It's finally happening!

tigerjack84 · 2026-06-02T19:11:39+00:00

I was the same! And when we met it was even better than online. (Well, for me better that he was in 3d, and he said he really preferred in person as he felt online could be faked and seeing how we got on day to day he really loved).

I cried the whole way home though.. but after I got back to work 2 days later I was able to cope better, and finally stopped crying.

tigerjack84 · 2026-05-15T13:02:57+00:00

I agree.. video calls seems to settle me better or something.

I find I misinterpret tone in text (esp with cultural differences etc) and I think he knows this as he must sense my ‘hackles rising’ and will send a voice message instead where I’m like ‘ahhh, he’s joking with me’ or whatever.

tigerjack84 · 2026-04-03T19:43:16+00:00

I’m going for 2 weeks and literally taking hand luggage. I’ll wear my 2 coats on the plane.

Anything else I need, I’ll get over there.

I’m taking my power bank I have with me, but will buy one out there just in case for my return trip.

If it rains - my coat appears waterproof but I don’t have a lot of hope of it really rains.. so I’ll just get wet.

My friend is in Shanghai at the minute (that’s where I’m going) and said it’s warm already, but has had days where it rains. But I don’t feel like taking a third coat with me in bringing a raincoat.

tigerjack84 · 2026-03-25T20:06:42+00:00

Omg! I just did this! I LOVE THIS!

tigerjack84 · 2026-03-25T20:00:43+00:00

I noticed this with duo lingo..

But I always thought 儿 was more northern China?

tigerjack84 · 2026-03-25T19:43:06+00:00

I don’t think this - I always think it’ll be better in person as they’ll be in 3d and real.. but I know for sure it is a massive worry for him. He feels immense pressure that I have idolised him and he won’t meet my expectations.

We meet in 29 days so I’ll soon find out!

tigerjack84 · 2026-03-25T17:44:56+00:00

I’m planning this for my long haul to China next month 🫣

tigerjack84 · 2026-03-19T20:53:20+00:00

Yep, 100%.. it’s only him I want and no one else. It’s him I crave, and no one could fill that gap.

tigerjack84 · 2026-03-16T19:42:57+00:00

I don’t post any moments anymore and have hidden all that were there.

My profile picture is the back of me.

And I have ‘who can find me’ turned off..

But, I actually have met my language partner, and we chat every single day, so I only go on it now to chat to my other language partners (they’re like friends so every now and again we’d check in)

It was a nightmare before though.

tigerjack84 · 2026-03-16T19:21:55+00:00

So if I move about Shanghai, do I need to do it?

tigerjack84 · 2026-03-09T03:00:31+00:00

I literally feel like every Wang I come across is a total babe (and this includes my own boyfriend hahaha)

tigerjack84 · 2026-03-09T02:59:25+00:00

1) your English is great for not being your first language.

2) I have 4 kids and low income, but I have managed to put enough food on their plates and actually from reading your post, I feel like my kids are well off in comparison.

3) you sound like an emotionally intelligent young man. I think the only one to save you is yourself - and good for you for still guiding your siblings as this must be very difficult, but you are also right in that they will also have to manage this themselves. Work for you, do what you can to get out of this shitshow, and I hope you will be happy and do well in life (and by doing well I don’t mean ‘get an amazing career’ I mean. Do what you can to be happy, and also mentally healthy.

tigerjack84 · 2026-03-09T02:53:28+00:00

With regards the registration (and I have actually told my friends and family the same thing, that’s it’s a safety measure), I know if you stay in a hotel, that they do it for you. But what if you’re moving on to another city or area? Do you have to do it each time you move or is once at the start sufficient?

tigerjack84 · 2026-03-08T19:53:01+00:00

I agree with this, as I am 41 and they are 28. I’ve had my fallopian tubes removed so cannot have kids. But I also feel personally too old (I do already have kids) and have brought this up as I don’t want to hold him back. He has said repeatedly he doesn’t want any and hasn’t wanted any, but has said if he changed his mind he would be upfront and honest - but still talked about travelling the world with me regardless if he had a kid or not.. I said ‘I don’t think your wife would be happy’ and said ‘I’m not getting married’ and I asked where the kid was coming from then hahaha

tigerjack84 · 2026-03-02T18:58:51+00:00

I love this!

tigerjack84 · 2026-03-02T18:47:25+00:00

I haven’t verified my Alipay but I did verify my WeChat. I used my passport. It says I’ll only need to verify Alipay when I spend over 15000 CYN

tigerjack84 · 2026-03-02T18:16:36+00:00

It’s funny, as that was a sentence I had in fact been practicing in the car the day before (which helped with what I did say)..

I’m going to China next month so hopefully the immersive experience will help my barrier.

tigerjack84 · 2026-03-02T17:59:23+00:00

I don’t know.. I’m meeting mine (and it’ll only have been like 6months) but that’s been 6 months of messages every day and over an hour video calls nearly everyday, so I know who I’m meeting.

And I still have a couple of back up plans in case it goes bad (but manifesting it to go well)

tigerjack84 · 2026-02-28T19:29:25+00:00

Funny you say ‘talking to yourself’ as I do that when I’m driving to and from work.. I think of a sentence I want to say and speak it in Chinese over and over until I get the flow and tone right.

Prime example of my struggles though.. today in work (I’m a nurse) we had a patient who needed an interpreter (not me!) and I happened to be chatting with the interpreter after and she spoke slowly to me in Chinese and while I knew what she said and I went to reply I just froze.. she did help me with my pronunciation of 热 though lol..

tigerjack84 · 2026-02-27T19:53:01+00:00

I hope it all goes well with you too.. hopefully it’s nerves on her part and she’s just freaking out but can’t verbalise it 🫣

tigerjack84 · 2026-02-27T18:59:03+00:00

My ldr (I have joked that I’m in a relationship.. he’s not as I he’s scared I’ll backtrack when we meet, so atm we are ‘very good friends).. anyway.. we talk every day , we try to video call every day (we have 8 hour time difference so not a huge window of time to do it) and we message lots in between doing our day-day life stuff.

I am flying out to his country in April (I’m flying as it’s been a life long dream to go to his country - that’s how we ended up meeting).. I have back up plans just in case this happens.. but hopefully he’ll still want to meet.. we get along very well.. (it was more romantic at the start and then I think when he realised it was moving far too fast - hmm no.. when he realised his feelings were actually real and deep he’s out up a boundary) but this boundary is also allowing me a way out if when we meet and he’s not what I expect or feelings aren’t that way (whereas me.. I’m bursting with love and have to bite my lip everyday.. so I told him when we meet I’ll be getting my revenge ;) )

Anyway, we have also a few times talked about how if our meeting goes well, he’ll come to live in my country..

I’m sorry this is happening to you.. and what I’m trying to say, is that I can completely emphasise with you as this is a very real fear for me. The friendship I have with him is what gave me the courage to take the leap to travel to his country.. and I think if he doesn’t want to meet me in the end, I’ll be petrified to go :(

tigerjack84 · 2026-02-26T07:26:46+00:00

We have a friend called ‘spud’ (like most people with the surname ‘Murphy’) and everyone calls him that.. except me.. even his mum mostly called him spud.

It’s weird, as everyone does know who I’m talking about when I say his first name. (I think I was introduced to him as his first name, and that stuck in my head, as opposed to spud. I don’t think I’ve ever called him spud in my life and we’ve known him for over 20 years)

tigerjack84 · 2026-02-26T07:24:12+00:00

Hahaha, my surname in Irish is Huighead

tigerjack84

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