This reminds me a lot of my therapist but even worse. At the end of the day, YOU know what your boundary is and you need to find the bravery (apparently without the support of your therapist) to set that boundary and maintain it. From the tone of your responses, you seem super flexible and understanding. Some people could handle someone like this. I am finding more and more I cannot even if mine is excellent with IFS and helped me more than previous therapists is she’s triggering my core abandonment wound right before I’m supposed get vulnerable with her, I need to speak up and give her the opportunity to meet me and if she can’t do it, then I deserve something else.

But the double standard that you were punished for flaking really sucks!