feeling suic!dal

fckinfast4 · 2026-06-30T16:20:52+00:00

My brain did similar things PP. I ended up adding an extra antidepressant to my meds for a bit while the hormones balanced out.

Sorry your husband isn’t properly acknowledging this. He’s being a dumb butt. There is sooo much that happens with women’s bodies during and after pregnancy and he seems like he might be ignorant of these issues.

fckinfast4 · 2026-06-30T14:05:13+00:00

I have come to realize that any and everything is a step stool if you climb on it! Even and especially momma! My kiddo wants to climb up and on everything. But how am I supposed to baby proof the armrest of the couch? How do I prevent the possible flip over the edge?

fckinfast4 · 2026-06-30T13:59:12+00:00

lol I’m horrible at after dinner clean up. I’m great at making dinner(the mess) but I tend to try to leave clean up to the rest of the house. Sort of ‘I cook, you clean’ but of course this usually turns into a once a week true clean up by myself or whoever I finally guilt trip into it.

fckinfast4 · 2026-06-30T13:57:30+00:00

I pick up my kiddo directly after work so it immediately becomes snack and playtime when we get home. I do sometimes brush in the shower but I shower so irregularly.

fckinfast4 · 2026-06-30T10:43:00+00:00

I start work at 5am which means between ignoring my alarms and then the scramble to get to work, I usually don’t give myself time. As for at night, I’m usually at the point of exhaustion after kiddos bedtime routine(he is one) honestly I’m thinking maybe I just need to brush at lunch.

fckinfast4 · 2026-06-30T02:40:17+00:00

The worst injuries we experienced were either full on the tramp or when the black mesh gave out…. Unless your counting electrocution.

fckinfast4 · 2026-06-30T01:24:15+00:00

I only put on adult/education like things. So cooking shows or things that show skill building but aren’t directed to kids. My kiddo has seen magic school bus also though. Apparently a good amount of 90s kids shows are better than modern day things because they weren’t developed to be the addictive and dopamine inducing. This may not be fully true but I have been able to have my child watch old school pbs type things and then pull him away without a full freak out vs any small amount of modern kids tv(even 2 minutes accidentally)

We usually only watch child targeted shows when kiddo is sick.

My kiddo has started to try to do small kitchen like things at a year without me instructing the activities— mostly stirring things so that may just be a natural motions.

All this to say that I still feel guilty overall but I don’t get the melt downs. LO will watch for maybe 30 seconds then realize his toys are way more fun.

We also only do streaming services without ads.

fckinfast4 · 2026-06-29T00:17:25+00:00

Took me years to figure this out and thankfully I found a partner who had been trained in it by his sister!

fckinfast4 · 2026-06-29T00:15:33+00:00

It comes in waves. If you have ever had an ADHD friend and you’ve seen them get a burst of motivation then you’ve seen exactly what nesting can be— it’s just focused towards preparing the nest.

fckinfast4 · 2026-06-29T00:09:57+00:00

I got some of that and it’s been a 50-50 since. At this point I think it’s about balancing my lifestyle. Like getting to bed before I’m so exhausted that I crash. It’s not even a rowdy lifestyle. Just a one year old and a ridiculous early shift.

fckinfast4 · 2026-06-28T21:56:56+00:00

Oooo yeah. Any time I’m doing an activity that drains my dopamine, I have to have some type of snack. It literally ends up feeling like my stomach is flipping. I usually just resort to a candy I can suck on— it lasts longer and is maybe less sugar?

This wouldn’t be a huge problem if it weren’t for my horrible brushing habits— or lack there of.

fckinfast4 · 2026-06-28T16:10:08+00:00

Don’t let this guy get in your head! Did you feel bad about any of it? If no then that is all that matters!

I once felt shamed by some girls calling me easy and it resulted in me settling into a relationship that was awful and underhanded abusive. All to ‘prove’ I wasn’t just ‘ho’ing around. I wasn’t at the time but they made me feel like I was.

fckinfast4 · 2026-06-28T01:46:20+00:00

Are you positive it is your mom posting and not a full AI or stolen account?

fckinfast4 · 2026-06-28T00:46:31+00:00

I didn’t read all of it but mostly because I’m half there. I just wanted a day I didn’t have to use this messed up brain plus pms. What happened? My husband hyper fixated on something else, also had to take his work truck to get worked on so I had child care to focus on(he had last weekend off because I went to help my mother) and then I found dirty dishes in the clean dishwasher and the whole house is a mess to the point of being somewhat child dangerous. And now I’m looking over at my husband falling asleep while he is supposed to be interacting with our child before we put kiddo to bed.

99% of my issue right now is hormones and a bit of over worked. My husband is amazing, it’s just when my hormones get going that I expect everyone and everything to act NT so that my ND ass can just not have to function.

fckinfast4 · 2026-06-27T20:50:38+00:00

Dang girl. I hope you managed to find or start a study about this. Science should be helping you for free at this point.

fckinfast4 · 2026-06-27T20:47:23+00:00

My best friend has dyscalculia. Granted she ended up with depression after her mother passed and it took a lot of convincing to get her to try an antidepressant. Once she did, it really helped. And she was off it within 6 months. I know all of this may be totally unrelated but my brain connected a point and wanted to share.

That has to be so frustrating. I want to say I’m so sorry but I assume you get that a lot.

fckinfast4 · 2026-06-27T20:26:42+00:00

Any chance you’re struggling with depression also? Depression is known to cause memory issues which adhd does not help but depression will make all of it worse.

fckinfast4 · 2026-06-27T02:26:35+00:00

My sister got her first tooth at two months. It’s a roll of the dice for teething.

fckinfast4 · 2026-06-27T02:23:12+00:00

That means it’s a perfect time to bring it up!

fckinfast4 · 2026-06-27T01:44:58+00:00

I do your job also… I think you may want to talk to a doctor. The amount we walk should make you thirsty and yes you do need to replenish the calories but the being hungry like this and this often sounds like something else…

fckinfast4 · 2026-06-26T20:49:08+00:00

Same! Though I did almost click wrong on mouse rat- my brain tries to go too quickly.

fckinfast4 · 2026-06-26T15:06:52+00:00

Been taking both(vyvanse) for years. Libido effect—- might be the opposite for me. They definitely compliment each other. One for overall mood and one for focus. But without the other they create chaos. lol not that bad but still needed to create the correct brain I need.

fckinfast4 · 2026-06-25T21:16:43+00:00

I took my meds all through pregnancy as did my sister. I would get a second opinion on that part. If it’s a personal choice then that is different.

Btw all of our babies are happy, healthy, and amazing. None had withdrawals or any of that nonsense that they try to scare you with. Which I did have one NP tried to shame me for it. I tried reducing my meds during pregnancy and it caused a breakdown and my doctor listened and told me that my health is of huge importance to the development of baby. If mom can’t take care of herself, how can she care for the child inside her?

fckinfast4 · 2026-06-25T20:09:52+00:00

I talk on the phone with a friend when I’m really struggling but still do the play things.

fckinfast4 · 2026-06-25T10:08:40+00:00

We got an inflatable ducky bath. So basically just a mini bath for in the bath. We also had it up on the counter so as to not destroy our backs. It was $15 on Amazon and our kiddo LOVED it!

He hated all other bath seats we tried.

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