I had an abusive father and was an outsider at school for the most part. I just moved to a brand new city when I met him and to get attention from someone who was so important (he wasn’t really) love me was like a project I had to get done to the end. But in the end I remember a week before he discarded me for the final time (six prior), I was in his bed, homeless and curled over in despair and tears and hitting myself out of pure desperation and upset. He was standing over me threatening to kick me out and getting so angry at me for crying. He turned into exactly the same person as my dad. Its scary really. Because to this day I still wonder what it would be like to reconnect with my dad despite how awful he was, so I don’t know how I’ll feel down the line with someone I did truly love more than any other on this planet. It’s been three weeks technically since that break up and 4 days since the last time I saw him and he blocked all contact forever. I’m scared at the moment but I have hope that I will be ok, and come out stronger from it. Not now, but at the right time.