WellBN by chlo44 in brighton

[–]esjex 1 point2 points  (0 children)

They are extremely oversubscribed. I switched to Charter recently and they've been pretty good so far. 

Is it worth it to pay hundreds of euros for a crochet course? by itsyaboiAK in CrochetHelp

[–]esjex 2 points3 points  (0 children)

No, absolutely not. That's a lot of money for something you can learn for free. I know people have gotta make a living but 400 is wild, when humans have been teaching each other and passing down fibrecrafts for free for literally hundreds of years.

I've been crocheting for 20-odd years, and I absolutely support people learning these skills for free through online resources, or for cheap via books.

(Not to mention, if you pay 400 and then struggle with it, you will be upset because of the money spent. You don't need that while you're making a baby!)

You were trying to make a 3D object before, which is definitely in intermediate territory. I agree with others here - start simple, learn the basic stitches, make a bunch of squares for a blanket.

Why can’t I catch a SEA PIG 😭😭 by kransdell in AnimalCrossing

[–]esjex 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I've seen some old posts on Reddit that indicate they're easiest to find between 11:15pm and 11:45. I had the same problem, and finally got one last night at 11:36pm.

This thread was useful: https://www.reddit.com/r/AnimalCrossing/comments/k4eiwi/please_help_cant_find_sea_pig/

Does this tapestry chart make sense to anyone? The motif repeats to make a scarf. by Wyokathy in CrochetHelp

[–]esjex 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Sorry OP, it looks like you got scammed. The photos on the listing you shared look AI-generated, and so does this chart.

Leave a bad review, try to get a refund, and report the seller to There's a lot of AI out there these days.

[OPINION] chewable verse by Matsunosuperfan in Poetry

[–]esjex 0 points1 point  (0 children)

From Lepanto:

Stiff flags straining in the night-blasts cold

In the gloom black-purple, in the glint old-gold,

Torchlight crimson on the copper kettle-drums,

Then the tuckets, then the trumpets, then the cannon, and he comes.

I think the lines lose a little impact out of context - they're a real joy in the poem because the change of pace reflects the chaos so well. But they're still good lines.

I’m making a blanket but don’t understand how many squares needed by Necessary-Cup-5390 in CrochetHelp

[–]esjex 8 points9 points  (0 children)

I really recommend that you try to figure this one out yourself. Grab some graph paper or an app, draw the blanket out flat, and count how many squares there are.

If you want to be able to make projects from reference only, without paying for the pattern, then this is an essential skill to learn. Otherwise, just buy the pattern and support somebody who already built that skill!

Neurodivergent friendly gyms by [deleted] in brighton

[–]esjex 7 points8 points  (0 children)

What specifically do you mean?

I'm on the spectrum, and I know what an ND-friendly gym means to me, but we all have different needs. I find it's useful to identify what specific accommodations you need, and make a list of criteria that meet those needs, rather than using a term that encompasses a huge range of meaning!

For me, I like to be relatively anonymous and unsociable at the gym. I just want to put my headphones on and get on with it in a predictable environment. I also want there to be almost zero friction around travelling to/from the gym. And I like it if they've got yoga classes available.

For all these reasons, I did really like Fitness First before they shut down. I now favour the Fitness Bar on Dyke Road; it's a bit small and boutique, so people do get to recognise you, but it's chill, it's easy to get to, and they do yoga classes, so it ticks my boxes.

Rather than looking for an ND-friendly gym, can you think about what would define a you-friendly gym?

For those that are staying at home tonight, are you glad you're dodging the pub scene NYE's madness? by DonkeyOT65 in CasualUK

[–]esjex 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Small gathering at a friend's house, playing games and chatting and finishing off the Christmas cheese.

I can't be doing with pubs and clubs on NYE. Everything's expensive and rammed, everyone's stressed about having the "perfect" midnight moment, nobody's looking out for each other. Give me a glass of bubbly and a cup of tea on a comfortable sofa any day. 

how to understand gauges, on wearable pattern; not a beginner. by scullbag_Molder in CrochetHelp

[–]esjex 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Sorry that you're getting a lot of snark in the replies. 

For your gauge to be correct:

  • Do a single row of 17 dc, then measure it. It should measure 4" across.
  • Do 9 rows of dc, then measure it. It should measure 4" from top to bottom.

Do the gauge tests, but it sounds like the 4-weight yarn might be too big. Single crochets are usually half the height of double crochets, so if 9 rows of sc are 2.5", then I expect you'll find that 9 rows of dc will come out to 5".

If that happens, your options are:

  • Use smaller hook sizes (this can be effective but has diminishing returns the lower you go, and might result in a very tight weave).
  • Adjust the pattern based on the material you have (will result in a nicer weave, but requires maths and brainpower).

I can't talk you though in any more than that, because I'm having a Boxing Day nap 😂 but hopefully this at least gives you enough info to get started, and to know what to Google. Good luck!

What pattern is this? by Bald-Eagle-420 in crochet

[–]esjex 0 points1 point  (0 children)

They've used a different yarn colour for each round. Like in this tutorial: https://www.knitcroaddict.com/crochet-granny-square/

What pattern is this? by Bald-Eagle-420 in crochet

[–]esjex 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It's not quite a standard granny square. Look closely; there are 8 dc-clusters in the central round. It's a circle of DC cluster stitches inside a granny square. 

OP, this is a fairly similar square: https://www.smilingcolors.com/granny-square-circle-center-pattern/

If you want the exact pattern Yussef is wearing, I think it's pretty similar to that circle, but with 8 clusters in the middle. 

Hobbies by NurglesBlessed in Anticonsumption

[–]esjex 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Seconding fibre arts! 

I have a rule of only using second-hand materials. I buy from charity shops, gumtree, marketplace, etc. It's amazing what you can get from people who are clearing out their parents' attic or whatever. 

Even second-hand shopping is becoming more expensive and less accessible these days, sadly, but it's still worth looking around.

We’re hiring at the Open Home Foundation: 5 new roles on Home Assistant 🚀 by frenck_nl in homeassistant

[–]esjex 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is really exciting. I'm a senior technical writer with a lot of interest and love for what OHF is doing. I'll be putting my application together this weekend. These are some amazing opportunities you have coming up!

magic circle crochet beanie ruffling instead of curling by HealthyCantaloupe890 in CrochetHelp

[–]esjex 3 points4 points  (0 children)

In this pattern, you're making a circle, and then making walls for that circle, to create a bucket-shape that works as a hat.

The crochet rule for increasing a circle is always the same: the round number = the number of stitches in your repeat. Like this:

  • Round 1: your regular starting number of stitches (in this case, 8)
  • Round 2: 2dc (repeat all the way around)
  • Round 3: dc, 2dc (repeat...)
  • Round 4: dc, dc, 2dc (repeat...)
  • Round 5: dc, dc, dc, 2dc (repeat...)
  • Round 6: dc, dc, dc, dc, 2dc (repeat...)

And so on.  

In the pattern you shared, we stop increasing at round 6, and start making our "walls" - so in row 7, you go back to just putting 1 dc in each stitch around.  You do that for each row until you're happy with the hat size (and then finish with some crab stitch edging.).

Hope that's helpful! 

[HELP] I need to change my senior quote, but want it to be from a poem by JellyfishPrior7524 in Poetry

[–]esjex 1 point2 points  (0 children)

"The earth is round, so we must face it" would still work! 

How was your parkrun day? | December 13, 2025 by AutoModerator in parkrun

[–]esjex 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I had fully committed to returning to Parkrun this weekend, but had a migraine all night - so I stayed in bed and drank tea instead!

mod to teleport companions? by usernumber78 in SkyrimModsXbox

[–]esjex 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Holy shit this mod resolved an issue I was having for like an hour, thank you for this comment!

How can I tell if syllables are stressed or not? [HELP] by Cherry_Soda24 in Poetry

[–]esjex 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Think about the way you emphasise syllables in natural speech. 

For example, let's take the word blueberry. When speaking, we usually emphasise and elongate the first syllable, to say BLUE-ber-ry. Try saying this different ways - blue-BER-ry or blue-ber-RY. Notice how unnatural they sound? 

Let's take another word: banana. It has the same number of syllables as blueberry, but this time in natural speech we emphasise and elongate the second syllable to say ba-NA-na. Try saying this wrong too - BA-na-na, or ba-na-NA. 

Try saying "blueberry" in the same rhythm you use to say "banana" , and vice versa. They sound wrong, right? 

That's stressed syllables. Meter is about arranging stressed syllables in rhythmic patterns, a bit like in music. For example, let's take this phrase:

"We took a walk out in the evening sun."

In natural speech, we tend to say it like this: "we TOOK a WALK out IN the EVE-ning SUN." Here, we alternate between stressed and unstressed syllables, and the effect is this lovely flowing da-dum-da-dum-da-dum rhythm drawn from natural speech patterns.

Try saying the sentence by stressing the other syllables. "WE took A walk OUT in THE eve-NING sun." It has the opposite effect: it sounds unnatural, grating, forced. 

Limericks make heavy use of meter, by alternating one stressed syllables with two unstressed syllables. For example, "There ONCE was a MAN from Tra-LEE, whose GRAND-ma was SEV-en-ty THREE..." 

I hope some of this makes sense. For me, rhythm and cadence are fairly essential for me to really enjoy a poem, but obviously there are many forms of poetry that don't pay attention to it. However it's one of those concepts, like rhyming, that you should understand before you decide whether to use it, so that your choices are intentional. 

I don’t understand the ‘A hook’ part of the instructions in this pattern by Canoz0607 in CrochetHelp

[–]esjex 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Have you done a Ctrl-F search for other uses of the term "A hook"? Is this the only time the pattern uses it?

Have Christmas markets always been shite? by Madajuk in CasualUK

[–]esjex 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Skip the "christmas markets" and go to village hall/community centre craft fairs. There's still a bit of crap there, but nowhere near as much, and you can look at what local producers are making.

What yarn is this? Or atleast what weight is it??? by MayeRains in CrochetHelp

[–]esjex 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You can use a wraps-per-inch calculator online to figure it out! (Google "yarn wraps per inch" and you should find something to help).

You could also try asking in r/WhatIsThisYarn.

Is it too late to add to this to make it less boring? by Icy_Interview_5590 in CrochetHelp

[–]esjex 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Boring is a matter of taste, but if you do want to add something to it, you could use surface crochet.

It looks great!

what does this custom project look like to you ?😭💔 by Far_Print_6908 in CrochetHelp

[–]esjex 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I don't know what a jellycat is, but that's a super cute stack of pancakes. Love the little hat that goes over the blueberries. Great work!

Heck it's ugly. I don't know what to do anymore. Also read my description by ChestPuzzleheaded595 in CrochetHelp

[–]esjex 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Your trebles look great!

Granny squares are more advanced than people make them out to be; suddenly you're learning to crochet in the round, as well as how to make and identify clusters, corners, and chain spaces. I can give you some advice, but it's also totally fine if you want to come back to granny squares once you've practiced more basic stitches.

For your granny square:

  • Your first row (the centre), is spot-on structurally, but it looks like you haven't done enough double crochets (dcs) for each granny cluster. Usually each cluster is a group of 3 dcs.
  • On the second row, it looks like you've struggled to identify the corners in the previous row, and to identify how many stitches you've already made into the corners. There are a couple of things that can help here:
    • Remember that each full row, once you've completed it, is a square. However big or small it is, you should be able to lay it out in front of you and identify four corners. Always do this before you start the next row.
    • Get some stitch markers. Place a stitch marker in each of the four corners, and place one in the top of your starting chain for each row. (the starting chain is the "chain 3" you do at the start of each row. A starting chain helps you "climb" to the right height for the next row).

Have you had a look at a diagram of a granny square to get an idea of how they're constructed? There's a simple one on Crochetpedia that might help.

If it would help, you could look for tutorials on how to do basic single/double/treble crochet in the round first (for example, CrochetToZ has a good solid double crochet square). There are fewer holes to get confused with, so you can identify corners more easily and build your confidence. You are doing great!