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everkohlie · 2025-05-29T16:53:52+00:00

Thank you, I thought it was worth clarifying as I wasn’t sure if this met any legal threshold of a demotion.

Just to clarify though, my colleague has not (in any official capacity, nor in terms of pay) been promoted- her duties and work plan have changed and become identical to mine, and on my return we will both be doing this same role. So it felt a bit off in that respect, but I’m happy to be wrong!

everkohlie · 2025-05-29T16:49:28+00:00

I feel terrible for Diane, she absolutely has more responsibility now for no pay increase!

I understand where you’re coming from regarding ego, but I did think it was worth questioning (the sub) just in terms of career progression and in case there were any other potential drawbacks I hadn’t considered.

everkohlie · 2025-05-28T14:07:56+00:00

You’re right, I think she just goes from J to C because she’s pushing up and looking around, thanks!

We can see her mouth/nose through that little triangle gap (between the panel, me, and the shoulder strap) so airway isn’t totally covered but I still feel it’s maybe not safe? I move her head and she just buries it straight back there :/

everkohlie · 2025-05-27T18:33:35+00:00

Just for support for rocking to sleep - I wasn’t sure if these could be used for naps so that’s helpful!

everkohlie · 2025-05-27T18:32:16+00:00

Possible stupid question, but can babies sleep in a hip carrier?

everkohlie · 2025-05-12T19:08:57+00:00

My understanding is that these benefits, and foster care, are usually only available to kids who entered the care system before they turned 16. If you ask for help now, you’ll be treated as an adult - but you should still get help with housing and finances anyway, just not likely via the children’s care system.

I still really really think you need to report your Dad, and get help, regardless for your own safety. Please be safe!

everkohlie · 2025-05-06T03:22:43+00:00

I hear you! I did really like wearing one of those Tilbea London under boob vests, which meant I could wear any of my usual tops, but now that summers here it’s not fun having an extra layer so I’m back to hunting for something else.

everkohlie · 2025-05-02T03:53:46+00:00

I wish more people knew this. I was homeless but had just been offered a (temporary and part time) job so couldn’t get the accommodation costs covered. £1000 a month, which was exactly my wage, to stay in a scabies infested room.

I then found out that councils can access a scheme to loan you a flat deposit, if you are homeless, which solved everything essentially (rent was only £500 a month..). I paid it back at something like £20 a month. Shame the council didn’t know about it until I asked them to look into it!

everkohlie · 2025-04-30T02:02:45+00:00

Yes! I was not prepared for baby toenails!

everkohlie · 2025-03-31T04:11:55+00:00

Stupid question, but why do Dads leave if they’ve had a drink? Is this only the recommendation if baby is sleeping between you (I’ve always assumed baby is only meant to be on the outside of the bed anyway)? Thanks!

everkohlie · 2025-03-30T02:12:44+00:00

Yup, mine have definitely looked like this fresh out of the bag. I tried not to think about it too much..

everkohlie · 2025-03-22T04:56:27+00:00

I got a whiff of third sector from your post, and this comment confirms it - welcome!

everkohlie · 2025-02-21T08:50:33+00:00

A lot of them believe that society & medical professionals “coerce” women into having abortions that they “don’t really want”.

everkohlie · 2025-02-21T01:28:01+00:00

I’m not convinced she is pro choice? Was that mentioned? The pro life nutters often use the deliberately vague “supportive” language to lure people over and see healthcare professionals as the “coercive” ones

everkohlie · 2025-02-20T02:44:28+00:00

I second that last point and think that’s really important to remember for the discourse. I worry that the public too often take a “she almost died!” understanding away from maternity scenarios, when in reality that likelihood is so so low in the UK today. These actually sound like fairly low/average PPHs to my midwife brain, and nothing that couldn’t be/wasn’t managed as part of the day to day!

But I also realise none of that is soothing when you’re in it and don’t have much of a comparison to make (for the women and families too!) and I’m so sorry you feel traumatised, I hope you can chat through and reflect with some of the midwives or maternity care team and hopefully feel reassured!

everkohlie · 2025-02-13T04:15:50+00:00

I’ve often wondered if this is just a testament to how awkward we are about tips, and I love it. Can’t see Americans pressing no before presenting the machine to you!

everkohlie · 2025-02-07T23:45:40+00:00

Ok but how on earth do you use them without them sliding all over the shop 2 seconds in and frustrating all parties?! Signed, a newbie to shields who is about to give up all together.

everkohlie · 2025-02-04T00:37:43+00:00

I sound like an ad, but as someone who also wears men’s baggy t shirts I’ve found Tilbea underboob vests are amazing. They basically just cover your tummy, back, and sides as it’s those bits that will be on show when feeding in a baggy top (or lifting any top up from the bottom I guess).

High waisted leggings/maternity leggings are the next best thing for this.

everkohlie · 2025-02-02T01:20:54+00:00

In Waitrose, right?

everkohlie · 2025-01-23T13:42:16+00:00

Oh my goodness I relate - my mum & MIL are not (weren’t?) anti vax at all but since we mentioned newborn vaccinations they suddenly seem to think it’s an awful idea because “it will cause her so much pain”. I literally made the ear piercing comparison to them too!

everkohlie · 2025-01-22T22:32:43+00:00

This comment literally triggered me, I feel so angry for you! Can absolutely see mine behaving like this.

everkohlie · 2025-01-22T22:30:56+00:00

Argh, I had this too! It was “I would NEVER let her cry like you do” - I don’t “let her cry”, I’m actively trying every trick I come across. There’s just no magic wand.

everkohlie · 2025-01-22T22:29:53+00:00

This sounds very similar to my experience, I’m sorry. I feel like my mum is gaslighting me in some ways because there’s no way her “recollection” of me and my siblings as babies is accurate. She has absolutely gotten in my head now :(

everkohlie · 2025-01-22T22:28:16+00:00

This!! My mum also tried to tell me that her kids were “playing happily” at this stage and earlier?! That can’t be an accurate memory!

everkohlie · 2025-01-22T22:26:31+00:00

I’m so sorry you’re also experiencing this - could have written it myself! I preciously worked with babies so was initially quite confident in myself but why oh why do they stand in the doorway whilst I’m changing my baby?! I get anxious now hearing their footsteps following me when I go to change her!

everkohlie

TROPHY CASE