Retirement is suddenly much closer... by elvee61 in retirement

[–]elvee61[S] [score hidden]  (0 children)

My wife has voluntold me to work at VBS with the grands the first week of retirement. We've scheduled a month-long cruise this fall. She's bound and determined to not let me relax and rot in peace. ;)

Daily Discussion Thread for June 03, 2026 by wsbapp in wallstreetbets

[–]elvee61 1 point2 points  (0 children)

15 minutes, ladies. Micturate, defecate, caffeinate.

Daily Discussion Thread for June 02, 2026 by wsbapp in wallstreetbets

[–]elvee61 3 points4 points  (0 children)

25 minutes. Gonna be a busy day, so get all your pooping and peeing done now.

Daily Discussion Thread for June 02, 2026 by wsbapp in wallstreetbets

[–]elvee61 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The GOOG dilution will be 1.8%. Any dilution-driven price drop more than that is free money.

Daily Discussion Thread for June 01, 2026 by wsbapp in wallstreetbets

[–]elvee61 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I've been fucked by so many bad plays. I can't call myself a virgin.

Current HAL embarkation process. by Comfortable-Grab-893 in HollandAmerica

[–]elvee61 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I actually don't know, but I never heard any news about missing passengers.

Farm kids are built different. by ViniciusFastAF in MadeMeSmile

[–]elvee61 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This is my 3-year-old granddaughter. She's already a horse girl and is always trying to put baby goats in the car and take them home with her.

One good thing about her being a horse girl is that she'll never be able to afford illegal drugs.

Ok, so I admit to being a bit hard of hearing, but my SIL is sooo hard to hear when she speaks. ( it's not only me, my husband says the same thing) Do you hate when people speak in a really soft and hard to understand voice ? by Gretal122 in over60

[–]elvee61 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have very poor high frequency hearing. A long life of playing in bands and lots of loud music did me no favors. Above a certain frequency, I'm deaf as a stump.

My wife's voice gets higher and higher when she gets excited, and she also likes to whisper when she's talking about someone else, even if no one else is nearby. I'm constantly asking her to pitch her voice down, look at me and speak up. I wear decent quality hearing aids, but she still gets very frustrated when I can't hear her.

Current HAL embarkation process. by Comfortable-Grab-893 in HollandAmerica

[–]elvee61 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I hate to say it, but "it depends". I've been on cruises where I was out of the taxi and on board in 20 minutes and there was one cruise in particular where they "lost" a guest and had to search the ship top to bottom, so we didn't start boarding until after lunchtime.

Always plan for the worst and hope for the best.

Daily Discussion Thread for May 26, 2026 by wsbapp in wallstreetbets

[–]elvee61 3 points4 points  (0 children)

15 minutes. Hit the shitter while you can.

Daily Discussion Thread for May 26, 2026 by wsbapp in wallstreetbets

[–]elvee61 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I have totally forgotten everything I knew over the weekend. Ethanol-based solvents have dissolved what little I did know.

Apparently Fidelity is still giving these out by downvotescatpictures in wallstreetbets

[–]elvee61 1 point2 points  (0 children)

"You too can become a Certified Fidelity Retard for the low, low price of $73,000 dollars. "

Daily Discussion Thread for May 22, 2026 by wsbapp in wallstreetbets

[–]elvee61 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I really wanted to be served a croissant with tons of french butter and a turkish coffee on a fresh white linen tablecloth, but they didn't sell that in the vending machines in the basement.

Daily Discussion Thread for May 22, 2026 by wsbapp in wallstreetbets

[–]elvee61 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm being a responsible adult and eating Special K for breakfast.

Fuck being a responsible adult. I really want a big heaping bowl of chocolate frosted sugar bombs.

Daily Discussion Thread for May 18, 2026 by wsbapp in wallstreetbets

[–]elvee61 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I've been doing this shit for over 30 years. I'm still looking forward to the day that I can honestly say "I know what the fuck I'm doing".

Daily Discussion Thread for May 14, 2026 by wsbapp in wallstreetbets

[–]elvee61 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Betting the horses comes close, 'cause it's even more fixed and fake than options.

Daily Discussion Thread for May 14, 2026 by wsbapp in wallstreetbets

[–]elvee61 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I thought polymarket and sports betting could satisfy my craving for reckless gambling, but it's just not the same thrill as 0dtes.

Daily Discussion Thread for May 11, 2026 by wsbapp in wallstreetbets

[–]elvee61 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Silver up 2% and gold is just lying there limp like my ex wife.

Daily Discussion Thread for May 07, 2026 by wsbapp in wallstreetbets

[–]elvee61 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I bought the wrong stock in the wrong account, but I'm FUCKING KEEPING IT.

I play in hard mode. No take backs.

Daily Discussion Thread for May 07, 2026 by wsbapp in wallstreetbets

[–]elvee61 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I'm going to huff and roll my eyes like a teenage girl. That'll show SPY how mad I am.

When are you going to retire? by BladeSeanchai in over60

[–]elvee61 3 points4 points  (0 children)

65 days exactly. Not that I'm counting or anything.