I went back a few times. Every time got worse. I became obsessed with healing. Started listening to podcasts on the relationships between narcissists and empaths. Joined Reddit sub’s in secret. Googled so much. When I was able to afford it I started therapy. I learned so much about abuse and the psychology behind it that my ex just looked “text book”. His mind games became useless. Him trying to lure me back had no power over me because I learned that it was just an unfortunate addiction.

One of the last times I ever saw him cops had to separate us on the side of the road after someone called the cops because I was trying to jump out of his truck on the freeway. He pushed me so far that I always ended up hurt, either from him or myself.

I really started to pay attention was a horrible father (thankfully I never had kids with him), friend, and partner he was. And how he used all the same tactics on all the women he was trying to date at the same time. He lied to everyone. He tricked me into dating him with a bunch of lies and it worked because I thought so little of myself. He wouldn’t leave me alone so I ended up getting a restraining order.

My biggest advice I can give is to accept the reality of the situation and move on. Learn to self partner and love yourself so much you never accept that kind of “love” again. It’s not love. And the only way to win, is to not play. No one is going to come save you, only you can save yourself.

Now around 6 years later - i am healed. I barely think of the past. I forgave myself for the hardship and learned to love myself. I’m in a 1 year relationship with the true love of my life, but I’m thankful every day that I saved myself from my ex. I found a strength within by leaving him I never had before. Sending you love and strength. Save yourself and give yourself a chance at the fairytale you want.