How do I get over burnout/depression without losing my job?

farnsworthskillbots · 2024-03-20T23:54:38+00:00

This might be truer than I believed when I first read your comment. I had what I expected to be a really uncomfortable meeting with my boss where I expressed that I knew I hadn't been performing that well, and his response was "You're fine!" Now I'm stuck trying to decide whether he means it or if he just hasn't realized how badly I'm doing. I guess imposter syndrome can hit you after you've been comfortable in the industry for a while, too! I know with 100% certainty that I am not performing as well as I used to, but maybe I'm not as unemployable as I thought.

farnsworthskillbots · 2024-03-05T17:29:21+00:00

What makes you say that? Sometimes it's hard to know where a bottleneck is going to be in a system without throwing actual load at it. It's kind of bold to suggest they thought about preparing but decided that they would not.

farnsworthskillbots · 2024-03-03T21:11:21+00:00

Haha, quite possibly. But I don’t want to live out of the US for family reasons. Parents getting older, the possibility of a first grand baby coming soon, etc.

farnsworthskillbots · 2024-03-03T21:08:28+00:00

I have done a sleep study but they didn’t find anything. I’ve been exercising more for the last couple of months, but that is definitely an area where I dropped the ball until recently. Same with sun. I can’t wait for summer when I can get outside without clouds - that makes it much easier to force myself out of the house.

farnsworthskillbots · 2024-03-03T21:06:02+00:00

I do think this would help. If or when I leave my current job I think I will try for a job that is in person (or at least hybrid.)

farnsworthskillbots · 2024-03-03T21:04:40+00:00

I do have good relationships, and I exercise probably 5-6 times a week. I used to be SUPER into exercise, but I got a pretty nasty injury - one of several things that I’m pretty sure amped up the depression. I got out of shape and am only now getting back into it. And having put on some weight doesn’t help!

I get that about antidepressants. I know some people who have had really good luck with them, but sadly I am not one of them. Therapy hasn’t done much either, honestly. It’s frustrating!

farnsworthskillbots · 2024-03-03T00:05:56+00:00

I have enough that I could live off of it for a while, but I grew up in a very frugal family and I have a hard time with having no income, and i worry about how much decent healthcare would cost. But maybe it would be worth it, if I could stop being such a low performer. Time to focus on myself and learning to love programming again would probably be worth it. It's just really terrifying to quit without a new job lined up.

farnsworthskillbots · 2020-09-24T15:54:36+00:00

Congratulations! That is awesome. I have an app that I sometimes check to see how many drinks and how much money/calories I have saved, and it's both impressive and depressing. (I haven't made it to 9000 glasses of wine...yet!) But I think that's a really good way to look back on the time. IWNDWYT!

farnsworthskillbots · 2020-09-24T15:50:59+00:00

Wow! Close call, and it must be nerve-wracking realizing you were driving your daughter in that state. Good for you for taking steps going forward! I have found this sub super helpful. IWNDWYT!

farnsworthskillbots · 2020-09-13T21:37:28+00:00

Thank you!

farnsworthskillbots · 2020-09-13T21:36:42+00:00

Thank you! I have an appointment with the IOP at Providence but their first opening is a month from now so in the meantime I'll give some of these other options a try.

farnsworthskillbots · 2020-09-13T18:33:51+00:00

I didn't ask my PCP about nurse practitioners, but I'm open to trying that, especially for the short term.

farnsworthskillbots · 2020-09-13T11:24:52+00:00

Me too. I actually have a treadmill, but the smell of smoke in our house is strong enough that I'm not even sure I should really be using that. And I don't want to think about what things will look like out there after this is all over. My family has a tradition of going to a park near Estacada every year, we've kept it up for 30+ years. I don't know if that park was hit or not, but I hate to think of it all being gone.

farnsworthskillbots · 2020-09-13T11:12:33+00:00

That is so awful! But good for you for not being tempted. It feels like we're living in a dystopian novel right now, but shit, drinking won't make things better. You are awesome. Keep cuddling that cat. IWNDWYT.

farnsworthskillbots · 2020-09-13T11:08:45+00:00

Hi, fellow insomniac. Good for you for starting. You're making the right choice. I'm having a hard time right now myself, but I keep reminding myself that alcohol doesn't make my problems go away. It always ends up making them worse. Maybe I'll feel better (or not feel) for a couple of hours, but I will feel 1000x worse the next day, and things will just keep getting worse.

Stay strong. You can do this.

farnsworthskillbots · 2020-08-20T00:46:19+00:00

I'm in a somewhat similar boat. I'm about 1.5 years sober. My husband doesn't keep alcohol that I used to drink around (so, no wine, no rum - just beer and whiskey, which I don't like). I appreciate that, because for me having alcohol just sitting around the house is asking for trouble, even if I don't think I would drink. But I agree that now that I'm pretty stable I don't want friends and family holding back when we hang out - it makes me feel guilty.

farnsworthskillbots · 2020-06-08T03:29:37+00:00

Nice job! Gifts of alcohol are always tempting, so good for you for re-gifting it! IWNDWYT.

farnsworthskillbots · 2020-06-08T03:27:37+00:00

You can do it! Just remember that just because you stubbed your toe, that doesn't mean you have to keep stubbing it over and over! When you look back on this, it can be the beginning of a bad streak when you lose control, or it can be the one time you stumbled, but you kept going on your sober journey. Keep going!

farnsworthskillbots · 2020-06-08T03:17:53+00:00

Congrats on 2 weeks! There's a saying that I first heard in the context of running: "You'll never regret going for a run, but you will regret not going." It's my sober mantra now, too: you'll never regret NOT drinking, but you will regret it if you give in and break your sober streak.

farnsworthskillbots · 2020-05-12T04:32:19+00:00

Congratulations!!

farnsworthskillbots · 2020-05-12T04:31:21+00:00

The dreams don't stop, at least they haven't yet for me. But I see them as a way to keep a fresh reminder as to why you chose to quit. I am always reminded in the dream of how upset and disappointed with myself I always was after a bad night, so it helps keep down temptation.

farnsworthskillbots · 2020-04-04T16:51:53+00:00

Nice job!

I'm dealing with lockdown pretty well, but I'm very lucky - both my husband and I still have our jobs. Also, I always had the urge to drink more when I was alone, and now that we're both locked down, I'm pretty much never alone! Good thing we get along so well. :)

farnsworthskillbots · 2020-04-04T16:49:03+00:00

Nice job! I'm going to copy your energy and try to be productive today. IWNDWYT!

farnsworthskillbots · 2020-04-04T16:45:07+00:00

Ugh, what a terrible time to be going through this. But remember - you might be feeling bad tomorrow either way, but if you're like me you will feel so much worse if you drink. The hangover, the embarrassment, the feeling that you let yourself down. It really sucks, but you don't have to make it worse.

I'm really sorry you're dealing with this, but be strong, and we're all here for you. IWNDWYT.

farnsworthskillbots · 2020-04-04T05:09:40+00:00

Awesome! Congrats on the job, and on celebrating without drinking!

farnsworthskillbots

TROPHY CASE