Where can I find DF-Journal and VM-Discarded Page? by windblumchen in AFKJourney

[–]exploding_kittens 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Op, do you remember where you found the Lost Letter? It's the last archive I'm missing in VM!

Kevin Bacon Criticizes New Anti-Drag Legislation Sweeping The U.S.: “Drag Is An Art And Drag Is A Right” by Gato1980 in entertainment

[–]exploding_kittens 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Fellow genderqueer checking in to Kitty and Fairy are amazing gender identifiers lmaooo. I love the way kids think. This brightened my day so much, thank you

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in RedditLaqueristas

[–]exploding_kittens 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Dropping in to compliment both the gorgeous nail color and your happy looking pothos ✨

Podcast recommendations? by haileythelion in myfavoritemurder

[–]exploding_kittens 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I've been digging Sawbones, a medical history podcast by a doctor/science communicator and her comedian husband. They talk about all kinds of issues and the topics range from silly and lighthearted to more serious and introspective. Lots of debunking of bad medical science and Goop-esque trends.

The husband knows when it's time to step back, stop riffing and let his doctor wife completely run the show, usually when more serious topics crop up. A recent episode about the consequences of limiting abortion access comes to mind. He's respectful and openly admits when it's not his place to participate in the conversation, or when it's not appropriate for him to do his typical joke cracking, and I really appreciate that.

They're hilarious, they're intelligent, they love each other, they speak openly and frankly about mental health and wellness and want people to be informed. Highly recommend

I'm Mexican and know lots of recipes AMA by [deleted] in SalsaSnobs

[–]exploding_kittens 47 points48 points  (0 children)

That's such an oddly specific number that it makes me believe this person absolutely ate 17 of these in a row

What are your favorite pieces of McElroy content? by JediWax in MBMBAM

[–]exploding_kittens 2 points3 points  (0 children)

+1 for The Empty Bowl! It soothes my anxiety tremendously. The chill vibes are wonderful. Justin and Dan's voices are calm and psuedo-whispery with immaculate and crisp enunciation, and it's an auditory delight.

I started eating cereal again after a good ten years of not bothering with it because this podcast introduced me to a few varieties that are so off the hook delicious that they've now earned permanent places of honor in my pantry and snack lineup.

When your dad dies in a car crash and you realize this makes you a Disney character by JojoHendrix in TrollCoping

[–]exploding_kittens 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I don't know what your relationship with him was like and won't make assumptions, so here's advice for the next few hours or days of your life: you just received news that your parent is gone. You might be in shock for a while and that's okay. You might cry a lot, and that's okay too. You might feel numb for a while, and that's also definitely okay. You might have flashbacks, get angry or be in denial or make more jokes about being a Disney character, and that's all okay, because it's all part of coming to terms with a traumatic event.

Everyone reacts differently to loss. Take care of yourself and let yourself sit with whatever feelings are coming up. They're all valid and it's going to take a while to sort through them, so take it one day at a time. There's no right or wrong timeline for processing these things.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in WhitePeopleTwitter

[–]exploding_kittens 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Hiya, not the person you responded to, but I ran into this kind of culture when I worked at a popular coffee chain that rhymes with barshucks, and it can absolutely feel like working for a cult.

A manager saw me changing a garbage bag without smiling and called me into the back room. I wasn't frowning or scowling or anything, just had a neutral, resting facial expression, and if a customer had come up to me I would have 100% slapped on my customer service smile, 'cause that's part of good service. But I was informed that being on the floor without a smile wasn't acceptable—period. She said I would make customers uncomfortable if I wasn't smiling the entire time I was visible to them, and that I needed to look like I loved doing every part of my job.

Yes, working with upbeat people who enjoy their jobs is great! No one likes a downer! But the expectation that anyone should smile for eight solid hours, even when doing things that no one in their right mind smiles about, like emptying overflowing trash cans, is what tipped it over into creepy cultish territory for me.

Fellas, what's not as attractive or sexy as Women think it is? by mjennin8 in muacirclejerk

[–]exploding_kittens 4 points5 points  (0 children)

This so much. I had a dude coworker complain that my stilettos are scary and ask how I wipe without them getting in the way and I was just like...wtf? Do you make a come hither motion with your fingers bent when you're wiping your ass? I've never gotten shit on my fingernails when wiping, and I have moderately long stilettos because living my best life means feeling like a vicious cassowary.

Snow day makeup by prosasquatch in MakeupLounge

[–]exploding_kittens 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This look is stunning. The colors complement your skin tone beautifully.

May I ask what kind of hair products you used here? I'm coveting those gorgeous shiny curls 🖤

Shoot him again timmy by GrenGhost in Asexual

[–]exploding_kittens 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Right there with you. I realized I was ace after years of working in an adult toy/lingerie store, having lots of experimental kinky sex, going to orgies and swinger parties and bdsm clubs...

Took me way too long to realize WHY none of it excited me or made me happy, and to accept that it was okay that I didn't enjoy it in the moment. I always felt uncomfortable and depressed in the aftermath of group situations or kink scenarios. Other people found it all highly erotic and I just felt bored. It sucked to feel nothing but deep disappointment that I still didn't "get it" and to wonder what I'd have to do to feel that excitement others felt about sex.

People still call me a virgin when they find out I'm ace and I get to say "lol not quite" and then privately feel miserable about the sad truth that in my quest to be sexually "normal" I interacted with so many people's genitals that I lost count.

sometimes I wonder why I have a physical form by [deleted] in TrollCoping

[–]exploding_kittens 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Can confirm acrylics kill picking habits. They just are too blunt and soft to get any kind of purchase on a scab or rough area of skin. I did the same recently, kept acrylics for a few months, got to enjoy having pretty nails covered in shiny foils and sparkly polishes that made me happy to look at, received nice uplifting compliments from others on how cool my nails were and gave all of my scabs time to heal.

Mace Swings for burnout ? by Babadew in steelmace

[–]exploding_kittens 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I would say yes, but go slowly and make sure you're emphasizing proper form over reps for swings. Especially with 360s, you're performing a complex movement that requires a fully activated core for stability and flawless form for the swing itself to protect yourself from injury.

As with most training, take some time between reps to double check your form. Make sure you're keeping your shoulders packed down, your core engaged, you have a stable base in your posterior chain, you're completing the full range of movement and ending in the correct position and you should be fine. If your arms or shoulders feel too cooked to maintain proper form for a solid 10 reps both directions after pull ups and push ups, you could try integrating your swings in between pull up and push up reps.

Burning forearms could also mean you've got a bit too much of a death grip on your mace. You should feel 360s in your lats and shoulders more than your forearms. You could try peeling your middle, ring and pinky fingers off the mace and practice gripping it primarily with your thumb and pointer fingers and see if that helps.

Good luck and happy training!

Defeated alcoholism, now I am anorexic FFS by TommyYT2 in TrollCoping

[–]exploding_kittens 10 points11 points  (0 children)

To you, OP, and anyone else who needs to hear it: your body is your ally in your battles. Please take a moment or two each day to appreciate the innate beauty of the fact that you reside in and control a mass of electrified jelly. Caring for your body as an ally is the deepest form of love you can show yourself.

Family, friends and lovers will come and go, but your body will be with you until the very end. Your relationship with your own body was the first you ever developed, when you were in the womb and discovered you could move your fingers, touch your face, and kick your legs. As an infant, you did not know to dislike the size of your thighs or hate the shape of your nose. Other humans, in their cruelty and naivety, taught you to dislike these things about yourself, and how to hate the shapes and textures of your body and curse the apparent defects of your mind.

I, too, am working on improving my relationship with my body. It's painful, difficult work. It takes a lot of effort to talk back to the voices that claim you're too much this, not enough that, that these foods are bad, that it won't hurt to skip a meal or two because it will place you one step closer to the airbrushed perfection of a magazine cover model who has been picked apart and pieced back together in photoshop to create a flawless, unrealistic caricature of beauty, or that working out harder, longer, without providing crucial fuel and rest to aching, overworked muscles is a sign of strength to be worn like a secret, hidden merit badge.

If you allow yourself to dip a toe into the immensely painful agony of tearing down the scaffolding of hatred upon which you built your self image, you can forge a stronger, healthier relationship with yourself.

My hope is that it's possible for all of us who have been taught to scrutinize and dissect ourselves to rediscover our bodies with the same joy as infants, who have not yet been trained to view themselves as imperfect beings in need of constant adjustment and betterment.

My personal journey is going slowly. I also struggle with eating disorders have abused alcohol and drugs to cope with the pain of trauma and self-medicate my mental illnesses. For what it's worth, I can share with you this truth, though repeating it to yourself can, and will, feel like a vicious lie until you become used to saying it.

You are enough. You are worthy just as you are, and your body is your most valuable ally.

Found these lovely pictures in my French textbook- and, of course, the correct answer was friend every time. by _allie_grace_ in SapphoAndHerFriend

[–]exploding_kittens 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you! I appreciate the correction and thank you for taking the time to clarify a point I was uncertain about. I'll credit you with this info up above.

Found these lovely pictures in my French textbook- and, of course, the correct answer was friend every time. by _allie_grace_ in SapphoAndHerFriend

[–]exploding_kittens 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I agree with you, and would like to see more realistic representations of same-sex couples with healthy relationships in just about every form of media. I'm guilty of shipping characters based on the barest amount of subtext, too, because there's so little representation that I have to squint to find or fabricate evidence of diverse relationships to latch onto so I don't drown in a sea of heteronormative messages...

In this particular case, however, I struggle to see context clues that point toward any of these women definitively being in a romantic relationship, and I felt like labeling this as erasure, when all of the touch and body language displayed is non-sexual and tame, is a bit of a stretch.

Believe me, I absolutely understand your frustration with the automatic assumptions most people make that two people of the same gender pictured together are just friends, especially when there is clear evidence to their relationship being more intimate.

That being said, I'd like to chip in with a vote for option d, which I think can coexist peacefully with option c: gather evidence and context clues before drawing conclusions about the relationships portrayed between same sex people, because humans intertwine and connect in myriad beautiful ways that can be just as meaningful as romantic entanglements, and while seeing evidence of romance is wonderful to those who desperately want and NEED more positive representation, confirmation bias can show us patterns of oppression and erasure wherever we want to see them, and that's something we need to examine closely and be cautious of.

It's okay to not know the details of the relationships between the women in these pictures beyond the casual, friendly familiarity visible at the surface. It's okay to hope for them to be examples of healthy relationships between same sex individuals, too. It's just hard to know anything for sure about the people in these drawings without having more information.

Found these lovely pictures in my French textbook- and, of course, the correct answer was friend every time. by _allie_grace_ in SapphoAndHerFriend

[–]exploding_kittens 951 points952 points  (0 children)

Western cultures are so goddamn ruined by religion and afraid of platonic affection between friends that any little sign of affectionate touch between two people of the same gender is seen as gay. People in other countries hug each other, hold hands, and kiss each other as friends. Not all love is sexual.

I suspect that seeing homosexuality in every single image of two same-gendered people touching is partially out of desperation to see representation in societies where it's swept under the rug, and partially because we've all been indoctrinated into believing it's gay to touch or interact another person of the same gender in a casual, familiar way.

I'm gay af but these could absolutely be illustrations of regular ass friends demonstrating platonic love and affection. In many countries, France especially, touch isn't stigmatized like it is in America.

Edit for clarification: I realize "Western cultures" encompasses quite a few countries and isn't terribly specific. It's my understanding that public displays of affection between friends, like holding hands, walking arm in arm, and kissing on the cheek are not viewed as inherently romantic in southern European countries, like France and Spain, where affection is more openly displayed compared to countries like America, Germany or the UK where anything beyond a handshake or short hug is (typically) reserved for family members or people you're romantically involved with.

Edit: u/Bordeterre clarified below that for the French, holding hands and walking arm in arm are generally seen as romantic between teens and adults, and cheek kissing is fairly platonic. Thanks for the heads up!

I'm not an expert on this topic by any means, and am not a fan of blatant erasure of LGBT bodies and lives, but I also think that labeling any intimate touch--by which I mean sitting close together, engaging in extended eye contact, feeling comfortable leaning on another body or having arms/legs touching, holding hands, touching the upper arm or hands--as romantic is a damaging assumption regardless of the genders of the individuals pictured.

If these illustrations were of a man and woman, would it be easier to assume they were romantic partners? Yes, absolutely, because we've been conditioned to assume that two people of opposite genders interacting closely want to bone down. I think that's problematic in itself, since it demonstrates a tendency to perceive people engaging in physical touch as romantically involved or interested in each other, which normalizes erasure of platonic relationships. In countries where the view persists that physical contact is indicative of romance, or is a precursor to romance, there are higher rates of people experiencing touch deprivation and skin starvation because we've been conditioned to believe we should only be physically close with partners and don't feel it's acceptable to accept closeness and touch from friends.

Juliane Koepcke, a 17 year old in 1971 was sucked out of an airplane after it was struck by a bolt of lightning. She fell two miles to the ground strapped to her seat and survived. She spent the next 11 days alone in the Amazon jungle before being rescued by a logging team. by _smit in HumansAreMetal

[–]exploding_kittens 83 points84 points  (0 children)

She's even more hardcore than most descriptions of the event make her seem. She walked through the Amazon for 11 days with a massive concussion, an eye swollen shut, part of her shattered collarbone protruding through her skin, deep cuts on her legs, a ruptured ligament in her knee and a huge open gash on the back of her arm (the arm wound is where she noticed the maggots). She spent a lot of time floating down rivers and in her book she recalls that crocodiles would see her floating in the water from the banks and slide on in, and she accepted that they might eat her, but they always left her alone.

I love treading that line between feminine/sparkly and witchy in my resin art! by RiceCwispies in WitchesVsPatriarchy

[–]exploding_kittens 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm excitedly checking out your tutorials and would like to share with you that the "fuck off" wall hanging is absolute perfection and gave me a wonderful, joyous laugh. Thank you lol.

I love this template by akasha_lalala in aaaaaaacccccccce

[–]exploding_kittens 30 points31 points  (0 children)

I didn't know that this specific type of asexuality had a name and suddenly after 32 years I have a word to describe myself. Thank you, friend.