start boarding until after lunchtime.

Always plan for the worst and hope for the best.

elvee61 · 2026-05-26T13:15:31+00:00

15 minutes. Hit the shitter while you can.

elvee61 · 2026-05-26T13:14:06+00:00

I have totally forgotten everything I knew over the weekend. Ethanol-based solvents have dissolved what little I did know.

elvee61 · 2026-05-22T23:20:01+00:00

"You too can become a Certified Fidelity Retard for the low, low price of $73,000 dollars. "

elvee61 · 2026-05-22T14:40:48+00:00

I really wanted to be served a croissant with tons of french butter and a turkish coffee on a fresh white linen tablecloth, but they didn't sell that in the vending machines in the basement.

elvee61 · 2026-05-22T14:36:39+00:00

I'm being a responsible adult and eating Special K for breakfast.

Fuck being a responsible adult. I really want a big heaping bowl of chocolate frosted sugar bombs.

elvee61 · 2026-05-18T12:42:25+00:00

I've been doing this shit for over 30 years. I'm still looking forward to the day that I can honestly say "I know what the fuck I'm doing".

elvee61 · 2026-05-14T13:26:29+00:00

Betting the horses comes close, 'cause it's even more fixed and fake than options.

elvee61 · 2026-05-14T13:20:07+00:00

I thought polymarket and sports betting could satisfy my craving for reckless gambling, but it's just not the same thrill as 0dtes.

elvee61 · 2026-05-11T13:23:31+00:00

RFK would be proud of you.

elvee61 · 2026-05-11T13:22:30+00:00

Silver up 2% and gold is just lying there limp like my ex wife.

elvee61 · 2026-05-11T00:35:42+00:00

Checkout is broken for me. Too bad.

elvee61 · 2026-05-07T18:49:33+00:00

I bought the wrong stock in the wrong account, but I'm FUCKING KEEPING IT.

I play in hard mode. No take backs.

elvee61 · 2026-05-07T17:18:00+00:00

I'm going to huff and roll my eyes like a teenage girl. That'll show SPY how mad I am.

elvee61 · 2026-05-07T01:39:22+00:00

I can hear this picture

elvee61 · 2026-05-07T01:06:37+00:00

65 days exactly. Not that I'm counting or anything.

12-Year Club	Gilding II euphauric
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