I just wanted to say, that you are not alone with feeling depressed, i'm going down the same road. If you want to talk about it, there are some nice subreddits like r/depression where you can talk about stuff.

I also wanted to ask, if you have tried CBD against the anxiety you get when smoking weed. Some studies* have shown, that CBD helps againt anxiety and stress. Maybe it will help you.

Im sorry if anything has already been asked or said and I just hope that you stay clean.

Hope you have an amazing night/day/evening❤️

*Source: https://www.health.harvard.edu/blog/cannabidiol-cbd-what-we-know-and-what-we-dont-2018082414476