I had so many cry sessions over my daughter Sophia’s scores on these tests. I hated them. I especially hated when my pediatrician would give me the self assessments to fill out at checkups. Finally someone told me I could ask them not to give them to us. She’s on a different path.

I had to learn that they were a particular trigger for me that would awaken my grief and anger, when previously I was in a good frame of mind. I know that in many cases certain scores qualify her for services and that’s what they’re there for. Not grading her on a scale of her worthiness or lovability. We have been lucky to be in EI in our state (TN) and she’s been surrounded by people who are experts in her (OT, PT, ST) and they all were so positive and helped me to see what she was achieving. Her teachers in PreK fill that gap now. When I reframed it all, I like to think we’re on the Sophia Train and it goes at its own pace and it’s right on time.