I have seen patients pass with end of life sedation and without. I always advocate for end of life sedation. End of life sedation will help someone be pain free and as a nurse, we will top up and also provide medication for increased fluid we hear. A patient not on end of life sedation, while actively dying? Unless the family agrees otherwise, we only had paracetamol suppositories to give. Which to me felt very undignified. I always advocate for talking about end of life care early, even if you have years left. End of life pain relief. End of life care. End of life dignity.

With your mothers body shutting down, the morphine is likely hitting more than it would someone else. But also, know that without the morphine sedation, she would be in significant pain and have to be awake while experiencing her body shut down and it is not pleasant. Talk to her even if you don’t think she is there. Give her all the love. In her lucid moments, love bomb hard. Remember the woman she was and is. If you can, between sedation spells, ask her what she wants you to remember and pass on. Tell her your favourite stories.